/brit/

Posting from work edition

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anime

so uhm lads

what did u do for new years

kay-on

babestation

>two threads

janny won't like this

you utter runt posting the new before me

ol' 'cide

me surveying the runt farm

nonce

just thinking about how we can't survive with carbon monoxide

walther ppk

...

why the FUCK are /brit/ threads so fast in midnight?
jesus I don't want to imagine what it's like during the day

no

would do anything to protect her smile lads

janny is going to blow his LID lads

the gf is making pancakes, anyone want one? x

gp told me suicide is never an option
would appreciate more honesty to be frank

London more like Lon-dumb :DDD

just told my runt of a client that suicide is not an option

tbqf i just want to see him suffer haha, looks too much like some bender

Quite tired of these wankstains on /brit/ complaining about being sad and wanting to kill themselves

tumblr is right there mates

is this porn? are we watching porn?

wouldn't date a disabled girl because everyone would see us and think i'm a fetishist whereas if i was disabled and normal girl dated me they'd think she was doing me a favour

fucking androphobic society

haitiANO

Naked Maddie boobs on babestation

will spend my time putting smarties under my foreskin until some posts worth reading appear

feeling a bit sad
might do myself in

...

Currently investing in suicide options

Ireland all knackered after a long day of posting

Quite tired of these wankstains on /brit/ boasting about being happy and wanting to live life to the fullest

facebook is right there mates

reminder that this thread was LITERALLY made by the real img1142 looking for attention

the real full image has never been posted before apart from the half face he posted before

i-i want to help her...

>outing yourself as a paki

retards need love too

maddie went missing 10 years ago m8

no it's a girl with cerebral palsy making pancakes, you odd man

>it's another I can see a tear on my frenulum because my dick doesn't have enough skin to accommodate the amount of blood I get with a full erection episode
>it's another every time I jerk off and cum I significantly damage the health of my dick skin and further increase my penile insecurities which in turn even further solidifies my fate as a wizard...episode

im so happy right now lads

truly living to the fullest right now haha

can't imagine sleeping honestly

>check that family photo out

I got up off my couch, went to the closet where my maid keeps her supplies, and got a bottle of Clorox bleach. I went back to the couch, sat down, removed the cap, and took a swig. I did this four times, thinking that bleach was so toxic it would get me high then make me pass out. Yeah... not exactly. Instead I threw up violently, everywhere. I vomited like a fountain, all over the couch, all over the carpet, and all over myself. I fell to the floor and kept vomiting. I got up, slipping and sliding in the puddle of puke, as I stumbled to my terrace to get some fresh air. I vomited all over the terrace and terrace door as bleach, blood, booze, pills, and whatever food I’d eaten in the last twenty-four hours came out of me.

was in london

went to a party at koko in london

came really close to pulling a swedish victoria's secret model.

broke my phone

honestly not even lying, have no clue why the fuck she was so into me

Be careful not to choke on your gimmicks

imagine being such an arsehole that you'd post photos of your m8 on Sup Forums for attention haha

the gf and i are doing great

couldn't be happier lads

wanking to traps is not gay

woah

caralad?

desire a skinny milf with big natural chebs to have a wank to lads

suggestions?

suicide is an option
but literally the worst option
death is inevitable and will happen someday
why end it early?

>inb4 suffering

in a 1st world country lmao

I'm looking at her landing strip of fanny hair on babestation right now m8

Mystery solved

>its another go to sleep hoping to die but actually wake up episode

>sister was in london during new years
>she looks like a victoria secret model
be careful lad

honestly get turned on by the thought of doxxing myself

youtube.com/watch?v=a7ir3Y9mT2k

bangre

>its another "making fucking abhorrent posts on Sup Forums" episode

>death is terrifying
>sleep isn't

>in a 1st world country lmao

i will NEVER have her. that's worse than all your bloody cleft pilates combined

Your mom

what's her first name lad.

I was too sick to run into a wall or try to knock myself out (but I thought about it), so the only thing I could think of that would make me faint was losing blood. I didn’t want to die, I just wanted to lose enough to lower my blood pressure. Then I’d faint, fall asleep, and finally get some rest. This seemed like a logical thing to do at the time. I didn’t even consider what would have happened after I fell asleep, after losing that much blood. None of that mattered, only finding the falling feeling. What can I say, I’ve never been good at planning ahead.
I went to the kitchen and got the biggest chef’s knife I had. Then I lay down on the couch and cut into my stomach. I’d stab it a bit, then slice into it, and then squeeze the wounds to make the blood run out faster. I continued to do this—a stab followed by a cut—as my blood flowed. I watched it run down my legs, onto the couch and floor, just staring at the color of it. I didn’t feel any pain after the first few cuts, just the strange invasion of the knife, but after a few rounds of stabbing I got used to it. I started to dig the knife in deeper and slice into myself harder. In the hospital they counted a total of nine wounds, three of them deep enough to really make the red run. I started to feel light-headed and woozy, which made me want to lie down in my bed. I’d get some sleep after all.
I got up, my head spinning, and shuffled through the pool of blood, vomit, and bleach on the floor. My hand left a trail of red along the wall as I made my way to the bedroom and since my blood had been running out at a steady rate for some time, I began to feel faint. I made it to the bed, lay down, and began to nod in and out of consciousness. It was what I’d wanted to do for hours.

I'm a fan of Kelsey Majors. Well worth a look.

FOY

what does it mean if i girl tells me she "would ride my cock till it bleeds and then suck the blood out of the sores with her mouth" lads

>go to bed every night hoping to die of sudden adult death syndrome
>never do

still get scared of the dark aha
#runtlife

she's faking it!

sofia

gives me anxiety thinking about it haha one of my friends thought it'd be funny to post my photo on /fit/ like 7 years ago haha. I never got doxxed and no one even said I was ugly which I see as a massive accomplishment given it was /fit/ and Sup Forums

means that mum's on the wine again

>FOY

If I knew where that was I'd be rich and immortal

ur just like a reddit fag trying to fit in

maybe u get an upboat

r0tf

>"Black-ish" sitcom
>everyone producing it is Jewish

kek

might or might not have boned her

Your dogs name is Ireland

Cool name for a doggo desu

imagine putting in all the effort raising a daughter just for her to grow up to be a professional slag

...

Other than the abo behind the wall there is not a single thing wrong with this desk

Perfect workspace

Free (You)s.

I had a fear of sleep a few years ago. Probably the nastiest experience I've ever had.

imagine putting in all the effort raising a son just for him to be an australian

all me

nice

>oh no the jews are promoting... family values and cultural assimilation

pornhub.com/view_video.php?viewkey=1379347643&t=48

>the guy out of kangaroo jack
they must be producing it that hard

nah wasn't her, her name was hanna. though she did have a friend called either sofie or sofia

if anyone is in london please firebomb a nightclub called egg, they cockblocked me basically.

hmm

may or may not be ok with this

post pic of yourself

is that laurence fishburne and fat albert?

I would be proud that a fugly retard like me could make something that hot, 2bh

what's that princess chelsea slag's instagram?

might do an ol cide' this thursday lids

>I had a fear of sleep a few years ago. Probably the nastiest experience I've ever had.

But sleeping is scary. How the fuck is laying down for a few minutes and then suddenly going unconcious for x amount of time you have no control over not scary?
what if you never wake up?

hey kangaroo jack is iconic

The Canadian Rothberg strikes again

One of my m8s died suddenly in his sleep in March 2004. I now realise how lucky he was

no one put in effort on me

always the father's fault

Why are they laughing at me?