/brit/

Big Ed edition

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SUPERB edition

nth for the correct (Australian) pronunciation of vitamin

the vi rhymes with eye

IT WAS ALL A DREAM

Quite a yank way of saying it

cara

pls put big ed in terms an americhant would understand
what is the US equivalent to big ed?

>Billboards featuring two girls in hijabs are set to be installed around the country after an Australia Day sign was taken down in Melbourne following complaints it featured Muslims
>"I'm overwhelmed and just incredibly heartened I guess because it feels like sometimes the bastards are winning," she said. "Then when this happens you just think, 'No they're not, there's a whole lot of really good people out there'.
ah yes
wonder how long before it's officially renamed Invasion Day

imagining a pretty girl that appreciates me and likes spending time with me

At least you got a lot of imagination

I had one of those (a gf) for 5 years

Someone who ran for office, was ironically popular because they were weird and funny, then got absolutely walloped and resigned

Just realised that I am EXACTLY the type of bloke who women don't really want to be with, but will begrudgingly settle for at the age of 32 having themselves realised that the types of bloke they want to be with have no interest in being with them, and that they don't really have a good career, so what they need is a steady dependable boring bloke with a good job. You're probably that sort of bloke too.

>if it's not british it must be american!

howling at your binary fucking noggins

never really understood why they want it renamed to invasion day desu

it wasn't an invasion at all

I can't actually imagine it

London smells like sewage

Are pensions a meme?

Every month ~£250 goes into my workplace pension. That includes my employer's 9% contribution. Is this definitely the right thing for me to be doing?

um don't think you asked the aboriginals if they wanted to stop throwing spears at each other hun, that's an invasion and illegal occupation x

Jeremy Corbyn

Yes, it's free money
however you should also have a savings account you can withdraw from, too

>dependable bloke with a good job
>You're probably that sort of bloke too
don't think so matey

Lads haha

Get in here, having a ball lads!

so does New York City it also has a layer of soot covering everything and is absolutely teeming with minorities

*unzips Paris*

I get taxed 10% for social security even though I only made $5,000 last year. It won't even exist for me to use in 50 years anyway

Feels great

>all friends are successful
>im still a neet

>implying our generation will ever retire

I put my money into a funeral plan. Funerals rise in price 6% every year. That's better than any interest rate we'll ever get again.

i miss miliband

the depression isn't going away haha

looks like the ex gf

trained killer who can't eat sandwiches properly

Pensions are good to have but you should also be investing in mutual and index funds

Good to hear.

Yeah I do have savings also. Every month I put ~£400 into a cash ISA but the interest rate is absolutely dire (0.5% or some shit).

Then I wonder if I would be better served putting a larger proportion of that money into the pension pot but then obviously then it's trapped away until I'm at least 55 (assuming I don't kill myself before then). But I guess it's useful to have a big pot of liquid, accessible money early on for house deposits etc.

New York deserves another 9/11

>gypsy filled pickpocket "city" of piss

don't isolate yourself, bud

...

wish I lived in England so I could have a cool nickname like Big Gaz

Very very strange.

Ever notice how all politicians and business leaders pay homage to Angela Merkel in the exact same way they do Israel?

glad maggie closed down those mines. The only people who cared were runts who had an IQ of 4 and were incapable of doing anything other than working in a mine. pathetic.

aim lower

their "success" is probably managing a sports direct

alri Rasheed

You're a Big Gaz

>house deposits
You got a help-to-buy ISA yet?

>Angler Merkel

Might want to look into a non-taxed retirement account. They usually invest in mutual funds/stocks/bonds and return 4-5% a year.

If you withdraw before 65 you get taxed on it though. In America we call it an IRA.

I've considered it and know it is sensible but then I have also heard that it doesn't make sense to tie money up in investments when you aren't properly set up yet. Like I still live at home, I don't own property, I don't even have a mortgage, my current job is more of a job than a career etc.

Investments feel like more of a long term thing once you are firmly in your rut in life.

no, i mean like the entire idea of an invasion is that it is premeditated to be an invasion. the entire definition of the word is based around a clear objective to entire enemy territory and attempt to sieze control.

the british landed and the mistreatment arose from there. they didn't land with the intention of fucking them up, and phillip made the command to leave them the fuck alone and let them live peacefully.

Lads. I've got 45k to my name but no formal qualifications. Does that mean I have no chance of moving abroad?

Merkel is a saint for standing up against the tyrannical will of the people

I work in a bank and get a staff bond at 4%. Can only put £500 a month in tho

Germany unironically controls the EU.
If you don't suck her cock, your country's bond rate will rise 50%.

I think I worked it out one day, the maximum benefit you get from a help-to-buy ISA is something like £3,000. That's if you max your contributions and keep it open for the max length of time. I think I can live with paying £3k less on a deposit.

>FOB
yeah

You could move to Switzerland and then off yourself.

yeah but I mean even Americans, even American Republicans for the most part all praise Merkel.

Lad you're absolutely wrong about that

It's never too early to start investing money
Compound interest is the 8th wonder of the modern world

Keep an emergency fund (6 months to 1 year of living expenses) in a savings account so it's liquid and DO NOT touch it in case of emergency

Put everything else in mutual and index funds where you can watch your money grow rather than just have it lazing about

hope you're joking

why on earth would you pay money for an event that takes place after your own death

Thought about it.

I haven't.

>it technician job near me
>15,000
>degree and 1 years experience required

ah yes

"Conservative" shills have to stick together for appearances.

They are an endangered species.

how do i keep this buzz going?

who

i'm assuming paul ryan? he's a globalist, not a republican

Because I don't want my family to have to pay 20 grand for a funeral for me. If I pay for my funeral plan now, my funeral only costs what I paid today. It's a plan that protects you from the rise in costs every year. It's fool proof

>mfw I can now falseflag as a brit for a few months

if they want to spend 20 grand to chuck you in the ground that's their own fucking nutcase problem

to be fair, he has a point
my gf's parents just paid for her nan's funeral because she's gonna pop her clogs any week now, and paid for both of theirs while they were at it because they're gonna skyrocket over the next few years

i dont think funerals will cost that much. no one will pay for them.

>implying you deserve a 20k funeral

You'd be happy with not having a funeral and being thrown in a ditch? Everyone has to think of funeral preparations

think the algerian bought a proxy

How do you actually get your money out once it is invested though? Say I invest £5k in something pretty boring and safe, an index fund, and over 5 years it grows by however much. How do I reap those rewards? Like is that money accessible or what?

get into the funeral home business if you want to make some serious money

baby boomers are gonna all start dying off within the next 10-20 years

Pretty much all of them except for the small Trump coalition.

They all praise her for standing up for muh """western values""" and for handling the refugee crisis.

no way it costs 20k to dig a whole and chuck you in

>Everyone has to think of funeral preparations

Not when I'm 23

Anycunt?

> yanks call spring onions "scallions"
IT JUST DOESN'T END

FUCKING YANKS

Even Trump praised Merkel in the past

im 18, still in high school

You can withdraw it from your brokerage account at any time but it may take a few days for everything to transfer over to your bank account which is why an emergency fund kept in a bank is important because you may need the money immediately at some point in the future

Do muggers these days ask their victims to factory reset the phone first?

Like if you are robbing someone at knife point, why take a locked iPhone that is no use to anyone when you can just force the victim to unlock it, navigate to the settings page then factory reset it first?

it starting to get like that everywhere.

soon you'll need a degree to be on checkouts

thats dumb, you get a free burial or cremation if you don't pay for one anyway, not sure why people would make a big thing over it. Losing a significant amount of cash over what amounts to a cadaver is just nonsensical

you realise you will be dead an incapable of caring about your familys 20 grand right?

also who the fuck pays 20 grand for a 6 foot ditch and a preist and a party, I'll dig you a hole for 200 quid, sounds like your willingly mugging yourself off

20k was an exaggeration but funeral costs rise every single year. If I pay £x now I know I don't have to pay any more in the future

if you don't do anything they just burn you and throw the ashes away, if your family wants a shrine they can pay for it

>all these job listings needing me to call or email just to get told I don't meet the basic qualifications
wonderful

>You'd be happy with not having a funeral and being thrown in a ditch?

irrelevant, I'll be dead.
frankly I don't care at all what happens to me after I die, how could I?

just bury me at sea for free. i dont care.

What is Ed ancestry. He looks Pakistani

>buried

2spooky

burn me to ashes please

coriander and rocket get bastardised beyond recognition too

>cilantro
>arugula

i've never met an italian or greek who i didn't like

You either call them and do a money transfer to a debit account (takes a week) or pay a small fee and wire it within a day. You can also do the first option online.

As he said, keep a liquid emergency fund in the .5% interest account.
But invest any non-emergency savings in your index fund/mutual fund. That makes 5% a year on average.

Read this senpai
google.co.uk/amp/www.telegraph.co.uk/investing/online-investments/where-to-invest-10000-pounds/amp/?client=safari

polish jew

>arugula
that's a new one on me

fucking yANKOIDS REEEEEEE

>zucchini

>client=safari
doxxed

you dont have to pay anything if you're dead

better start planning your funeral sharpish m8

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