Nurse here. Ask your stupid medical questions

Nurse here. Ask your stupid medical questions.

Pic unrelated.

I'm 27 and tend to go soft doing intercourse, after 15-20 minutes. What do I do?

tits or gtfo

How do we know you're a real doctor and not some fuck on Sup Forums making shit up?

don't jerk off so much. take l-arginine to improve blood flow to your dick. do some cardio fitness to improve stamina.

I want to join the (US) military but do not want to disclose my medical history. Does the military have any sort of access to my medical records? When asked I plan on just telling them I barely ever went to the doctor.

I'm a guy.

Because I'm legit.

...

Have you ever given head to someone

You need to disclose that shit. If you can't join, sucks for you. Better to be honest about your shit than be a liability.

No.

boy pucci or gtfo

do you ever feel emasculated by the doctors? Or female doctors? Is there any kind of subordination or power thing? thnx

Ok so for a long time when i was little I had an uncle that would come babysit when my parents weren't home. He would always ask to finger my butthole and being a good little kid I would let him. Eventually he started putting objects up there. This went on for a few years with the largest object being one of those big flashlights that take D batteries. My asshole feels pretty loose now that I'm an adult and sometimes when I fart some shit comes out.

Anyway, is it true I can take 2 aleve instead of six tylenol?

Plenty of that here already. I'm actually here to help.

I lied to get ritalin (didnt need, just wanted it, and havent done it in over 3 years). so in pretending to need it I got diagnosed with dumb shit.

i dont think im a liability

I never do. Some doctors have big egos but in the end you're all working on the same shit and trying to help people. It's really nothing.

You can get waivers for a lot of things.

how incestuous is the medical practice, do a lot of doctors marry other doctors or nurses?

You'll likely need a note from your doctor saying you don't need that prescription anymore and you no longer show evidence of ADHD.

No one should be taking six tylenol. If you're having chronic pain issues see your doctor.

I honestly think you're in the clear then, I was imagining you had asthma or diabetes or something.

Who is this in the pic? Dayum.

For a couple of years now I've been getting these "zits?" On my balls they look like zits but they don't have pus and it hurts to touch or pop them so I don't and unlike zits these don't go away very fast(taking months until a new one re appears) is it herpes?

Not a lot, no. At my hospital we're usually so busy working our asses of that we don't have time for personal shit. I'm sure it happens, but def not at my hospital.

Kendra Lust

White dots on the scrotum

Could be ingrown hairs, could be something else. Get it checked out by a physician to be safe. Stop trying to pop them.

Ay doc, I've got one joint in my thumb that hurts when I stress it backwards at all. Can't shuffle cards anymore. Been like this for a couple months but seems to be getting better. Do I have the rheumatism?

I have both internal and external hemorrhoids, is it enough to use suppositories or do i need some ointment too?

Why doesn't cinnamon cure my diabetes. I read online that it does. And so many people keep posting the same type of story to my Facebook wall. Type one diabetes where you can't make insulin, not type two where you are just a fat fucker.
>pic semi related too type two.

can you just fucking tell me if the military has access to that shit. they perform all their own tests and can judge for themselves how fit i am

i already took the asvab and got a fucking 86 so i clearly dont have ADD and am in fact in top 5% of intelligence according to the military entrance exam

I started stretching my foreskin, should i use steroids gel? what brand?

Usually hair follicles. Any pain/discomfort?

Is it more like house greys anatomy or scrubs

Don't you feel like shit when you walk in a patients room and they mistakingly think you are a doctor?

No, they're just there, but I have them like 3 years ago

I don't like doctors OP. I haven't seen one in over 14 years. Been self medicating and smoking weed to relieve pain and get my appetite back . I also have a massive "skin growth" on the side of my leg that looks like an extra pair of nuts I want answers doctor man. Don't refer me to another genocide master.

I have pimples on my dick and balls wat do?

What kind of nurse, whats your cert in.

> top 5%
> of entry
Liability af

forgot the timestamp missy

Depends on your age

Prep H cream is great, I recommend it

Cinnamon won't cure shit. And yes, Type 2 is usually a result of poor diet/exercise

I imagine they'll request medical records. Not in the military so I don't fully know.

i have tiny pimple looking things that go from my sac to my shaft. i forgot the name of them, but do they ever go away? i hate the look of them. they look like this pic

Why should i ask someone pretending to be a nurse on the internet when i have access to free healthcare because i don't live in a 3rd world country ?

So both Prep H cream and suppositories at the same time?

i have the same question. do they look like the pic that i have?

Wash your pustulent warts for fuck sake.

For OP. What do you do exactly? Are you like a specialized nurse or assistant?

Don't go swinging that around, it'll make you sound like a cunt. I got a 98 but when people ask what I got, I just tell them I don't want to talk about it.

The military only knows what you tell them. Legal records they can dig up, especially if you're trying to get clearance to work with classified material. What's problematic is if you don't tell them something and they find out you tried to conceal it, that could count as a fraudulent enlistment and they will dishonorably discharge you.

Just do what your recruiter says.

>nurse in california
You're a dirty spic, aren't you?

got those too, completely normal man
usually there's a hair growing where one is

Why do you even bother with this shit? You really think some anonymous retard can will someone to show their tits? Lol dude

Fordyce Spots (Not OP I just know my dicks)

I scrub my scrotum good in the shower but they are still there

Was it you that suggested we use Mexican immigrants to do the thankless job of writing parking tickets and calling them beaner maids a couple months ago?

because i'm legit

Stop doing that

Scrubs but less funny shit. House in the manner that people are idiots.

You can self-medicate the symptoms all you want but the reality is that you're not treating the cause

RN BSN

You're fine, see above post

Why are you even posting?

Negatory

If it helps, sure. Try to keep your ass as relaxed as possibly, use comfy cushions in all your chairs too. Try to drink enough water / eat enough fruits/veggies so your bowel movements stay soft as well

but will the pimple things ever go away?

Maybe, maybe not. Doesn't matter. Who cares how smooth your balls are anyway?

Fuck do you mean stop, i cant pull it nigger, people told me to strech it regularly

This. I always wondered what EXACTLY a nurse does.

I'm depressed and don't have the energy to improve my life what do I do

My dog does

>Top 5%
> Can't figure out a simple question on his own
>Has to ask Sup Forums

Kys

ok

...

Does this look like it's healing properly/infected?

You're more likely to hurt it by stretching it, just leave it alone, no one cares if you have a foreskin or not.

I work on a floor with medical/surgical cases. I assess, admit, provide medication, provide education, and coordinate care between physicians/therapists/case managers/social workers etc.

If you don't want to go to therapy, try to take a walk outside every day, gradually increase the amount of exercise you receive. Call someone different every day just to talk. Masturbate less.

Google dot net? org? what?

>Masturbate less.
Serious question, why masturbate less?

How do I tell the difference between a skin tag & a genital wart?

Got a bump on the base of my peen. I have a skin tag on my arm. Looks just like it but since it's on my peen I'm wondering.

Is it OK to have a Red Bull before a workout? Mind you, I workout 6 days a week.

looks like properly infected

regards pussy doctor a.k.a. gynegologinist

It's not healing properly but it's not infected, go get some stitches from urgent care

Biggest kek all day

oh, as an addendum
86 just means you did better than 86% of people who took the test that year. So humble yourself as you remember there's still a good 14% above you.

how do i get rid of dots on my penis (im sure they are not a disease or anything just the regular dots but i have a lot of them and some bigger)

I have a few very tiny looking bumps under my penis head

Why does my cock bend to the right? It didn't use to but over time it's bending more, how do it fix it?

How does that pay? And are you happy with your job? Do you plan on "moving up"?

I have a few very tiny looking penis under my bump head

this and checked

>because I'm legit
>no timestamp
Kill yourself nigger.

Can you mix dextrose and dilantin?

i do as well i hope there is an answer. i have like 2 pairs of them

Filename....

Can I take lopressor with a heart rate of 50?

this, we need the cure!

Fuck it, why not.

Just started going out with a girl who, in the past, had an IUD break loose and travel into her uterine wall, requiring removal.

So we got down to business a while back, and she had quite a bit of bleeding. Apparently that just happens every now and then for her ever since it was removed. Not pertaining to her menstrual cycle or anything.

Is... Is that a thing? Fixable? Cause for concern?
Figured its basically just an agitation of the prior wound, but idk if thats something that needs immediate attention

Studies show testosterone gradually increases up to 7 days after orgasm, therefore providing you with more energy. Total NoFap is stupid, but pacing yourself is more beneficial

Skin tags are usually fairly loose, warts are much more firm

Depends on the size of the red bull and how much sugar, but caffeine isn't that bad as a preworkout.

It's because of the way you jerk off

Pays really well here in CA. I'm generally satisfied but I've been doing a lot of night shifts lately which has been getting to me, I prefer days way more. Trying to get a job in the OR during the day full-time atm.

I screenshot all my iPhone pics because you faggots will try to exif data me otherwise

You shouldn't, it'll drop it even lower.

my dick gets dirty fast and im not sure if i have some sort of a fungal infection. theres a lot of smegma and it smells bad and i have to wash it every day after work

is this normal? not STD btw for obvious reason lmao

I forgot to add that they're white in color

That's very low... why would you need lopressor?

>Red Bull-guy here
It's the standard 8.4 FL OZ cans. I often don't even finish the whole can.

>have jock itch
>scratch it
>skin becomes darkened
>years of different doctors with no change
>what do?

I'm 100% sure that it's fungal but fucking won't go away. Tea tree oil helped but it just comes back.

its STD, you most likely catched it swimming in a pool happens all the time

same here, gonna jack off less

What is this on my ballsack and how the fuck do i make it go away?

I'm an EMT and not sure whether to be a Paramedic or nurse. Main reason I'm looking more towards Paramedic is the autonomy but nursing is way more stable.