Sup Forumsrothers, I need some serious advice

Sup Forumsrothers, I need some serious advice
My parents are going to be gone for the day tomorrow and I was wondering...
What is the best way to open a wine bottle, drink a little bit of the contents inside (Just enough to get a buzz, and put it all back as if nothing ever happened?
Wine bottle looks exactly like pic related.

drink the lot smash the bottle and say you were looking for something and dropped it

Wouldn't work, tried that before and been caught.

idk how to seal it back up but you could take like 1/3 of it and then fill it back up with water

I'm guessing the mods don't ban for underage anymore...

What kind of dumbass underage question is this?

Haha, are you fucking ten or something?

OP here, That... Might work...

It's pretty fucking noticeable if you mix alcohol with water.

Nah, been here since 2008. Never thought to ask this question though.

Where has Sup Forums come to...

Fuck I hate millennials.

Are you fucking 8 Jesus christ

not wine

Yes... yes it is. What kind of pisswater whine are you drinking?

Go out and buy your own wine faggot. If you can't, then you're not old enough to post here anyway.

I don't believe you for one second you underage retard.

dont start drinking under age you fucking retard. all youre gonna keep doing is pushing that thresh hold and you're going to grow up like everyone else whos full of shit but fakes it

You don't have to believe me bud. You act like I'm asking for your approval or something.

Go to the shop and buy your own fucking wine you leach.

Well seeing as you're on here trying to figure out a way to sneak in some drinks past your parents, I think you are.

Just fucking open it and drink it you stupid underage shit. What are they going to do? Yell at you?

MODS get rid of this Underage fag

Jesus Christ alright.

Drink the whole fucking thing or go out and steal a bottle super easy or better yet find a homeless man to by a 40oz for you faggot

now you really sound 17
choke yourself out or something

You still sound about 16.

Anyway, the real trick is to make rocket fuel by mixing a little bit from the top of all your parent's liquor bottles. Mix it with juice or something if you have to.

Screw the wine and just search for your parents' heroin stash

Just ask someone older or homeless to buy you alcohol with you and they are allowed to buy themself an beer or anything else cheap too. Don't drink your parents alcohol because they sure drink more expensive stuff.

The trick of a eine bottle once open u can't seal again

Why the fuck do you have to drink wine? Go buy yourself a bottle or go to somewhere you can have it served to you.

What you ask for is impossible to happen without them noticing.

Maybe you could drink a bit, add back the amount you drank but in water, and break the bottle with the content inside. That way you can say you made an accident, and they will have to buy a new one.

You can't you faggot. The cover that is over the cork is shrink wrapped on, to even remove the cork you would have to cut off the cover.

God you're such a stupid faggot. Why the FUCK would a person even want to drink "a little" wine? It will have no effect on you, it isn't fucking 160 proof liquor.

Qualifications: wine enthusiast, home wine maker who bottles his own shit to the same level of quality as professional wineries.

He's obviously underage. Any wine suggestions?

Night train

Try some Black Stump if you're getting into reds.

I especially like red.

Damn the underage isn't even trying to hide it these days.

Buy a new one yourself.

>legitimate underage b8
>no ban

What the fuck are the mods up to?

Sage and ignore

Me too. Aussie Shiraz or Cabernet is what I usually buy, but Malbec is also decent.

If you're looking for recommendations; try out Steeple Cock, Daisy and the Tamborine Man, Waxed Bat and Dark Corner.

I won't recommend the following. Educational purposes only. Put a spoon of bread yeast into a big bottle of apple juice. Loosen the lid. Put a balloon over the lid to seal the bottle from air. Poke a TINY hole in the balloon with a sowing needle. The yeast will eat the apple sugar. It will make lots of co2 bubbles and alcohol. The balloon will inflate and let out gas through the tiny hole. This keeps the cider airtight and sterile. The co2 will fill all of the space in the bottle and push out the oxygen. Just put the bottle in your closet and AWAY FROM SUNLIGHT. When the bubbles stop, you've got your very own bottle of apple cider. You can open it early too, but the longer it goes, the more alcohol is made. You could use any other kind of juice, but apple juice is a safe easy choice that is likely to "just work without trying" the easiest. It wont make noise or smell. Bread yeast is safe and will just make a crappy but technically correct and completely functional apple cider.

Fuck off, kid. Hold your breath if you want a buzz.

no you asshole i'd rather my dumbass kid drink the whole fucking bottle than drink a little bit and then ruin the rest

not on OP's side, he's a retard with an alcohal problem, but. you can be 18 which is the age you can post on 4chin and not be 21- old enough to buy alcohol in the USA

Rather than some big dumb ass story like "hurdurr I broke it and no smell or sticky mess idek!" perhaps you should consider that (unless expensive) they have bigger things going on than remembering what's in their wine cupboard. Take whole bottle, throw away at neighbor's house.

Stop trying to steal shit and just make some pruno.

Google is your friend.

Grow and smoke cannibis faggot

Nope, this twelve year old faggot sounds like he's trying to sneak around and not get caught. OP will literally get grounded and have his wiiu taken away if he gets caught. 18 year olds don't have to worry about being grounded even if they're under the drinking age.

You have plenty of time to drink all you want when you are older and can buy your own.

take a syringe with long needle and suck it out from bootle