Dumbest shit you did drunk

Dumbest shit you did drunk

>Thought it was a good idea to do a headroll on concrete
>Friend made sure i'd bend my knees before doing it
>Headache for two days and managed to sprain my wrist

cucumber

>fucked my best friends wife
>for about half a year

Loads of self harm. Ended up in the hospital multiple times.

>Broke a bottle of Jim Beans to chew on the glass
>Kicked fence over
>Set fire to strangers yard
>Left party to wonder the streets
>Went to Mexican joint and asked if they only served Mexicans
>Got picked up by cops
>Dropped off at home
>Yelled at by father
>Father goes outside to garage to smoke a joint
>Leave and wonder down a highway with a garden hose attacking cars as they drive past me because I'm sure they're aliens
>Break into some guys' garage and look for alien killing supplies
>Pass out on bench in garage
>Guy comes out of house to ask wtf
>Turns out the guy is someone I know from school
>Warn him about the aliens
>Leave and walk up highway back toward house
>Sister finds me
>Refuse to get in her car
>Sister hits me with car
>Dad gets out of car and insists I go him
>Tell him to fuck off
>Go home and pass out
>Wake up sober and only remember about half the shit I did

That was not a fun night.

dayum, what did you drink, Lsd?

There was some cocaine and weed thrown into the mix, but no hallucinogens sadly.

Atleast you saved your highschool buddy from the aliens

snorted a ramen seasoning packet
followed by chugging a 12 oz bottle of habanero hot sauce
followed by brushing my teeth with icy hot

coincidentally, worst hangover ever

True and he never thanked me for it that son of a bitch.

>knocked up your mom
>then you happened

>pissed out of my dorm window
> dorm conciërge saw it, decided to handle it silently by sending me an email
> Email I gave at the beginning of the semester was my mom's

>Drink to much
>I go home with my bicycle
>have great a great idea
>Lets kick soms trees while cycling
>I felt because I kicked the tree to hard
>felt right on my head
>head was bleeding
Never again.. This was 2 weeks ago

>be drunk on a friday night
>notice a thread. OP had sex with a ten year old.
>as it happens I investigate child abuse.
>notify moot.
>moot contacts pd
>I get the report from pd
>ruin the bastards life.
Oh whoops that wasn't dumb at all.

>fucked a butterface that was in love with me, took almost a year to get her to fuck off and leave me alone after that

>Be highschool sophmore
>senior friend invites me to senior halloween party
>ohcool.jpeg
>get piss drunk
>friend says hit on grill wearing cop costume
>"Arrest me miss ive been a bad boy"
>tfw her boyfriend is a college football player
>he wasnt there
>wewlad.jpeg

>Party at my house
>Shitisabouttoend.rec
>Drunk as shit
>Go outside to take a piss
>Find my white thrash neighbor lurkin around
>Invite him inside
>The guy says oh cool yeah mofoka let's party
>He starts hitting on every girl left, even my wife
>Wife says 'user wtf why did you let in this asshole'
>Try to kick him out
>Fucker says 'It's cool yo' I'll be good
>Relax and pass out on my bed
>Wake up to the sound of my wife crying
>What the fuck happened sweetie
>Turns out everybody left and she was alone trying to make white thrash neighbor leave the house
>She says he became super agressive, ended up raping her on the living couch
>I get angry at her and tell her I don't believe her
>Really if I say something to him he could easily beat the shit out of me

absolute madman

That's bad luck. The guy tried to help you and just made it much worse.

> 2008 be 19 years old 6'5" 230lbs
> Given older brother's state I.D. (Lost his Licence due to D.U.I.) when he got his license back.
> Picked up two 40's of King Cobra, one for chuggin' one for sippin' while cruising dirt roads.
> Out of 40's pick up two more, both were sippin'.
> About 50 Miles away from starting point all on dirt roads, I'm more than lost at this point.
> Meet buddy at bar drink two schooners of Labbat's
> Give buddy ride home while taking bong rips on the freeway.
> Get Kicked out of Wal-Mart (Obviously really fucked up, tried to buy a cardboard microwave display as a joke)
> Drop off buddy
> 2 miles from home need to vomit
> Park at a dirt road intersection and proceed to puke my brains out at about 2:50 in the morning.
> Wake up to a truck blaring it's horn at roughly 4 a.m. with my feet outside of the open door and some bile on my shoes.
> Car running the whole time, low on gas and fumed it home.

moot

Ha ha ha, that's embarrassing, ask your wife if his dick was stinky.

I don't know what I did but I woke up nude in my sister's bed and she wouldn't talk to me for a week.