This guy walks up and slaps your girlfriends ass, what do you do about it?

This guy walks up and slaps your girlfriends ass, what do you do about it?

walk the fuck away because thats the fucking reem and can potentially wreck the absolute shit out of me in a matter of seconds

Yell for help

Call 911?

pull out my sawed off shotgun and blow his chest open like a doom monster

Call Brock

shoot it.

Aim for the head and pray for the knockout.

I will amir kahn his ass because im edgy as fuck

360 walk up to him and ask for autograph

That aint even an image of him at his peak, Überream

>Pretend to want to lick his asshole
>FOUR FINGERS OF A THOUSAND DEATHS

Smash his skull in with my 1.2m truck breaker bar, what else would I use it for

my girl? bitch he'd have two girls after that. i'd become his girl

>Shoot him
>Trust me.
>I'm a cop
>My name is Detective John Kimble

Get on my phone and show him a bunch of videos of him getting KO'ed back when he was at 205. Then I'd show him videos of getting KO'ed at heavyweight too.

I begin to photograph the action

Punch him in the throat, knee him in the balls. Continue to pound at his throat if I am able.

slap his girfriend's ass, if she's not there, slap his mother's ass, if she's not there, slap his sister's ass, if she's not there, slap his dog's ass, if she's not there, slap his ass.

slap my girlfriend's ass harder than he did.

I would shoot for a double leg and lie on top of him for 15 minutes

Overoid beat Brock silly

You'll do fookin nuttin

suck his dick

Shoot him. It's not like he's bullet proof.

...

Sup mah nigga
That's it.

...

I've never wanted to cheat on you more than today. Yesterday was the most selfish thing you could've ever done in our sex life. I mean I gave you a BLOWJOB while you were running low level dungeons in WoW for fucks sake. THEN, I gave you a SECOND blowjob twenty minutes after that one. Only that time, you actually tried to have sex with me for 3 seconds before pulling out and saying "theres no way I can continue- finish me off in your mouth." So I did, and look at what that got me.

Two months without sex, two blowjobs FOR FREE, and now I'm going on month 3 without you making me cum. This is my fucking life now, so thank you for being a fucking dick for the last 2 years.

Kick his bf in the nuts..

Call USADA.

go to my car get my nine and put one in his ass

You're welcome. Now start sucky sucky!

And thank you for the wonderful experience of crying myself to sleep every night. Tons of fun watching you lie there, pretending not to notice.

>gf
>Sup Forums
>kys faggot

drug free baby

>360 walk out
>get Brock Lesnar
>360 walk back
>watch Brock Lesnar get smacked

ever heard of guns?

probably get fucked up after cursing him out

shoot my school up

Quick one, two to his jaw. He aint shit.

Jokes on him, I don't have a girlfriend. That strong boy can deal with inconveniencing someone else. Hope he had a nice day though

fucking nigger lover

Was this before or after the steroids?

I'd tell him to back the fuck off, or else.

Diverticulitis Brock yes... Roided New Brock maybe different

*adjusts tie* excuse me kind sir, but your actions are unappreciated here and my qt pie and I would like an apology you shrunken dick Mongoloid. No offense kiddo.

>headbutt him in the nose
>feed a few shots while hes still phazed
>get fucking destroyed
>wake up in hospital with broken bones but not a total cuck

you really wanna play that game?

Read him the collection of short stories from MostlyHetero's wattpad, specifically Michael and the Sex Goblin. And then I fuck his butt since he turned gay and leave my girlfriend and just be with that guy.

Dude eats horses for dinner

Look at her face immediately afterwards. She should know how to handle herself by now, and if she looks disgusted I'll know she's not into it and fixing to do something herself.

If she looks pleased, I dump her and give him her number on my way out the door.

...

kick his ass, and then fuck her in front of this guy. just to mark my territory

...

>gf pulls gun on him
>sit back and kek

also slap her ass and say "good right?"

Throw some fried chicken onto the floor
The bait is set...
He will proceed to bend over and pick it up with his mouth
Queue: throw sand in his eyes, pull trousers down revealing a fully erect and throbbing phallus, a swift thrust into his anus
Victory
Walk away a champion

nice

feed him to my pigs

Slightly touch his Glass jaw and watch him fall into that gentle goodnight

After man. I mean, he was a light heavyweight like 10 years ago. Then suddenly Overeem turned inte Ubereem.

He is from the netherlands tho, so don't know if the whole KFC/purple drank thing works.

Then get Easter island head

this tbh

wat

kill him with kindness

Joke's on him, I'm bi

I slap HIS ass, tenderly~

>be nick diaz
>be out with my gf
>some random porch monkey approaches us
>slaps my gf's ass with his ebola hand
>looks me dead in the eyes
>"what u gon do ho?"
>be as i am a total fagget and a cuck i swallow his harambe cock and loose to a filthy potato nigger like a complete bitch.

get down and suck him off right a true tolerant swede would

pic related my waif's strapon

Nothing, but my trap girlfriend fucks him in the ass to assert dominance.

Hes on steroids..

...

stick a pin in his fucking steroid arms

I show him my boypussy

▲
▲ ▲

he wouldn't be around with all these gats.
ya know, with all the cops hungry for that black meat

> Say holy fuck its Overeem!
> Talk about his career
> Go to a training session with him

Act insane

first chek how big is his dick, then suck.

Say, "Hey Alistair, I knocked you out at Mike's twice. Do you want a repeat of that?"

/thread basically

try it cunt, see what happens

Everyone knows he can't take a punch. a gust of wind and he does the chicken dance

Shoot him in face because I live here.

Gently tap a finger against the uberreem's chin. He'll fall over. He always does.

tell him she has a penis

>she
>penis
>gtfo fagget

OK. . .

Say im a huge fan and ask If I could blow him... id give him my gf anyday.

thats a bitch move, takes less balls then a guy with back up

Glass him

Suck his dick and bend over for a good time. While I'm getting plowed wonder why I had a girlfriend.

This

underrated post.

just look at dat boi craving cock.

show me a girl who would do the same?

I've had it rougher.

That's was edgy. Too sharp to me

Catch him off guard, flying side kick his knee out and run. If I miss or fail at making his knee bend in the totally wrong direction I will already be on the move.

scrap her off the wall

ask the police to kill him