What's your idea of a perfect funeral?

What's your idea of a perfect funeral?

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Release the pigs

I want to be put in fireworks. Not ashes. I want to go in little bags, wet. Just a shitload of fireworks reigning down bits of me over a field in Kansas.

The one that doesn't happen.

Fuck funerals, they're horrible morbid affairs and I don't want one.

But with bits raining down on friends and loved ones.

Oh comr on. You can have fun being morbid.

i want to have an open casket and a roast session

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My perfect funeral would be if you all came to it and then it all got blown the fuck up by ISIS.

m.liveleak.com/view?i=857_1405989681
The perfect funeral.

>enlightenment
guys are not keys, women aren't locks

go back to china and learn your proverbs before you open your mouth, you stupid gook

Wishes do come true. Unfortunately they only happen once. You're going to need to be more original

I've fucked more beautiful locks with my key than you ever will you ugly little pussy.

This, except over the ocean

yeah because your dick is small and you can't get a real chick. fatties don't count, faggot

You're still a slut a male slut

For the sharks?

I'm 6'1", italian, and I play D1 rugby for an American uni. Go out for drinks usually every Thurs and Sat night, I've probably had sex with about 30-40 different women and I'm 25 years old.

Tell me you don't believe it so I can go to sleep with a big fuckin grin tonight buddy.

So basically this but more colorful?
youtu.be/1_t44siFyb4

Only the privileged get to slut as well as me. I'm living.

American don't care about rugby. That's worse than saying you play soccer.

Rugby is straight up blossoming in the states. We just got an Olympic team....

Go outside little boy.

I dont care how many girls you drugged and raped, it doesn't make you cool, knuckledragger

I think it would be more impressive had I drugged and raped them. That would have been way more work.

With hpv, and herpes. Anyway stop derailing the thread. How would you like us to treat your remains after you did from AIDS or whatever.

I don't care. you're talking to someone who's had roughly the same it isn't hard to have lots of sex, you fucking mouli

I've never had an STD actually, I probably have some form of HPV from raw dogging so many women you wish you could be in the same room with.

This is getting embarrassing for you guys.

I can pretty much guarentee I'm way better looking than you, and in effect get much better looking women than you do.

I promise.

Thread derailed.

I'm a kickboxer and older than you are. Anyway stop derailing. No one cares how many times you for the clap, this isn't the thread for that. Unless you make it a sex themed funeral.

I kickboxed when I was a kid, and then I went to college. I wrestled competitively and I've been an athlete and a bodybuilder all my life. Fuck off with your little muscles and your kicks.

Sure, kiddo. Listen get the fuck our of my thread. I'm trying to plan a funeral. Asshole

post a picture or gtfo faggot

This thread is garbage. I'm the only one making this entertaining for anybody.

I wanted to be floated out on the ocean in one of those viking funeral pyres while Freebird plays. Then just when it hits the guitar solo a pair of fighter jets do a flyover and launch one missile each at the pyre.

Even if I did you'd just say some bullshit. I know who I am and I know what I can get. I'm just doing this to you because I'm bored and about to get some sleep.

You're a nerd that comes here every night. Both of you are little bitches.

Garbage thead.

only an idiot would believe some mouthy faggot on the internet

Just yourself. With your bragging about imaginary sex. Isn't it a school night?

kek

yeah i thought so... fuck of with your fatass

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My funeral must have at least 3 deaths, or it will be considered a very dull affair.

Ok. Bye.

Fuck yeah. So fireworks?

I want it to be an open casket , then the song monster mash comes on and they have my body on strings so it props me up. So someone can use the strings and dance my body around like a puppet.

Hellzs yeah. Everyone needs to get smashed too.

I like it.

Yeah, what this user said. I've been to a few funerals and I just don't understand the point. Hey, let's all get together for one last look at the dead guy before we put hin in a hole to rot! Not to mention that it costs the family a small fortune for the coffin and service.

If I have any useful organs, they can donate them to save some kids life and then just toss the rest in a dumpster.

Jewish funerals are pretty cheap. No embalming allowed and the coffin is designed to break down. There is no viewing of the body. It's all pretty straight forward.

Traditional Jewish coffin. They uses to drill holes in the bottom to boot.

Thrown on a landmine from an aircraft. It will help detonate the leftover mines as well. Just chop me up first for maximum coverage.