Name something a robber wouldn't want to find in your house

Name something a robber wouldn't want to find in your house.

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My fedora collection.

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The man trap in my doorway

A rose pedal trail.

Snakes.

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Happiness

Me.

Another nigger.

NIGGERS.

Oh I think you do.

My 10 cats.

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Another robber!

Dildo and gun collection

white people
>black and proud come at me and ill bust a cap in your ass, cracka ass white boy

shut up whitie

Baby cadavers.

a woman :(

A guy who says "Let's not turn your rape into a murder".

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answer: tripwire

/thread

Clone of Steve Harvey

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Cops

Me with a gun and a gimp mask the robber...

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A safe full of angry bees

A Tupperware filled with my wife's feces.

Another angry nigger

A black light system that's on a 2 minute delay, once they're on they reveal the house is covered wall to wall with dried semen.

Half a worm in his Apple

Half an apple in his worm

The son/daughter whose life he skipped out on

A house filled with nothing but squeaky floorboards, in talking like 4 stories and an attic motherfucker

The only thing of value in the house are 200lb buckets of pennies.

god damn. That's probably made of foam but could you imagine the type of guy that it took to wield that thing. Crazy.

Another robber

Every stair in the house is very slightly different.

The door knobs and Windows have doe in heat urine that can't be washed off for months.

FBI already there to take my computers

Why

A reasonably sized penis

Your hands will smell like strong cat piss no matter how much you wash them.

so does your house

It's a win win if you're a male deer

No I understand that. I'm trying to figure out why the piss is on the windows and doors in the first place

So the robber smells vaguely of piss for weeks.

Brownies

The launch codes and the big red phone off the hook.

So the only reason is for home security, got it

Blood everywhere

The Jews in my attic.

HARAMBE
A
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A
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Kek
this is genius if you think about it

if i broke in a house that had those, you'd find your toilets clogged with pennies

my collection of colostomy bags.

with a few logs on top of the pennies for good measure

my toilets both already clogged with quikrete

Nothing of value, that can be easily taken, combined with bored ass dogs and a nocturnal owner whom doth posses mad firearms.

A Quran and 25 pressure cookers

>whom doth posses mad

All of the photos on the wall are of different Mexican family's with lazy eyes.

This video
youtu.be/Aqg5bKMV5rk

My shrine to my failed attempts of applying to trump inc.

A freezer full of dead kittens

Chris Hansen

Scurry

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Logan Smith

Napalmz

Rice.

Devin

wtf man

My sister panties that I encrusted my cum into last night

Bernie Mac

Ms. Hidalgo

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Printed out posters of tentacle rape

Kyle boi

Time bomb about to go off

This video
youtube.com/watch?v=i4M1RHWMT1g

>black and proud
>you can't be both pick one

My pokedex. Leave my Pokemon alone, nigga!

Another nigger