Be American

>Be American
>Get shot

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youtube.com/watch?v=h6z2NdKWe7M
twitter.com/AnonBabble

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>Be European
>get beheaded, ran over, and shot while my wife is gangraped

top kek

>be american wal-mart greeter
>get shot
>forget to greet customer
>get fired

>Be chinese
>Wake up for work
>Can't use the elevator as it cut someone in half
>Use stairs instead
>Can't use car as the garage collapsed on it
>Bareley avoid getting swallowed by sidewalk sinkole
>Narrowly dodge a car that rolls over a 4 year old child
>Finally make it to the train station
>Escalator eats the guy in front of me
>10 people are teampled to death trying to get on the train
>Train derails killing hundreds
>Crawl out of rubble and stumble to work
>Clock in at the oil refinery and light a cigarette
>Resulting explosion vaporizes 4 city blocks

>Be a nigger
>take good care of my wife and children

>Be fat Fuck American
>Suffer from diabetes
>Go to mall in disability chair
>Get shot
>Pay hospital bills
>Suffer heart attack cuz of fat unhealthy slob ass
>Die

It's the 1st of August, not April.

>American
>Fag
>Goes on Sup Forums because he doesn't have any friends.

>be american
>not poor and working at walmart
>have guns and shooting at shit
>laugh at everyone else
>the euro lol

/tnks

>be african
>die from obesity

>be american
>die from starvation

>amerifats actually have to tip their shooter or else he has the constitutional right to shoot them again

CANNOT FABRICATE

>be american
>shoot

You forgot the best part!
>Finally get to work, where I work myself to near-death until I return home to unhappiness at the end of the day

>be Eurocuck
>see comment I don't like on the internet
>get mad and respond
Top kek m8

Fatfuck

>murifat can't handle the banter

Kek

I really really like this thread

>be Canadian
>bump into guy on the sidewalk
>apologize profusely
>he does as well
>spend 10mins apologizing back and forth
>tfw Canadians dont get shot nearly as often as americans

>not poor
>have 5 credit card
I have a bad news for you, burger.

You are on Sup Forums too? Euro scum

>Be German
>biking to work
>hit by IED
>thunderous applause from pedestrians
>men beat their women for getting out of line
> German men start crying tears of joy and yelling "Allahu akbar"
>police arrive
>get arrested for hate crime

Kek

>Be Canadian
>work full time
>get paid weekly
>$600 a week but only takes home $200 after tax
>live in a 1 bedroom apartment
>pay $600 because it's a small town
>pay $1000 for hydro because it's a small town

>Be Russian
> play Csgo
>ping 300
>looksgoodblin.ru
>adjust potato for chat
> game start
> fly across map, die
>Cykablyat.wav
>"team bad"

this cuck is triggered. stay cucked eu. sandniggers everywhere.

>living on earth

plebs, all of them

>Be britcuck
>rise for national anthem
>Saleel sawarim

>be belgian
>get bombed

>be german
>get axed

>be french
>get ran over

>be american
>get shot

>be australian
>get killed by bugs

canada truly is a nice place

are you ready for refugees canada? chink canada, good shitpost

...

upset?????

The only accurate post in thread

>Be me a 20 year old cis white male with a degree in African Drum Circle Theory
>Decide to take my polyamorous non-binary significant other (who has a masters on women's studies) on a vacation to Europe
>get off the plane
>blown up
>that makes me hungry
>go to the nearest restaurant and ask the man at the register for some european cuisine
>he hands me a menu for the finest Syrian cuisine
>turn to my wife to ask her what diarrhea she would like to order
>she is too busy being raped by six dirty men to answer
>order my pick of diarrhea
>watch as the man at the register literally shits his feces onto some flatbread
>take my food to a table
>my wife has to eat at a special section just for women outside in the hot sun
>"how progressive!" I exclaim
>While eating my feces I can't help but grin from the delicious flavor
>hear gunshots followed by an explosion
>fear for my significant other's safety
>go outside to check on her
>sigh in relief as she is just being safely raped by 12 angry men screaming "Allahu Akbar!" as they cum into every one of her orifice
>turn to go back into the restaurant to eat my food
>restaurant explodes
>struggle to find my food among the feces and blood that has spilled everywhere because of the exploded bodies
>decide to leave and take my significant other with me
>get blown up
>go to our hotel
>pay for our room
>take the elevator into our room
>significant other is raped by 2 men in the elevator
>go into our room
>take the Holy Quran out from the drawer beside our bed
>read it and then pray to Allah
>go to sleep
>have a nightmare of Donald Trump trying to convince me that I should be the only one fucking my wife
>wake up relived to see my wife in bed with me being fucked by a man who had broken into our room
>go on phone, feeling like trolling some of those evil bigoted Sup Forumstards
>start a thread
>">Be American >Get shot"

kek

youtube.com/watch?v=h6z2NdKWe7M

lets finish this

>be me
>live in Brazil, Rio de Janeiro
>wake up at 9:00 to go to school
>no breakfast because bread and milk tax went up by 900%
>thank Dilma and Temer for tax increases
>go outside
>breath the fresh air of exposed sewer water and weed smoke
>shirtless nigga kid sneaks up behind me and steals my phone
>stop him, immediately get downed by the police for aggression to the underaged
>drug dealers suddenly fire at the police, who were armed only with sticks
>get shot by drug dealers