I fucked a girl in the ass last night and used a shit ton of lube, and it made the poo inside super creamy...

I fucked a girl in the ass last night and used a shit ton of lube, and it made the poo inside super creamy, and when I was done I pulled out and my dick was covered in shit. I almost threw up as I was washing my dick off. Relate to this somehow.

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I've never had shit on my dick so

so you like your shit hard ?
creamy shit is always shitty

used to do my ex in the ass a lot. About 6 months of doing this and it was always clean on the pull out. Until one time it wasn't.... Then I awkwardly sat in her bathroom cleaning shit off my dick... we broke up like a month later

If you don't get her to do any prep beforehand then expect that sort of shit you moron. Wtf did you honestly expect?

She sat on the toilet and watched me clean my dick off. I wasnt disgusted by it, just the smell was unholy. She got mad cause I kept gagging haha.

I wasn't complaining, dickwad. I was sharing an experience.

Women who eat a lot of fat have messy asses. Unless they douche before sex, you will get a slimey shitty dick.

Anal is best with vegans, they don't have digestive systems lined with undigested animal fats. Vegitarians are pretty good, too - but, if they eat a lot of cheese and drink full fat milk, expect a shitty dick.

Sometimes you get very unlucky with anal. Remeber kids, life isn't like the movies.

Very informative. Yeah she eats total crap.

My vegetarian girlfriend has a clean poo hole

fucking women ey

So does mine

WHY ARE YOU GUYS SO BAD AT CLEANING FOR ANAL

>FUCKING GOOGLE IT YOU STUPID FAGS

Here's how I personally did it when I started anal:
>Buy a "plunger" it's basically a syringe but without the needle, see the pic I posted
>Fill it with lukewarm water about 25ml is usually what I used
>Sit on the toilet with your feet on the toilet rim and your knees against your chest
>This straightens the intestines out a bit and helps get the dirty stuff out
>lube up a finger and stick it inside your hole checking for shit
>If you find some, use your finger and help ease it out. Fingering yourself sometimes helps for some reason
>if there is none there push your finger as deep as you can, still none then get the syringe
>Push a SMALL amount of water in not the entire fucking 25ml maybe 5ml at most per push
>clench your ass and pull the syringe away then shit out all the water
>this moves your shit from further inside you closer to your asshole
>keep doing this until all 25ml of water in the syringe is gone! once all 25ml is gone then
>check your asshole again with your finger, finger yourself a bit maybe use 5-10ml more if you're really cautious
>if there is still nothing, take a washcloth, soak it with water and put a bit of sweet smelling soap there
>rub said washcloth on your asshole (not IN your asshole just on it and around it)
>Take a second washcloth, soak it as well and wipe the soap off. Then dry off your ass with a towel

ITS A FUCKING MIRACLE, NOW YOU WON'T HAVE SHIT DICK.
why can't you people just google this shit ffs
and lastly, the soap is so that if your shit stinks really bad you're not going to stink afterward. It's not always necessary.
>P.S this picture is not a very good syringe, the one I have is pretty thick and can hold like 100ml instead of 10 like this one

Thats a lot of work to be in the heat of the moment.

Then don't have anal in the heat of the moment you cocksack

Would you rather take (literally 5-10 minutes no more if you know how to do it) to have clean, fun anal.

Or take no time at all and cover your bed in horrible smelling shit and coat your dick in it too. Also you fucking assholes, anal without cleaning like this HURTS LIKE A BITCH

It's extremely uncomfortable for the sub but they're probably not going to admit it, I know the one time I didn't properly clean myself it hurt like hell but I didn't admit it cause idk reasons.

It takes 5-10 fucking minutes, don't complain about messy anal and awkward anal encounters if you don't know how to clean yourself properly.

If you want anal with your girl tell her to fuck off to the washroom for 10 minutes and come back when shes nice and clean. You'll both have better sex.

So wear a condom you idiot. Serves you right.

> guys
I think the state of the guys asshole was mostly irrelevant in the stories.
But yeah, how do you get your gf to do that if she doesn't gory the idea by herself?
> come on honey, I'll show you how to give yourself an enema and clean yourself out
> you'll only have to do that almost every time ok

25ml?
You need a fuck more than that to give it a good clean. Grab showerhead, apply to hole, blast until you feel the liquid "hit your stomach" stop. Hold onto it, then squat over toilet, evacuate bowels.

Perform until you release nothing but clean water. Wait half an hour, attempt to shit. If nothing comes out. You're game baby

or clean like I suggested

shit in your subs ass hurts them during sex, clean your fucking bodies out you disgusting fucks

Kek why'd you fuck a girl in the ass when she's got a pussy ?

I'm a very small person, around 5'3" weighing around 100 pounds, so I only take 25ml

I've only needed more then 25ml like one time, and that was on a day where the days before I gorged on food like crazy.

Do not fucking completely fill your intestines with liquid like this asshole is saying that is such a bad idea. I don't know if its actually unhealthy but there's no way it can be no fucking way can that much water in your body floating around be healthy.

My method takes less time, is deff not dangerous cause I've been doing it for years with absolutely no effects and yours just sounds fucking crazy and dangerous. and its far less invasive on your body. Anyone else here not wanting to imagine shitting out like 900ml of water or more?

I met up with a girl that I met in Craigslist. She was older and kinda chubby but cool and funny and nice to talk with. We met up a few times and she wanted me to fist her. So I fisted her while she was on her back and she she came super hard and shit all over my bed.

Oh it's not that bad, I've never had any problems and i've done it plenty of times. Your method does not take less time. I tell you what the feeling of releasing that amount of water is perfect.

i'm a virgin but why clean? the girl should be clean enough. plus a bit of shit should be fine, you can even get off on that together.

No one believe this guy this sounds fucking insane

You just said:
>"Wait half an hour, attempt to shit. If nothing comes out. You're game baby"

With mine you spend 5-10 minutes carefully cleaning yourself using your finger and the water, then you're fine.

I've NEVER had a problem with my method and it takes 10 minutes max instead of fucking well over an hour cause you have to:
>Shower
>Put 900ml of water in your asshole which is not a good idea
>shit it all out in the toilet
>shower again to clean yourself (probably like 2 minutes but still)
>get out of shower dry yourself off
>wait 30 fucking minutes
>try to shit again which takes 5 minutes
>then finally you can fuck your partner
This has to take at least an hour

>You can even get off on that together
not everyone has a scat fetish in fact most don't even come close to having one

Also shit inside your ass can sometimes be very painful. I know it was for me.


>The girl should be clean enough
sometimes depending on diet you'll be clean. But most often that's not the case
most often you'll have about 2-3 long pieces of shit in you or 10-15 small pieces

>scat fetish
hey, if you're okay with it, your girl should be okay with it, right?

No, just because you have a fetish doesn't mean your girlfriend is forced to have that fetish too.

I had an EX-boyfriend who loved bondage and I fucking hated it. I flat out told him if he ever tried to put me in bondage situations I'd kick his balls until they fell off. And I was being serious. Don't fucking force your partners into fetishes you assholes.

>THAT BEING SAID
If you and your girlfriend both have a scat fetish, go to fucking town don't bother with cleaning.

I've fucked dozens of chicks in their ass.

Not ONCE have I gotten shit on my dick.

I'm not sure if I believe you....

Why do people complain about shitdick when they're pushing it in a pooper?
It's just free lube

OP here, she never complained about any pain while it was going on, and infact I think she likes the feeling when she has shit in there. Because she always wants me to go deeper. She likes it when I cum inside too because it fills her up even more. As I said, I wasn't complaining about poop at all.

I think poop makes YOU angry. Your anus is so hostile. Angry anus.

why are women (and apparently gay homosexuals) so into poo?

fuuuuck man.

maybe you just have an irrational fear of it or you don't know why it's good. like music: you're not able to get it sometimes. but someone can open it up for you, if you are open. just like you're open to my virgin cock.

Yes it does its so nasty and gross

The first and last time I got fucked with shit in my ass was the most painful sex I've ever had
>and I once had two thick sex toys in my ass at once and one real dick

you. women like YOU are into poo play. why?

"Tell me my shit doesn't stink!"

Women indeed.

>irrational fear
long story short:
I accepted some bondage with a fuck buddy and he and a friend raped me for 3 hours non stop
I have scars from it, and bad memories.

So any boy who wants to try bondage on me now gets a swift kick in the balls followed by death via shotgun

That sounds like quite a stretch.

Ty user mate

Not a woman

Well, I'm sorry you trusted someone clearly not worth trusting. This is why we can't have nice vaginas.

>So any boy who wants to try bondage on me now gets a swift kick in the balls followed by death via shotgun
that would be insulting to me, that you think i can't get you past it.

FUCKING BINGO

(excessive pussy mileage can make the booty hole more attractive)

I won't trust anyone with bondage anymore. That's not even up for debate. No.
Knew the guy for 3 years. My friend dated him for a time and said he was great so I hooked up with him when they broke up

The "friend" just magically showed up at the worst moment. Why'd you invite a third?

Kek, the difference between rape and sex is your mood.

He invited the boy over because he had planned this from the start -_-
>trips doe

True, and that was certainly something I was not in the mood for.

Yea - shit happens

Stories like this are why I come to this shitty site

>not even up for debate
it's not your place as a girl to say something is not up for debate. i wouldn't even want to bondage you. i'd be fine with even talking to you about it until i thought i had a way to take you through it. just don't tell me i can't and so limit me by your stupid female ideas so you never grow and i never get any satisfaction from helping you and feel like man doing so. you thinking you know better than me would be extremely annoying.

I fucked my wife in the ass last night and my dick was clean. Why? Because she took a dump and used an enema after.

Fucking amateur.

Anal feels awesome but if she doesn't clean herself out properly you get shit all over your dick.

>stick to vaginas m8

Both methods work. You can do a short prep if you're going to fuck immediately after.

If there's going to be some time before fucking , you'll need a longer prep.

I've fucked 4 different girls in the ass (one being my ex who loved anal every time we fucked) and the most I got on my dick was a slick gel (probably a combination of lube and ass fluids) and a tiny piece of shit that I just wiped away after putting my dick back in. Sounds kind you just fucked a messy asshole. The girls I fucked always did a thorough job of cleaning it though before we banged. I would always cum inside and enjoy the sound of them farting out my cum afterwards. Enjoy it OP. Shit dick is the way of the future

reddit.com/r/yxesxxx/comments/4wt10i/two_stepsisters_have_fun_with_stepbro/

Kek'd and chek'd (nice dubs)

Nice to see some positivity instead of being shit on all the time.

word

Another guy here, playing with ass for 5 years+ now, gone through all trial and error

What you do is clean out your colon - which works fine 99% of the time if you are not taking gigantic things and will do the act in the next horu or so.
With that said I have no idea why you'd want to keep probing your ass with a finger for shit.
Touching shit is exactly what we want to avoid here.

No need to put a liter of water in there - but you can actually, without much problems.
What the other guy does is an actual full enema, it takes a few tries and it cleans you out deep and completely.
It takes me around 20~ minutes, 30 tops. But with that you are clean for the next 4-8 hours depending on when you ate last.

All of this ofcourse depends entirely on your diet, a nice clean diet can get you crystal clear in 5 minutes, 10 for the deep cleaning.
Eating a lot of crap foods can let you pump 5 liters through your innards over an hour and you'll still be shitting muddy water.

All in all the unhealthy aspect comes from doing this too often - every day or so - essentially "keeping too clean" in there is bad because it kills the bioflora of your innards.

>When the bait is real and I only realize it now
>also I'm not a girl

>tfw people are complaining about poopdick
I love getting my dick soiled! It isn't proper anal if she doesn't lose control of her bowels.

But hey! We're all different!

Has happened to me multiple times, but wasn't covered.

not bait. being in a relationship with a guy means letting him do what he thinks is best.

same for me

>All in all the unhealthy aspect comes from doing this too often - every day or so - essentially "keeping too clean" in there is bad because it kills the bioflora of your innards.
This.
I used to have problems with my digestion, back in my younger days when I worked in a brothel specializing in butt stuff.

>tfw no matter how hard I try I can't feel bad for you

Its like you don't know anyone of your friends or fuckbuddies, like they are casual acquaintances like the fucking mailmen or something, thats how little insight you have on who they are - and if you go into a fucking "bind me down and have sex with me" situation with people like this its really just reaping what you sow

Maybe it was a good lesson in why you should not be a whore and have sex with people you barely know instead.

Again, knew him for 2 years. Do you think mass murder sprees happen because people are too stupid to find out their friend is the mass murder, or do you think its because they're really good at hiding it.

Believe me, I do blame myself for what happened that night. I was stupid, I should never have said yes to the bondage let alone slept with him. I wasn't planning on fucking him, but I got extremely needy and wanted sex bad. That's the only reason I did it.

Don't feel bad for me, I don't.

This. Bondage is not something you should be trying with a casual acquaintance. No trust built there. No wonder you're scared now.

ignore me just wana see who got
>698666666

>I am the cancer

From the sound of things you sound pretty reliant on sex. Would you call yourself a nympho?

Again "2 years" is not a metric of how deep you know someone, which is my point.
The cunt who gone out with here - how many years is that? You don't know here either.

Well I don't feel bad for you, I can't, thats the point. I am glad I'm not a woman though, estrogen seems to make you people retarded.

Tell her to stop stuffing her fat face before doing anal. Also tell her to shower before doing it again. (Bathing together afterwards is also nice).

Sauce on gif?