Autism greentext thread, I'll start

Autism greentext thread, I'll start

>be me, 14, freshman year
>live 15-20 minute walk from school, this is important, remember this for later
>super cynical and kind of a dick, but still pretty calm and chill
>befriend a senior, call him Bill
>Bill already has a car, and a decent amount of stable income
>i skip constantly not because i hated school (i did) but because i would be super tired after all-nighters on vidya
>ask Bill before 1st hour if i can take his keys and sleep in his car until 6th hour and he would drive me home (we were very good friends by now)
>he says yes ofc, take his keys, walk outside by one of the doors people can walk out of without being caught
>in car
>aloneatlast.mp4
>fall asleep finally


cont ?

Cont

Cont

Oh for chrissakes, don't ask just tell the fucking story. Wtf.

Cont

Cont

you made the thread
you know what to do

chekem

Tits or get the fuck off

on it.

>sleeping in front seat with radio on and sitting up
>one of the tardguards who came in late that day noticed me in the parking lot alone sleeping in his car, obviously skipping
>i was still asleep until rudely awoken by knocking on the window
>wake up, heart absolutely racing and freaking out
>dont know what to do
>refuse to look at her and shes trying to talk but Rage Against the Machine on 22/50 volume is drowning her out
>she realizes that im not going to listen to her
>she tries to pull a fat old lady jog to the school sheriff office or principle or some shit in the building
>know that Bill has 2 sets of keys
>fuckit.jpg pull keys out, throw under seat, text Bill and lock the keys inside without getting a text back confirming that he knew I would leave the keys in the car
>fucking dip out of the parking lot, by the lower schools and on the road to my house
>get a text like 2 minutes into the walk
>its bill
>"dude I dont have my keys, my dad took them when I got my windshield fixed and hes working"
>his dad would leave for 5-6 days at a time for work
>start freaking out worse
walking home, see car pass, its my moms friend on her way somewhere in her car


cont ?

>tits or gtfo

Are you retarded?

Checked trips and yes cont. Always cont. Sup Forums loves stories.

are you underage?

School should be starting soon. You should get into a healthy sleep habit.

cont.
>i stab myself and die because i am stupid and type really slow and my stories are lame

I like where this is going, please do.

im not typing slow, im just talking to friends m9

I'm going to die of old age before op finishes...

step up the fucking game then

that must be nice

kek'd heartily

i concur

The unwritten rule of/b/ is you have no friends but Sup Forums when you are op. If you have friends other than Sup Forums, you don't make threads to waste Sup Forums's time.

Abandoning thread, op is a faggot.

Another unwritten rule
ALWAYS PRETYPE GREENTEXTS, FAGGOT

Only if you join me

and yes, your asshole will be plunged

Basically

OP hasn't abandoned this thread. Tyron came by and needs his mouth.

OP will be right back.

walking home was a stupid idea and i dont know why i did it, i felt badass for a minute until i saw my moms friend and it was her best friend who she talks to every day so my chances of getting out of this are literally 0 if she saw me

>car passed
>fuckfuckfuckfuck.jpg
>start walking faster but not running to draw attention to myself since i have a backpack on
>getting more texts
>bill
>"? dude are you in the office?"
>"what happened? its almost 6th hour i need my keys I have to drive (girlfriends name) to work"
>ignore him until i can get home and think of something
>the school shouldnt be able to call my mom since i blocked their number on her, and our home phones
>15 minutes of dread pass
>home
>go upstairs
>room is torn the fuck up
>see neat pile of stuff on my desk
>rolling papers, lighters, and beer bottles i had hidden under my bed
>freak out worse
>get another text
>mom
>"when you get home from school today you can unhook the playstation and put it in my room and then work on your own room."
>thank god she doesnt know I left school
>phone dies its about halfway through 6th hour now and im sitting on my bed, nearly crying
>mother gets home
>most furious shes ever been and shes a single mother who is very stressed out, so its bad
>cleaning room
>dinner rolls around
>were eating pizza, me, mom, and brother
>mom says
>"user do you still have your phone?"
>dont even reply, hand it to her, dead
>she just scoffs
>we start talking, shes less mad
>DING-DONG
>doorbell
>we all wait and just look around shocked that someones at our house
our front door has a series of small windows next to the door and people look through there when they come to the door usually
>see sheriff
>mom is friends with a lot of local cops, goes and opens door
>principle, assist. principle, Bill and his mom
>ohfuck.png
>whole situation unfolds, i get suspended for skipping and mom has to pay for locksmith for Bills car
>he doesnt even talk to me
>grounded for 6 months

Lel

Jeezus

who gives a flying fuck

6 months later get phone back, unlock it.
13 texts, 6 calls,

read all the texts most of them are like "whats going on" "i NEED my car"

last one reads "I TOLD THE SCHOOL AND I GOT A 10 DAY SUSPENSION FOR LETTING YOU IN MY CAR"

yeah sorry for the last part being late, it took me a bit to type and i was forced to take my dog outside to shit because she started squatting

fuck me

that's the most riveting story ever

goddamn tell us more

I've got one
>be me
>have trouble making eye contact
>have difficulty defending yourself when insulted or abused in public
>everyone knows something is wrong with you the minute you start talking
>you're going to die alone after years of humiliation and pain
>you will see your friends get married and you'll still be "such a good friend" but you'll be alone.
>you want to commit suicide but it would hurt your family too much so you just live with it.
Pretty funny right guys? lol autism is hilarious imo

sorry if you thought it was shitty, i was hoping for other posts as well i want to read others stories too

I need MOAR

I want to shake the next goddamn syllable outta your silver tongue mouth you fuckin word smith you!

Sounds like a curse
>checked

lurking more? that's a good idea

It can be a blessing and a curse. Socially, it's the killing curse. As far as intelligence, it's a blessing. But the loneliness and humiliation makes me want to die.

Ok, here's a brief autism story

>Be me at 18
>Kissless virgin
>Talking to a girl I had a massive crush on
>She didn't like me back, but I just wanted her to "give me a chance"
>Try to convince her
>Say "In many arranged marriages, the wife does not initially love her husband, but comes to love him over the course of years"
>"So too will you learn to love me"

Holy shit I know that feel, that intense anxiety and fear knowing your completely fucked and you're just waiting for the punishment and yelling it to happen so you can get it over with.

yeah it fuckin sucks

>you learn to love me

kek

It's okay

When you grow a little hair "down there" and your voices change ...

Yeah, the three months or so that I was pursuing that girl were some of the cringiest of my life. Hell, most of my adolescence was a fucking roller coaster of cringe

>tfw you skip school and make a thread about it

...

Fucking gold

Have you ever tried to learn social cues?

>tfw it was literally the second most "exciting" thing i did that year

Oh grow up you whiny bitch. I have schizophrenia. I never know if today is the last day I'll be able to hold a conversation or remember who the fuck I am. People use the phrase schizo to make jokes all the time. People are assholes. Learn to deal with it or become an hero

i-i-i'm 31 years old

I love autism threads too, guy. Just keeping it real boi. Know the difference between being a stupid kid and having autism. Carry on.

I learn cues like people without autism, you pick them up as you socialize. However it is harder for people with autism to pick up on them, so they don't learn them as quickly. It sets them back years socially. Also I have a slight lazy eye so that coupled with a stupid social mistake (like talking too much, missing something, etc.) gives it away. I'm pretty good at hiding my autism most of the time, but of course if I let the façade slip even once then everyone will know.

It's okay sempai, I'm 63

I'm just trying to show what autism is really like. I like reading funny autism stories too, but just know there is a darker part of it too.

So how long have you been retarted?
Was it diagnosed as a wee lad?

he is obviously, tits or gtfo came from attention whores a while back

> be me
> be 13
> really like the warrior cats book series
> pretty much obsessed
> I had a dsi and there was an app of sorts on it called flipnote studio
> there was an online thing where you could share your stuff called flipnote hatena
> find warrior cats channel
> there was a chatroom of sorts on there where people would chat in the comments section of the flipnote
> maybe fifteen people who went in there daily
> including girls
> I made some friends and talked to people on there for a bit
> mostly talked with the girls, who were also my age
> heavy amounts of rp in that chatroom
> end up "going out" with this one chick on there (and so the cringe begins)

Cont. (not pretyped because fuck you faggots)

Got a story of how i lost my virginity
>Redhead named jennifer, 8/10 at least
>Easily my best friend, no trouble talking to her
>Pray all the time that i can fuck her
>Likes concerts so decide to take her to one
>Yes i know im desperate but
>On our way to concert, we start talking
>Really horny since she is wearing short clothing
>Yes i know im a faggot
>On verge of full erection while driving
>Unhappy that I have this erection
>"Really, you think im blind user?"
>Make the suffering end.jpg
>Out of nowhere she grabs peen through pants
>Mothermarry.jpg
>Dick throbbing like a motherfucker
>In a moment we pull over and fuck right there
>End up dating after that, still dating now
>So happy i could cry
until she read me the first word of every sentence

stay on your meds and please, don't miss a dose

...

>how long have you had autism
nigger from birth, it's a developmental disorder. I was diagnosed when I took an IQ test in elementary school. At least they told me is was for IQ, but looking back I think it was for autism and my parents wanted to hide that I had it. To this day they've never told me about it or talked to me about it, I think they thought it would just go away or something. I didn't even know I was autistic until last year when I finally came to terms with it.

hahHAHha

nigger

I've got a pretty good one

>be me
>be on Sup Forums

what finally gave it away

also, not a nigger faggot

> this chick and I "date" for a bit, let's call her C
> she wants to take that shit to the next level
> bout to get my cyber dick wet
> we go to one of her older flipnotes (some shitty warrior cats amv, for extra cringe. We all made them in that community)
> the sexting is fucking awful from what I remember, crossing out bad words and shit, because we're so innocent
> I thought it was the best thing ever at the time
> I was a habitual liar at that age
> I told her some bullshit that she didn't believe, something about spooky cryptid monsters because I was a fucking loser
> she called me out on it
> I cry and get really mad
> quit hatena for a couple days, but make a flipnote saying I'm leaving for good
> pic related

cont.

oh remember the stickman fight with in the end playing
that garbage actually seemed pretty cool at the time

You sure your not me in some form?

>Be me, 20
>Just finished 2 years of community college
>Has friends, but is usually quiet, and keeps to myself when alone/surrounded by people I don't know.
>Need to get a job
>Didn't think I needed anything big as I was still young, lived with parents, and wanted to start paying off my student loan.
>New Dunkin opens up in town, decide to apply there.
>Get call back, set up quick interview date.
>Arrive on time looking fairly well dressed, Black Formal shirt with a tie.
>Interview starts.
>"So, user. Have you ever been in any leadership positions before?"
>I start talking about fucking video games.
>10 minutes go by, he's clearly disinterested, he wraps it up, and we go our seperate way.
>Get home, play vidya, watch animu, and never go out of my way to go through an interview ever again.
>If anything, Temporary Work for a short time, then go back to the good life.
>I hope I die soon.

Not bad faggot

I have one for you guys, does anybody have the "that's where I come in and the spaghetti comes out" story? That was autism all the way through

> decide to get back on hatena because I need something to do while I'm not sleeping
> go back to same chatroom
> no shame
> talk to the same people, lots of them are happy to see I'm back
> we're all losers
> new chick in town, let's call her U
> C and U get along pretty well
> time to change that shit
> U and I start to talk a lot
> we start to do a romantic rp
> she wants to bang
> K
> just as bad as the first time with C
> she blew me this time though, so it was a bit better
> still really shitty
> C finds out somehow and is pissed that I fucked U pretty much instantly, and that she kind of had to convince me to do it with her (C) when we did it
> I don't really get into a thing with U for very long because we weren't as close intimately
> sort of an on and off type deal
> still have shitty cyber sex
> during a time when I'm not currently on with U, C starts to get kind of flirty
> I don't really respond to it too much, mostly because I already jerked off and didn't want any more fuck
> she still wants to bang

Cont.

I called you a nigger, not a nigger faggot. I always knew I wasn't normal but last year I did a bunch of research on social disorders and many of the symptoms for autism are things I've experienced, especially when I was a kid. Lining things up, self harm, avoiding eye contact. Spinning things, I used to spin pencils and coins on my desk all the time in middle school.
This "IQ" test i took in elementary school still haunts me. All I remember was the guidance counselor being angry at my mother about something to do with the test results. I remember failing parts of the test but my mother said i did very well, so well that i would be taking gifted classes, which they do with some autistic kids whose autism isn't too severe. Again my parents never mentioned anything about it to me so I don't know for sure.

I got one
>be me
>8th grade
>skate to school because I'm cool
>decide to ditch and wonder whats the worst that could happen
>going airsofting with friends later
>go home since parents are at work
>chill out
>parents have vegas fund that they keep money in for when they go to vegas
>Get bored
>goes through vegas fund
>$100
>take
>go around shopping n shit
>go to goodwill to find some rare comics/vidya
>find some comics I knew nothing about
>buy it for $1
>worth $400
>go to school becaus home was boring
>get home
>parents find out I ditched
>grounded and cant go airsofting
>never found out about the $100
>sell the comic
>rich

>be me
>Join army
>In AIT
>Weekend so I'm at a hotel party (every other room is drunk AIT soldiers)
>Run into this girl Kinsley I had a huge crush on in basic training
>Invite her to my room for a drink
>She tells me she's too depressed because she just got dumped
>Offer to go kick his ass to cheer her up
>laughs "Ok he's down at the pool"
>"What's his name"
>"Private Rambo" "for reals?" "Yes"
>Grab by battle buddy and tell him I'm about to go get in a fight. He followers me as black up
>find the table by the pool the girl said he was last at
>"I'm looking for private Rambo"
>"He walked off a while ago"
>Next table "Any of you guys Rambo?"
>dude raises his hand "I'm Rambo"
>Right hook. Best punch I've ever thrown. His face bounces off the table
>"That's for Kinsley motherfucker!"
>Turn and walk away feeling like a boss
>hear his friend ask "What the fuck? Who the fuck is Kinsley?"
>"Ummm... His ex gf"
>"He isn't Rambo! That's a fictional fucking character!"
>"Not the one I was looking for"
>His friends want to jump me but are afraid of my battle buddy
>Apologize repeatedly and offer to let him hit me twice.
>he's still too dazed to respond much
>back to Kinsley's room "Did you do it?"
>"I hit the wrong guy"
>She doesn't go back to my room
>Show up to formation the next day
>Everyone is calling me Rambo
>Turns out the guy I hit was in my unit

kek

>gifted classes
>whose autism isn't too severe

so you werent in the class?

I was in some gifted classes.

haha. legend.

since you didnt understand the sarcasm I actually believe you might be autistic

i got sent to "gifted" classes in school.

it was literally retards. principle used it as a punishment to get me to study harder.

instead i just got raped.

> I said yes, still want into it
> we went to another video and did the usual
> actually wasn't so bad this time, no censor, and it turns out she was an absolute fucking slut
> too bad the only time it was decent, I wasn't into it
> continue with normal bullshit, stay with C for a while
> U starts to get jealous
> she wan sum fuk
> being the helpless victim I was, I obliged
> C finds out somehow again
> ohshitnigger.wmv
> she's hella pissed
> no more decent sexting with C, just shitty stuff with U
> not much else to tell on that bit until later. This is a long tale, lads
> there was another girl on there, who we will call F
> she was my first friend on there
> we never got romantically close, although now that I think about it I can't see why not
> one night her and I are chatting, and she hits me with "I'm horny"

Cont.

literally physically raped? thats fucked up tell me more

Same

Please point out "the sarcasm"

i can see the "F U C K Y O U" coming a mile away

I was saying that he had severe autism

Look man i know those feels and shit, but who the fuck in their right mind thinks "if i keep the keys inside the car and lock it outside then its good!". you couldve just
>exit car with keys
>lock car with keys
>find bill return keys
>go home which by that time
>mothers friends would have been way past you
>no trouble at all
Or maybe actually go to school instead of being an emotional prick?
whatever dude. im sick of pathetic people like you who dont think things through even if you were just a kid.

pinned down by downie with retard strength

anus gets penetrated, blood and shit everywhere, retard cums in my ass. teacher pulls him off and they try to say i made him do it.

even the teachers looked at me with disgust.

fuck my life.

weak joke

are you fucking retarded? i shouldve gone back into the school where a woman was getting the principles to come get me in trouble? lmao PLUS i cant just run into a classroom and throw him some keys and run out. I was also panicking and how am I an emotional prick for not going to school when i was 14? i was a fucking kid, its what we did in my town for fun

> F and I bang once
> not bad
> never fuck her again, felt kinda weird
> C finds out I fucked F through some magic bullshit (I don't fucking understand how this bitch always knew)
> she gets pissed at me again
> says we have to fuck to make it up to her
> this time she wanted to do it in a warrior cats rp
> I was down
> mfw I was a furry
> after a while, people stop showing up to the chat, myself included
> I'm not in contact with anyone on there anymore

I know the first and last names of F and C, as well as their city (which is, like, 50 miles away from me), so I could probably find a way to try to contact them if you guys want

For the guy who related to my story, does the name Grif mean anything to you?

I also have some stories from being a moderator on the dsichat thing from the dsitube website

Kill yourself

holy fucking shit, why did you not sue that fucking place?>

Sorry, mate. This wasn't a shitpost

haha gay

Why?

Exposed