If this post is dubs you must confess:

if this post is dubs you must confess:

the weirdest place you've had your penis

Can of Chef Boyardee.

fairly impressive... alright I'll bite, a jar of jelly.

when i was a young teenager I used to rub my knob on dry leafs and blow massive loads

the vag of a mexican cleaning lady from chick fil a

get thread just got

in a bong. was the perfect size too. only got to fuck it once, one of my mates broke it.

Those dubs deserve an answer. I fucked my grandmother's ashes once.

did you use it after?

cum-stained bong water rips jolly good

Once I got an erection solid like stone and my cat was just pasing away and I hit his head with my fucking dick just for the lols

9's nigga

I have a big get boner

When I was younger (around 12), I used to dig holes in pillows, where I'd put my dick in.

...

A cup of jello

You should check yourself for rabies. This advice comes from the heart

no, i used it before. then cleaned it thoroughly, and watched my m8s put their mouths on where i just had my cock. twas great revenge cuz they never chipped in for the weed.

why only once?

In these. Check em

I tried to fuck a balloon. It did not fit, sadly. I also tried to cut a hole in a bar of soap and fuck it. It worked for a bit then it cracked.

i wish it was THOSE FILLED TUBE THINGS why was i not a bright child

...

In a wooden chair. Had gaps in it wide enough for my cock. Felt pretty...

Once I was super bored and I put my dick in an empty apple juice bottle but that's pretty much it

With a word of lie; The weirdest place I've ever had my penis was in a bowl of tomato soup.

Wooden?

fuck.. my down cousin

...

they are now a part of him. absorbed into his being. gram gram has seen some shit now and forever.

You can always buy one at the dollar store.

1. those were waaaaay too tight
2. werent they ice cold?
3. why do you wish it was this item, why, what did you really rape?

Fucked a shampoo bottle when I was 11 or 12. It was a little too small, so I decided to stick it in while flaccid and then work my way up. Regrets-- I've had a few.

Probably the weirdest place would be my own ass, not sure why i did that multiple times

Now I wanna try this out but I feel like if I go to the store and buy one people will totally know what I'm up to

Nigga how

Oh shit, I totally fucked one of these too! After a few times it broke, though.

A wild black bear.

kek

my little sisters belly button


lemme explain. she didnt want the D in the P cause she was scarred ykno? anyway i had the idea of fucking her bellybutton so i did. like anyway who karez i cum anyway lol

Shit.

Yep. Dick in shit. Long story.

lmao bet she smelled like shit

came inside my crush's sandwich

>she ate it

best of days

in your mom.

cheeky fucker

A 14yo also a pineapple

Latex glove. Don't ask.

Which is weirder? A hand or a vagina?

I'm dull

Tell us more

In a freshman when I was a senior

No wait I lied, I also remember masturbating into one of these, which is probably weirder.

u can't c these dubz

Rose bush, the thorns felt great, randomly scratching me here and there, the rain wet leaves tickling the tip of my cock while I fapped as fast as I could, it was in the front yard of my old place, about 3 am. Once the orgasm wore off the scratches itched burned and I never got to do it again because the cold weather stated kicking in and then I moved.

in my hand, im a fuckin weird ass dude

Either have to be a cup of pudding or an eggplant.

weirdest place ive had my penis is on your mind you fucking stranger. go to bed.

a couch, used to 'fuck' that thing back when i was 13, came mostly from carpet burn, it wasn't fun

that's basicly the whole story

Kek

My dick was long enough to put it in my ass? Im not sure, it was more difficult to do it hard than soft as when it's soft it's more stretchy ya know

>699399499
>99 99 99
>999 999
>666 666
OP confirmed for being double satan

in my left hand

Your mom user

Lets see:
Inside of....
A pillow
A tedy bear
...or two.
A bagel (raisin cinnamon)
Banana peel
A couch

Things ive lubed up with:
Peper spray (accidentally)
Toothpaste
Peanut butter
Strawberry jam
Melted popsicle
Icing
Squished banana
Wax
Milk

Weird places ive wacked:
A small stream
RV
Patio in female garb
Church bathroom in female garb

Weird thigs utalized:
Female garb (not too wierd nowadays)
Popsicle up ass
Sharpies (duh)
Starfish
Cat
Rope
Rubber bands
Milk

>Cont.?

an orange

Inside a papaya that I had heated in the microwave.

Later that day my mom asked what hapened to the other half of the papaya... (she knew I didn't like eating them)

kissless or regular virgin?

also fucked many shampoo bottles, and listerine bottles growing up. they dont fit anymore.

i fucked the long pipe attachment on a vacuum about a month ago. washed and lubed b4 hand.

Only regular kek
Wanted to end up like green haired chick in pic related. Never happened but ive got plenty of disgusting/great/kekworthy stories.

My couch.

It was very uncomfortable.

well played, op.

in a trap's ass

My couch.

It was very comfortable.

The holes in the shell of a turtle similar to this

My teachers seat. I cummed all over it too

...

you fucks are weird


story?

I fucked my mattress

>you fucks are weird
THIS IS Sup Forums YOU FUCKING ASSCLOWN NIGGERHIPPIE FOURTWENTYBLAZING SONOFACUNT FAGGOTBOYY

He seems to think me cumming on rose bushes is fine though.

Why aren't you the special one

Faggotgargler

fucked a bass and a jar of marmalade

strangest place: in the fucking woods near a lake

>felt good man
>mfw

did you die?

so you just put your flaccid dick in your ass hole?

>raisin cinnamon

My dick smelled like breakfast for a damn week. It was hell.

so, you accidentally get pper spray on your cock and then decide to use it as lube?

A twinkie

Grandma's house

in my femdog

>she dead now, unrelated

In my dog's mouth

In the soundhole of an acoustic guitar. Steel strings hurt like hell.

check em

Between 2 couch cushions.

doggo

the weirdest place my dick has ever been was Ohio

The mouth of a 50-year old man. It wasn't a great day, but the drugs were alright.

Yeah dude, I also when I was like 15 had adjustable barbells and i took the bar that the weight attaches to and put it in my ass and milked my prostate

my cousin's panties and shoe

In my toilet seat, sitting the other way to jerk it off and then flush it. Easiest way to dispose, but I stopped doing it because I was just dispensing semen, not even close to orgasming.

in my gfz hand while 20-30 church members were sleeping within 2m of us