Does Sup Forums have any experience with strippers?

Does Sup Forums have any experience with strippers?

about the same experience as that dude. it takes like 30 seconds to realize they are all nasty nasty players and only after your money

thats a man baby

went to a strip club once with my mates and got a lapdance. Jizzed my pants 30 seconds into it, started crying, flushed my pants down the toilet and left.

greentext?

Once on vacation me and 2 other went to one.

Closest to a pussy I've been in my life so far when some dude paid big to make all ladies lapdance for who they are currently trying to scam.

I was a sripper for summer before i got my drivers permit to pay for my first car, a girl i went to hs school with was already working there she got me the job. All they did was photocopy my fake id, as far as i knew they never found out, my friend got pregnant and quit though.

Did it twice. Felt like a huge waste of money just getting blueballed for a ton of cash when I could have just jacked off at home.

"experience with strippers"

MODS. UNDERAGED BAN!

Just, before you get b& listen. That woman is no "woman" in the context you're likely thinking of her.

She's working. She has absolutely NO sexual interest in you. If you have enough money, all women can be JUST like her. I swear to you.

1) Did your pants clog the toilet? \

2) If not, what kind of pants were you wearing and what kind of toilet was it?


3) Did you have to walk around with no pants on?

4) If so, did you attract any attention? How long were you pantless?

I've had experience with prostitutes.

I have a pregnant fetish, so it was the only way for me to bang a preggo without anyone noticing.

Pic related.

Another one.

>only after your money
What did you expect? Some kind of deep relationship from someone that licks shiny poles for cash?

It's better to see it as a business relationship. She wants the money, you want the pussy.

Wise Old Fag here - Been to a hundred strip clubs at least and banged at least a couple dozen strippers. Some I paid, others I just picked up from the club.

Best advice I can give - don't go to the glitzy high end clubs. They just shove a vacuum hose in your wallet and you'll never get much without tons of cash. Go to a small locals-type club, late afternoon when it's not too busy. The girls working then are desperate for cash because business is always slow in the afternoon. They may not be the hottest strippers in town, but you may even get sucked off for the price of a lapdance. Also, their shift ends at 7, so if you played your cards right, she'll be coming back with you. It may take some cash ($100 max), but then she may just go to your place to get stoned and fuck. You'll have to pick her up away from the club or she'll have to come to your place. Girls are usually not allowed to get into customer's cars on the clubs property.

>Closest to a pussy I've been in my life so far

Except she gets the money and you get no pussy. They aren't prostitutes...

>Girls are usually not allowed to get into customer's cars on the clubs property.
Knowing how true this is, this user clearly knows what he's talking about.

Pedo

Everyone knows that shit. Pick them up at the 7 eleven a block down.

Of course I do, I'm the Wise Old Fag!

but most of them are---...if you have at least a little bit of game

Very true.

>tfw that dude is just trying not to cry knowing he fucked a nigger

you did a Sup Forums post with your hooker??

No one fucked that slut

story time
>be me
>never been to strip club
>friend has never been to strip club
>we decide to go
>she's 7.3/10, has bf, whatever
>get a bit tipsy
>pay door fee
>take in experience
>very weird
>tuesday night, about 11pm
>few creepy guys around
>two obvious newfag strippers looking insecure, one had cute face but they weren't really doing anything
>every five or ten minutes, dj announces a stripper and she works a pole on the stage
>one girl fucking incredible performer, most shit
>eventually think 'fuck it' and get private dance from some stripper
>alright body, bit of a butterface, nice cooch
>friend wants a dance but nervous, wants me in with her
>double strip action
>go back to hers
>both horny
>fuck
>train to another fucking country in the morning, drive home probably still drunk to shower and get ready
>leave boxers under her bed by mistake
>cuck bf finds them, still doesn't leave her, doesn't confront me about it

only other experience was a shit overpriced dance at the very end of my stag night, didn't even take thong off, 5/10 looks, 1/10 value.

just doesn't seem worth the money. more cost effective to buy a girl drinks at a bar, then take her home.

my parents owned a topless bar for seven years. third-tier. blue collar clientele. strippers were mostly single mom types. 90% looked better when clothed. Way too much cottage cheese ass and thighs, and horrible pancake tits.
The pretty young ones would arrive late as possible, say midnight, and make a quick $300 bucks in a couple hours, then leave. The others were losers who hung around all the time. Almost got laid but i was too shy.

Anyone have experiences with massage parlors?

They're basically all whores who will do anything if the price is right, just like all the other women out there. Strippers are all fucking crazier than other women though, so don't stick your dick in them.


The big difference is, they're more up front about what a $100 investment in them will get you. Spend $100 on a date with a girl and you may or may not get to see titties, get a blowy, or a three hole bone-a-thon. Spend $100 in a strip club and you'll get two drinks, tuck some bills into multiple girls' underwear, and a lap dance or two.

It's all about the different risk appetites guys have. If you wanna try to shoot the moon and get an awesome return, date women. If you want to spend a few bucks to get a little over the pants fun and then go home and jack it, goto a strip club.

sorry, i'm a brit. Pants=underwear

Checked

be me
mom is parlor
get hand
blow nut
i have good time

Fuck you nigger, what about mine?

are your initials jw, user?

First time I went to the club I fingered a stripper and lost my contact in someone boobs. Great time.

How did you?...

treat them like not people

because they will treat you the same way, unless your in a different country then its a bit different

Why would I pay a woman to give me wood When I can't do anything about it? i've never understood the point of strippers, it's all build up with no release.

agree, it's a cuck thing to do

The first time i went to a strip club was a day after my dad passed. Maybe not such a good idea because all i wanted to do was chill and soak up the atmosphere. You know get my mind off of things. But strippers are pushy bitches and they kept accosting me, but thats their job so whatever.

I ended up telling this girl about how i found my dad or whatever and boom, i start crying at a strip club. Like full blown tears going down my face. The stripper was cool about it. Taken by surprise, i doubt a lot of guys have tried this technique. The lap dances were nice but i was distracted by emotions. She was the only girl i talked to all night which sucks because the were a couple of cuties.

>i start crying at a strip club
tbh man, your dad just died, that's a natural reaction no matter where you are

Went to a strip club 3 times with friends. Paid 50+ bucks each time to look at naked women, and I couldnt even masturbate while doing it. Porn is free and you wont become a sex offender if you whip your cock out while watching it.

-31 years old
-had multiple GFs
-had sex with probably close to 10 women
-married now with a kid

>literally never been to a strip club

I kind of wish I had gone/would go. I feel like it's a right of passage that I missed out on. However I have so much better things I'd rather spend my money on.

SOMEBODY ones have known me

Strippers call themselves "topless psychologists" and they laugh about it.

lots of men open up to strippers for some reason.

Fuck you normie loser. Close to 10? Code for 2.

>greentext