Dumb things you believed as a kid thread

Dumb things you believed as a kid thread

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OP wasn't a faggot.

Women were nice.

...

I believed that I actually mattered to someone

black women had chocolate milk and black men had chocolate cum

My sister told me that the doors that they bring shopping carts through were for midgets to enter and exit the store.

the earth is round

youtube.com/watch?v=TwVTym-ZOc8

moon made of cheese

I thought my palms would get hairy if I jerked off to much.

I thought the lids on fast food sodas with little buttons for "diet" and "regular" was for a survey and some employee had to go dig the lids out of the trash and tally the results to see what soda people liked

That brown cows made chocolate milk.

Blacks are people just like you and me.

That jet fuel could melt steel beams.

Kek

Jews rule the world.

I thought Sup Forums was good and Moot would stay with us forever.

Packing peanuts contain dog pee

just kill yourself

...

That if I tucked my hair behind my ears, it would make my ears permanently stick out.

My dad would tell me that if I kept making dumb faces at him that my face would stick like that forever.

>Moot would stay with us forever

that's sad

That a college education guaranteed a job

Same here

>that women peed out of their bum
>that Chinese and Japanese were the same people
>if I planted a Smartie it would grow into a Smartie plant

That girls pee out of their butthole

I knew better when I was 5

I might actually amount to something someday and there was someone for everyone so nobody would have to spend their life alone

I can't believe I was dumb enough to have ever believed in God.

That life woud always be fun

i thought i could never lose weight

I used to believe my dad loved me and would always be there for me

that my dad would come back

Religion.

Nigger detected

life is worth living

Found the nigger.

>as a kid
>cum

Nope you just made that up

That if I stretched my penis enough it would get stronger

Faggot, go matter for yourself.

Dogs were only boys
Cats were only girls

That id check these dubs

>The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.

Jesus

Niggers dont steal

I'm a gigantic nigger daggot

i thought i only had a certain amount of blood and if i bled too many times in my life i would die

Yeah, I used to hit all the buttons to fuck the system

Religion
And that a vagina was a triangle cracks that you had to move up and down like a light switch

Tv comercials was shooting live,. And they have to act it over and over again

Those poor employees

If that was true, girls wouldn't live long

...

You can have my girlfriend. I'll fucking pay you. She's pretty hot, a caramel color, almond eyes, straight black hair, skinny waist, big ass. You'll be the envy of all your friends if you don't let on to how shitty of a person she is. I'm just so sick of her shit and I cuss her out all the time and tell her to leave but she won't. I suspect she's waiting for me to knock her lights out so I can get a domestic violence charge. Please take her. Maybe she's perfect for you.

my dad would stop beating my mom

Gross

Either OP's dad is being a faggot again or OP has abandoned us

>The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.

Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Wait, wrong thread

And im a holy sword

That there were fundamentally good people in the world

*tips fedora*

pic?

FAGGOT

I for some fucking reason believed when it rained somewhere, it was raining everywhere.

Life getting better.

I knew cum make woman pregnant,.
But didnt know how cum reach the egg

That video games bot were actual people playing against you, but I was the only one allowed to restart

This. Not a joke.

Grew up in a mostly white, smaller city. Black kids I knew were normal kids.

Suddenly after undergrad I moved to a larger city for school. 50% black people. Immediately notice that niggers account for 100% of my negative interactions with other people.

It was meant for this thread

I doubt that she'd want me

Same

that one day when i was old enough to afford a big giant box of chocolate bars i'd be happy

So true

Checkem

I thought that the little plastic buttons on fountain soda lids were there so that when homeless people went through the trash, they would know what was in there/if they wanted to drink it.

I'll convince her she can't get anyone else, and you swoop in as the knight in shining armor. We could figure something out.

Democracy

>If you closed Microsoft Word 98 while it was printing, the printer would stop working

that i would never be able to afford windows 95

>that if I plugged the extensioncord into itself I would get free electricity
>that my mom was gonna leave me to persue her dreams if I didn't keep an eye on her 24/7
>that my stuffed cat was alive when I wasn't looking
>that anime was from alaska
>that the vagina was located further up so when people fucked in the missonary the penis didn't go up the female but through the female verticaly
>that if I jerked off and liked it I was a faggot
>that every stranger who talked to me was a pedophile

that i would automatically be happy, responsible, and mature as soon as i was an adult

>If you closed Microsoft Word 98 while it was printing, the printer would stop working

No...that shit's true.

Anything you can think of about Windows products failing - is true. At least at some point in time on someone's machine.

I used to think that people who spoke different languages brains worked differently, I thought they heard their language as English if that makes sense.

That if I just figured out the correct combination of wires, switches, and battery,
I could stick wires into a bug on one end, and teleport it across to the open connection on the other end.

I thought the North American House Hippo was real.

you know how in 3d zelda games if you flick the control stick down link will automatically face the camera without having to rotate his body? i thought i could do that too and would get frustrated as fuck when it wouldn't work

If this is the future of the west we may as well just slit our own throats and let ISIS take over

That criminals would be punished and voting mattered

i thought anime was real

This

i thought by the time i was an adult the technology would exist to make pokemon real, and real life would basically be like the pokemon anime

Undyne, get off Sup Forums. This is no place for you.

>inb4 wow what an autist

I didn't know that people were buried in front of their tombstones. I always thought that all of their bones were removed and that they were folded up, and then the tombstone was molded around them and planted in the ground. I don't know where the hell that theory came from, but that's what I believed until I went to my grandpa's funeral when I was about 10.

I wasn´t aware it was possible to melt metal.

I thought that mental retardation was contagious after a tard girl kissed me under the slide during recess one day in second grade

Shit almost turned me gay, yo

my dad had the super power to magically open the cleaning lid of the washing machine with his superior hands
>he fooled me

I thought that under ROADS was like... a BLACK VOID... Because my grandmother said there was NOTHING under roads once and I took it litterally till I was like... 12..