Tfw you could be fucking jonah hill's mom right now

>Tfw you could be fucking jonah hill's mom right now.

I would give her my footlong if you know what I mean

you think she eats subway with him sometimes

Is she a fatty like her tubby son?
That other chick is hot for a kike

literally the plot of cyrus

for your health!

I can't even get college sluts to match with me on tinder

> have you met my wife's son, he's hilarious

>dat sausage sniper on the right

...

>I'll let you fuck me in the arse, but you have to be a father to my son first.

What do?

>anal
>better than vaginal sex

spoken like a true virgin

>Jonah, come 'ere. Have a seat. We need to talk.

Lay down the law, tell him there's a new Sheriff in town, things are gonna change, healthy eating, take off at night so mom and I can sex, come to me with any questions I'm you're dad now

...

URGH
BACK TO THE LOCH WITH YOU NESSIE

This isn't his sister. Pic related is.

>Lay down the law, tell him there's a new Sheriff in town, things are gonna change, healthy eating, take off at night so mom and I can sex, come to me with any questions I'm you're dad now

Jonah: "Yeah here's 100k now get the fuck out of our lives".

>Jonah has bigger tits

Still would desu

>tfw you have a chance to bang the mother of the man who taught us that eating subway is the path to enlightenment

So, i need to cut my penis to hit that?

aaaaand i'm out, peace y'all

AYE

>not hanging out with Jonah instead

dude is hilarious

>Implying you would get shit
>Implying he wouldn't call the Hollywood mafia on you, who would take you to Weinstein where you would be raped for days before getting disposed off

If Jonah is my wifes son and I divorce her do I get him to pay me alimony for 18 years since he makes more than me?

that would be a kickass movie, also get james franco and this other constantly stoned idiot, you know which one

Kek.