Riddle time:

Riddle time:

Standing up or sitting down, it doesn’t like to be caught or found.

Piss?

my dad

An user makin' mischief :)

Nope

New hint:

The longer it hides, the less you’ll see it.

The longer it’s used, the less have of it.

whats the fucking answer?

Pokemon

Time

Niggers

......a shadow?

soap

Sex probably. Or bagina.

A boner

next riddle please

How about a boat?

What tells monstrous lies has dead crocodiles eyes is hungry but not for money the power of the people is this creatures steeple???

Trump, NEXT!

sorry its Hillary Clinton

Penis.

...

As you wish. I go up but not down if you look up i can be found

>I go up but not down
It definitely isn't your mother

Clouds?
Steam?

a flashing light in the sky as you watch me go by?

...

Yes, this. I don't care if it wasn't the answer, it makes sense, it was well memed, I declare this the answer.

...

Another hint I shine rays from space to spy on the human race?

Alright, I'll share one my old professors used to tell.

>There are eight pills.

>One pill weighs slightly more than the others, and is poisonous. The other seven pills do nothing.

>You have a balance scale, and you may use it only twice, after which you must eat seven of the pills.

>How do you survive?

"What weighs six ounces, sits in a tree and is extremely dangerous?"

Is it a satellite? I thought that was too obvious so I didn't say it.

Obama

A hollow coconut filled with Nitroglycerin.

Me masturbating?

You are right

A canary with a machine gun.

>weigh four and proceed if heavier
>weigh two and proceed if heavier

Take 50% chance

how?

kek

a snake

I'll give you a hint. Your first weigh in should have three on each side, not four.

This one is actually easiest if you set it up as an equation.

Hot air

correct

A shadow

Love this one, do you know the more complicated version?

16 pills, you dont know if the poisonous is heavier or lighter, you can use the balance scale 3 times.

Took me 2 weeks to figure this one out

>a 2 ounce bird with a 4 ounce machine gun

what is LOve?

No, never heard that one, but now it will bug me until I solve it!

weigh three on each side. if evenly balanced consume those 6, then weigh final two,
If uneven balance two from the heavier pile. if those two are even the final one is known poison, if not, the poison one is heavier.

Shitting or pissing?

Here's another good one, this one with a fair bit of word play.

>You're in cement room that has no windows or doors, and no vents.

>You have a mirror and a block of wood.

>How do you escape before you suffocate?

Baby don't hurt me

Break the mirror with the wood block, then suicide with the mirror shards

best of luck friend :)

Got it in one my meaty friend!

You first look in the mirror and see what you saw, take the saw and cut the wood in half, two halves make a hole, jump through the hole and you're out.

ty google

Well I suppose that's one way to do it, though there is a version of this where you live.

Hint: It's about wordplay, not realistically escaping.

Breath

DON'T BE GOOGLING THIS SHIT, FLESHBAG, OR YOU DEFEAT THE PURPOSE OF THE THREAD

Weigh six pills, three on each side. If balanced, eat the seventh pill. If not, take heavier three pills, place one on each side. If balanced, eat the third pill. If not, eat heavier pill. An hero achieved.

>I am long, but short

>I am hard, but soft

>I am used often, yet never touched by hand.

>I am not your dick. Just to be clear, since that's always the first answer.

Life?

breathing?

Shooting star?

Your dick

water?

does the scale show the weight of the things on it
and whats the weight of the pills

fishes my precious

this.

That riddle's answer is fucking retarded. Also, Google is cheating.

A horsecock.

It's just wordplay buddy, a lot of riddles work that way. I know it can hurt when you don't get a riddle, but don't worry buddy, you'll get the next one, I'm sure!

I can't believe someone actually got this. I was just scrolling down the front page when I saw the fur thread, and thought, "I can make a riddle out of this,"

A balloon

To the North I am short.

To the South I am long .

To the West I no longer go.

To the East I've never been.

I am an animal, yet I walk alonside men.

I am a man, yet I walk alongside gods.

I am a god, yet I walk alongside animals.

I am _____ .

Kangz

I am Batman.

...

a fag

It's batman!

Yes, I wasn't sure if anyone would get that one!

An animal? A bat, duh.

A man? Bruce Wayne.

A god? The dude has survived fights with Darkseid and Superman.

Come on man, no one who speaks english for a first language is going to get that one.

who ?

I sincerely hope you're serious. If you don't know about harambe, don't learn, it's one of the dumber memes we've ever had.

When set loose
I fly away,
Never so cursed
As when I go astray.

2 in a corner
1 in a room
0 in a house
1 in a shelter.

What am I?

Make a magical statue out of the wood by rubbing it against the wall.
Use the magical statue to enchant the mirror, turning it into a portal.
Use portal to get out.

Women

It's fucking X you dip shit

Dead hookers

A robot.

The wooden statue is a penis.
The statue enchants the "mirror" or female
the portal is a vagina. The baby comes out.

Batman really was the answer for that one.
kek, but no.
I mean, yeah, sort of. Not the original answer I had in mind, but hey, 1/2 a point for you.

Already been solved. See

don't worry about it user

The letter "R"

Trips and truth, what more can you ask for? Good job user.

Your nut sack?

The following is an English word that we've all seen, but with six letters added. What is the word? (if you've seen this one before, don't answer, leave it for the people who haven't to figure it out).

BSAINXLEATNTEARS

Here's one, though I suspect OP would know it,

This thing all things devours:
Birds, beasts, trees, flowers;
Gnaws iron, bites steel;
Grinds hard stones to meal;
Slays king, ruins town,
And beats high mountain down.