The thread seemed kinda popular so let's see if we can continue this shit.
St. Peter looks at John and says, "Whoa. Hardcore dude." When John arrives in Hell, Satan is waiting but instead of an actual hell of burning and chains and whatever other kinky shit is there, Satan has another proposition. "John, you truly are one hardcore bro. So, how about we smoke some blunts, drink a little, and you can consider becoming my Vice President of Hell." Dubs decides.
Mason Sanchez
I want to be president.
Jonathan Anderson
El presidente
Owen Myers
john shits on the carpet
Nolan Wood
Pick up the bottle and glass satan
Charles Taylor
finally fuck
Jacob Turner
Wait so is Satan like elected democratically or what?
Adam Powell
double dubs checked
Nathaniel Diaz
I want to go to bed. Can John just be sacked into the void?
Matthew Reyes
"Holy shit!" yells Satan. "My new throw rug! You are not a radical dude! Fuckin die John!" Time for a boss battle. Use your rolls wisely. 1 decides. Determine a course of action for John to take to try and defeat the boss, (punch boss, throw picture frame at boss, etc.)
Colton Rivera
Then go to bed sweet one. Chicken tendies will be waiting in the morning.
Brayden Ross
Toss the turd rug at satan
Angel Murphy
finger bang gun
Gavin Campbell
John tries to attack Satan with his awesome anime fighting skills, doing sick flips and stuff He then realises that anime lied and he can't fight for shit
Elijah Perry
nice winwar
Bentley King
John falcon punches Satan in the dick.
Chase Bell
I ate all the tendies while I was fucking your grandpa. We are both enjoying the bread but would like a good ending.
Nicholas Lopez
John goes full weeb and tries to attack Satan. His poor fighting skills cost him 30 HP as Satan viciously slaps him like the little anime bitch he was being. C'mon John. 2 decides. Can John stop being a bitch for now and defeat Satan?
Oliver Cooper
Trump!
Anthony Edwards
John manages to cuck Satan with a dragon dildo
Nicholas Thomas
Roll
Gavin Ramirez
winrar?
Eli Hughes
John fucks one of Satan's many demon whores, one who he happened to have feelings for, with a dragon dildo. Satan is emotionally hurt and loses 25 HP. What a bitch. 3 decides.
Mason Evans
Stops being a bitch a robo punches Satan in the nuts
Owen Thompson
Rollin
Austin Nelson
John apologizes for shitting up Satan's rug, and dragon dildo dicking his favorite demon bitch. They hug it out. All is forgiven.
Lucas Collins
John grabs the bottle off the table and smashes it over Satan's head.
Jeremiah Jones
Reroll.
Anthony Parker
Re re roll.
Colton Howard
john grows a thirty foot dick and uses it to smash satan against the wall
Thomas Torres
oh shit i got it whaddup
Asher Walker
John and Satan share the sex Toys
Blake Roberts
John's dick elongates after the sexual pleasure of fuckin Satan's bitch with a dildo. John's dick is an erect 30 incher and it's gonna be erect for a while. He smashes Satan with it bringing him down to 50 HP. John's dick is so big however that he now moves slower. Satan recovers and uses quick movement to outmaneuver John and strike him for damage. 4 decides.
Gavin Parker
John sticks a foot up satans ass, then shoots him
Kayden Walker
Use robotic arm to once again fap like lightning and cum on Satan to glue him to the wall. Super fap powers
Nolan Robinson
Roll
Nolan Morgan
REROLL
Brandon Butler
ROLLS
Isaac Brown
Dick shrinks and John robo arm uppercuts satans nuts
Matthew Roberts
John calls the police, telling them that Satan is a nigger He tells them to send all cops, SWAT and riot police because they should expect a chimp out
Tyler Wilson
Roll
John Collins
Reroll
Dominic Wright
FUCKING ROLL!!!
Brody Ross
4 get
Asher Wood
Waste
Caleb Sanchez
John requests a short bathroom break and clogs satans toilet
Julian Martin
Final roll
John Miller
John uses political correctness to prove Satan isn't real.
Jonathan Jenkins
Roll
Connor James
Looks like Satan's not how he used to be. He's within an inch of his life. What will John do with him? Finish him, or use him for something far more nefarious? 5 decides.
Ryan Martinez
John calls upon a nigger chimpout to beat the shit out of satan. For good measure, john calls upon a sqaudron of police officers to shoot the chimping niggers, with satan taking bullet damage and nigger damage in the process.
Benjamin Rogers
Make Satan his janitor who cleans his rugs when he shits on them daily.
Evan Allen
Rolling for this
Justin Miller
Satan calls a timeout and becomes a feminist on tumblr
Evan Rivera
John rips off Satan's horn, uses it to cuck Satan again, then shoves it up Satan's ass
Levi Adams
reroll
Ryan Jones
winrar, he got 5 OP
Jordan Parker
John pisses in Satan's eye and pokes it
John Walker
I'm gonna go head and assume that you meant to reply to the more recent one. In the chaos of the SWAT riot of Satan's house in hell, John manages to escape the nigger vs. police conflict and find his way to the exit of Hell. He takes Satan's demon bitch with him. John comes back to life at his own funeral in front of thousands of people celebrating his achievements as an American hero, from the previous thread. Satan's bitch is with him and George W. Bush Jr. is there to greet him. 6 decides.
Jaxson Walker
Thanks fam.
Rolling for John trades George w bush jr his whore for being the president
Jordan Walker
John rapes his own corpse
Kevin Jenkins
Shake George W. Bush's hand and greet him as well. Wave and smile to the crowd and tell them that it's an honor to be here. John then lives out the rest of his days peacefully with his shit ton o' money. He eventually marries the demon bitch and they have 3 abominations together. George W. Bush went on to be the first returning president in history as he fucks up the rule on only two terms. Trump becomes his VP and then serves again after George. Satan got arrested and is still being held in Neo Alcatraz to this day. And as for the thread, well, it died peacefully.
Nicholas Phillips
John calls up his gay lover Pope Francis and together they resurrect Harambe just to kill him again, gaining 50 exp
Nolan Wright
John goes to Iran to grind exp
Josiah Jackson
Fucking wasted roll
Sebastian Wood
Spiderman!
Anthony Reed
John and Satan's bitch kidnap George W Bush.
Jace Young
I'm true to my word user. John's adventure ends today. Maybe he'll return someday. This is his 5th adventure after all.
Ending: We already know what happened to John, George, and Satan. But about the others? OP went on to become the biggest faggot there was. Some say he sucks cock even to this day. St. Peter was regretful that he had to let John go but John inspired him to pursue bigger things. He now works as an accountant for Vishnu. John's TV at the beginning ended up starring in several other quest threads before going on to Hollywood to star in famous movies. He died of an overdose in Las Vegas at the age of 35. John's dragon dildo continues to cuck others even to this day.
Evan Roberts
Was the SWAT Officer who arrested Satan the same Officer in boxers from the LAPD North Hollywood shootout
Luis Barnes
No. In fact, a SWAT officer was not the one who arrested Satan. It was one of the police officer's on the scene, a deputy Jimmy Russels. Jimmy was killed in a BLM riot a few weeks later. This is one of the events that led to the impending race war which was ended when current president Trump nuked half of America.