I drank 12 quadruple espressos today

I drank 12 quadruple espressos today.

Just got done shitting literally a gallon of liquid fire, the last third of which was blood.
>Currently posting from the tub to cool my burning asshole.
What do?

I'd drink some water

From the tub?

Use baby powder on fiery asshole, then shoot yourself in the head, it'll be better than whats to come.

...

I don't have a baby to powder. Any alternatives?

Drink some water or you'll fucking die

But I've been bathing in it. That's gross.

>drink water
>use baby powder
>cry

eat chili. really hot chili. they cancel each other.

But I'm vegan. And special.

just eat bean chill, no meat. or raw chillis. go on, you'll thank me.

Isn't that enough caffeine to fuck you up?

>2016
>Violence against beans
Fucking barbarian.

That was the point. Now my butt hurts. Help me.
>I'm solving captchas at the speed of road signs thanks to my new found super powers.

You retard get out of the tub and get a glass of water.

I don't wanna. It feels good on the O-ring.

sometimes there must be sacrifices. you could try a vinegar enema

My dad's using the enema for the next few hours.

excuses, excuses. negotiate a share plan with your dad

Jokes on you. I don't drink espresso. Thx for the yous, nigger.

/
i'm horrified, how could you

HA!
>He's so fucking mad that he got master bungled.

>this thread

Use Vaseline to help soothe it.

Is he choking? Why didn't he finish the making of words?

I ate it all last Tuesday.

You need an espresso enema.

\By ingesting through your rectum it counteracts the caffeine that you consumed.

Use corn starch

Don't drink 12 quadruple espressos

I have my corn dry cleaned. They're very good China men and don't use starch.

Take some viks yum

>Don't do this. It makes mustard gas.

I don't know Vik though.