Nordic history thread

This thread is made for the discussion of Nordic history, a history of which Sweden was very clearly the stat at.

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*the star at

Here is every combination of your flags.

Not quite. Iceland has old Nordic history, Sweden has classical Nordic history and shares modern Nordic history along with Norway.

True, but we won most of it in the end. Except the 21st century

Cool chart. Though it doesn't factor in the flag designs with different colours in the top and bottom fields, though those have only so far been suggestions.

Sweden is the devil confirmed.

Also give back Jemtland and Herjedalen we will trade you some brownskins or something.

You guys ruined Kalmar Union with your petty Engelbrekt rebellion, nice one.

Noice

You get all clay except bohuslän+Some of our brownskins, deal?

Dey oppressed us, we had to break free

>Engelbrekt
Best name there is. That and Valdemar. Way too few people get those names, and most that do are Danes. Such a shame.

This is the best Nordic flag.

If you have to steal the rose of Lippe, at least get the color right.

>Nordic history
>rape, steal and raid other peoples
>get Christianized
>be simple peasants for several hundred years
>fight each other for no reason
>embrace Luther's autism
>fuck German states up for no reason
>we empire now
>fight each other for no reason
>give up fighting and imperialism
>enjoy high living standards and welfare
>become uncultured metrosexual sissies

WE

>uncultured

But you still do have a culture, all those jungle-monkeys and sand-monkey should make that very clear...

THE

That's it, wrapped up quite nicely.

there is not distinctive cultural difference between Denmark and e.g. the Netherlands, Belgium, the UK. All western countries have become the same alcoholic, atheistic, americanized shitholes.

NOOOOOOOORTHERN

>Finn non-Scandinavian agrees on a negative pessimistic summary of scandinavian history
Surprise

>distinctive cultural difference between Denmark and e.g. the Netherlands, Belgium, the UK.

ZWARTE PIET

Speak for yourself, we still watch Donald duck on christmas and dance around a phallic object during midsummer

>Donald duck
>not americanized

BRÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖÖDER

I'd still like to see americans dancing around a green dick singing napoleonic-era propaganda songs though...

...

> For Captain Cuckold enjoys living in the past, it makes him less anxious about his life in 21st century Sweden.

...

>For khan pekka enjoys historical revisionism, it makes him less anxious about his country's lack of historical significance .

>your city
>does your local zoo have finns?
reykjavíik no but there have been talks about getting a pair

Probably, finns were the poles of the 20th century, coming over here in spades to be used as cheap laborforce.

>alcoholic, atheistic, americanized shitholes
He's right, except for the shitholes bit. Atheistic and Americanized are the two things I most associate with Sweden.

Pretty much everyone is, no need to hate your country for that. It's the effect of globalism

What do you have in the Reykjaviik zoo? All the leftover eunuchs from the dick museum?

>globalism
Not a real thing. You're thinking of the phenomenon globalization.

Yes, pretty much everyone has merged with a "western culture", It's not Sweden specific

All western and many eastern countries

it's pretty unexciting desu
sheep, horses, cows, reindeer, foxes, minks, seels, a bunch of birds, pigs, and a handful of lizards, snakes and bugs
the seels are the only thing worth seeing imho

Is Finland's claim of being oppressed legitimate? From what I've been able to gather, Swedish peasants were treated just as poorly as Finnish.

>McDonalds
Implying it's not the most boring place on earth. At least burger king built a bastu in Finland.

Really hope you get your pair of Finns there.

Yeah, seels are dope.

I rarely leave the house so the country doesn't affect me much desu
there's no mcdonalds or burger king though

Do you have kebabpizza?

Yeah, but that's Denmark, meaning you, not us.

Swedes don't know anything about actual history, prime example this pic:

quiet

no, we don't have that many turks or syrians here

are the faroes really that insular? what he said definitely applies to us

Nonono, u were oppressed right? And just as advanced as us when we came to you

is it true that many balkanites and romanians migrate to scandinavian countries with fake italian IDs?

I will admit some wrongdoing on Swedens part during our shared history. We were kind of dicks, or at least our leaders were. I'm sorry :( I hope we can still be friends?

i hope russia annexes finland again, or anyone except us
finland is just a bother

romania is part of the EU so they can travel all over yurop however they like

balkans came here during 80s-90s, not so much now

Are you not? Of course we're catching up to modern times like everybody else, but we're still keeping our cultural traditions, some of which spark quite a bit of controversy in other countries.

Neither oppressed nor advanced, doing just fine.

And Swedes didn't bring anything but Lutheran cuckoldry with them. Some deity only knows what heights we may have reached without Swedes oppression.

>nor advanced
That's all relative. Swedes weren't advanced either.

We knew how to write and didn't worship pagan gods like you did.

First you named you not being oppressed, but ends up mentioning "swedish oppression", how will you have it?

Correction: the Swedish royalty were Christian because it gave them political connections to the south.

we still hunt whales and eat smoked lamb for christmas but I think calling us another Americanized, atheistic country is broadly accurate

Pretty much everyone in the country stopped their viking beliefs in mid-12th century

Rehearse your reading comprehension. First paragraph is clearly about life pre-Swedish Empire.

>stopped
As in, they either stopped worshipping the non-official gods or stopped being alive.

Because it gave you political influence in south, just like said.

Bullshit, we had enclaves of infidels up until the 19th century. Where I lived people still carved curse-runes on their neighbors' houses in the industrial era.

Lol bullcrap. It went on quite a bit longer among the peasants. They would secretly go into the forest to do that kind of stuff until the priests found out.

So sad! You, who were the best of us... :(

I don't even need to read the thread, I just know there's some shit flinging going on

The same shit that has been gone through for countless amount of times

Every single time you mention swedish history, It's fucking pathetic

Increasingly atheistic, sure, but the Americanization is still far from the point of eliminating notable cultural differences.

Oh, I don't think it's gone quite THAT far anywhere yet. At least nowhere where english wasn't the primary language already.

Swedes are among the first snowniggers that got civilized, so they tend to be overly arrogant because of it

Nevertheless, Meds have the greatest history in Europe, and arguing about something that have nothing to do with you or the present day people is kinda silly imho

> American, lecturing about history.

Why is our flag in the same picture with all those other flags?

>arguing about something that have nothing to do with you or the present day people is kinda silly
Whatever else is culture and history for, then?

Not until your countryman stops posting this autism

Yo listen up here's a story
About a little autist that lives in a funlands basement
And all day and all night and everything he sees
Is just yellow like him inside and outside
Yellow his house with a yellow little window
And a yellow corvette
And everything is yellow for him and himself
And everybody around
'Cause he ain't got nobody to listen to

Yellow like the golden blonde hair, feels good.

lad lads
we have quite the interesting missing person case going on greenlandic fishermen are suspected

yes what was that, we apparently dispatched triton for something

literally can't sit down anywhere without hearing people talking about it
Yes the frigate was supposed to meet it halfway or something, think it was going west anyways

What language is spoken in Greenland? How fast are their internet connections?

Greenlandic and Danish. im guessing shitty satellite internet only

greenlandic and danish
I have played GTA online with some, fast enough for that I guess

WE

>no mcdonalds or burger king though

So... how do I live there?
My prerequisites are; white, BA degree, and I have a good relationship with my father.

Can I come?

How wacky is their danish accent? Never met a person from Greenland. Also, what's greenlandic like? Is anything like other scandi languages?

>Is anything like other scandi languages?
lmao no
I don't speak a word of danish(AND PROUD OF IT) so I don't know about their danish

greenlandic
youtube.com/watch?v=lke7xx4AQRE

their accent is actually very subtle, but they do learn early in life

rumors they have landed police on the trawler. Wouldn't surprise me if their was a prison cell on the ship. My uncle worked on a icelandic trawler with an african crew and they had a cell in case one of them chimpedout
actually was used once. One of the niggers killed another nigger

mbl.is reported 15 minutes ago that a body was found near Hafnarfjörður where her shoes were found and her phone was last turned on
unconfirmed if it's accurate

HDMS Triton pursued the ship and it has been turned back to Iceland

eskimos are subhumans desu

>eskimos are subhumans desu
tru

hello my nordic brothers

you need to get hired by an Icelandic company and then you can get a residency permit
so if your skills are in demand you can probably come since there's more of a labor shortage than an unemployment problem

>in case one of them chimpedout
>actually was used once

USA USA USA USA

The babes want me so much, there's not enough me to go around.
Im in demand as fuck, when can I start?

update no body was found in the area

why haven't you civilized greenland yet?

>why haven't you civilized greenland yet?
we did, but then they realized life is suffering