Me

>Me
>Married dude in shitty house with shitty job
>Suffer from depression
>General piece of shit
>Wife makes me reasonably happy though
>Has a high sex drive
>Fucks me stupid regularly
>Until recently
>She’s been very bitchy
>Don’t know why
>Hasn’t wanted to fuck at all
>This has been going on for 6 weeks at this point
>Call her out on it
>Ask her if she’s fucking someone else
>Gets even more pissed
>Think about an hero frequently
>Finally one night she comes up to me
>Naked
>Want to take a shower with me?
>I almost say know to be a dick but I can tell it’s a peace offering
>Shower with her
>She washes my hair
>Kisses me gently
>We don’t fuck though
Get out of the shower and she asks me to bring her something to wear
>Go to our room and pull out pajamas
>Think better of it and grab a pair of hand cuffs she got from a bachelorette party
>Grab a dog’s leash too
>She reads a lot of those shitty fuckbooks so I’m hoping she’ll be into this
>She blushes
>Really? She asks
>Don’t ask questions. I cuff her and put the leash around her neck
>I lead her naked and wet back to our room and throw her on the bed
>I go to finger her but she’s already very wet
>Holy shit, you’re a dirty whore aren’t you? I don’t even have to warm you up
>She moans
>What should I do about this?
>I blow on her pussy
>Just fuck me, she moans
>I throw a towel over her face and say she doesn’t deserve to look at me
>I penetrate and start going to town
>I flip her over
>I smack her ass
>I pull her hair


Continued

>Then, I realize in horror I have like no stamina
>I really haven’t had the energy to masturbate and she hasn’t been fucking me
>I look around the room to distract me
>Nothing
>My phone is within reach though
>I tell her I’m going to use the pulse of the vibrate to stimulate her more
>I start texting some friends of mine
>We send eachother memes and screencaps from /fit/
>It’s the perfect distraction
>Everytime they text it buzzer and she moans
>I have no idea how long we fucked for but she finally squirts all over me
>I didn’t even know she did that
>I cum all over her back
>The biggest monster load I’ve ever produced
>I make a cock with it and send it to my friends
>I tell them they basically just fucked my wife with me
It’s become a bit of a joke in my circle, but it’s a secret that would probably ruin my relationship with my wife. So, Sup Forums, who here done really debauched shit to someone they care about?

>dubs
M...m-must be true

Lol

Kek, bumping this shit

Sick dubs bruh

kek bois

>be me
>have qt 3.14 gf
>she's been wanting me to jerk off on her
>never do because she can't resist touching
>joke I'll do it when she's sleeping
>she always falls asleep before me
>she falls asleep on the couch
>we didn't fuck that day or the day before
>start cranking my hog
>remember what I said about her sleeping
>decide to go through with it
>blow huge load
>the way she was laying, her face was too far
>end up blowing all over the blanket next to her face
>leave it
>she wakes up five minutes later
>huh? What's all this?
>I'm not sure. Cats made a mess on the blanket maybe?
>she just rolls over and goes back to sleep
>denied it because I missed and didn't want to explain
Not too terrible, but the most debauched thing I've done without her knowledge

Bump
I got one, typing it up

>I missed and didn't want to explain
You shouldve thrown the blanket on her face. Missed opportunity

When I get really horny and haven't gotten laid in a while, I go on the personal ads on craigslist and pretend to be gay so someone will blow me.

>Pretend

Hey, faggot, I said pretend, what of it. It's not like I'm gay because I got my dick sucked. Is it any worse than using a blowup doll or fleshlight?

>pretend

The absolute madman loves playing pranks

>pretend
I guess dubs do lie

>Faggot
This is bait right?
Like you calling me a faggot now, has to be bait

Fucking hell kek, that's a whole new level of desperation

What's bait? How do I do the arrow thing to make it green?

Fucking top kek someone screencap this and include me in it

What hath this thread wrought?

>What's bait?
MFW newfag is really fag

...