New feels thread

new feels thread
other one sorta trailed off
don't wanna be alone this evening...

Whats this from?

...

pretty sure it's Akame Ga Kill but I found it here so I'm not certain

...

hey bud
something on your mind?

It's from Serial Experiments Lain, rhe ps1 video game

beautiful gif.

Lain

far too much. want the long version or the short version? or shall we suffice it to say that I'm not ok.

dumping #2

tell me whatever you're willing to say m8
i've found its most helpful to talk about one big thing in detail than try to describe every thing that's wrong

saved, thanks kindly

...

Zozzled.

...

I have a good but very depressed friend.
Normally we're writing much and so on but the last days she was different...more into herself and now I didnt heard anything from her for like the last 38 hours. Im quite nervous and a bit afraid that she could have done sth stupid...
What should i do guys?

...

...

Get the fuck out of here. Try leddit out with this emo fagshit. Or better yet, literally kill yourself.

...

If she knows you, she defintely killed herself.

...

...

if she's nearby go to her house and check on her

...

...

What should I do? Im going to visit her place but if nobody is there? Call the police? Im really worried.

...

...

...

...

Dumped the less emo one of a folder i found that i made around 5 years ago. I'm worst than i was back then. But never back down Anons, i love you all.

nutshell version is better I think. feel free to ask for more details if you think they're relevant.

>be me, about four years ago now
>at the time I was on the metaphorical fence about whether I wanted to have kids
>gf at the time (now ex) was cheating on me almost our entire relationship
>now have three year old son with ex who I am only about 50% certain is actually mine
>I now also have 50% custody of my son which prevents me from having to pay child support
>have second kid with ex who I'm nearly 100% certain is not mine
>this second kid was put up for adoption and I don't see him
>decide after second kid is born that I cannot stand children
>have one year old daughter with soon to be wife (we're to be wed 3 sep 16)
>still hate kids
>can't stand screaming, crying, shitty everything, lack of sleep... etc.
>uncontrollable floods of violent homicidal/suicidal thoughts whenever either kid is screaming/crying/etc.
>even when I get a break, while they're asleep/napping/etc. I can't escape the fact that It's simply never going to end
>problems will just continue to escalate
>nothing makes me smile anymore
>constant fighting with fiance over even the little things like songs for our wedding next week.
>feels like only two ways out
>can't afford to make either of them happen
>am here to vent

my fiance tells me almost daily that I need to talk to someone, like a therapist or something
but I've been over the facts enough times that I know the only way this hell will ever come to an end is if I didn't have to deal with all the kid shit anymore. hindsight being what it is, I of course realise that I'm at fault for landing myself in this nightmare, which only adds to my anguish.

...

I suppose I should also mention that the only thing that's remotely helped me over the last year or so is sitting at my computer, getting blindly drunk and playing the few video games that still interest me. it helps me to forget, if even temporarily. but it's not enough.

>le animay mayme

i've resisted therapy for a while because i thought i knew the cause and solution to my problems
i finally caved bc it became too much to bear i needed something man, anything
it was extremely helpful, just the interview session where i talked about myself.
go talk to a therapist. if you commit yourself to the experience it can be enormously helpful.
i know it's hard and you don't mean to, but don't release your frustration on your fiance. its not her fault for your feelings and she only wants to help.

I am going to make an appointment first thing on monday. if nothing else, it'll make everyone else happy even if it doesn't help me. and making everyone else happy would actually help me, believe it or not.
and I try to direct my frustration away from her. most of the time it works... other times I have to buy wine and roses.

I'll try to post again after I talk to someone. for now I think I'm gonna go back to lurking. maybe find a ylyl thread to cheer me up.

Thanks guys.

>married 7.5 years
>wife given antidepressant rx 4 months ago
>doc only puts her on different antidepressant when told she feels hollow
>I haven't seen her for 8 days
>friends finally tell me she's been cheating for 2 months

I'm done romantically with her, as a decent human those meds are ruining her.

god damn dude I'm sorry to hear that
you have any kids with her?

Thankfully no, I just want her to not be hollow anymore with or without me. I had the same shit happen to me a few years back from meds. The only thing worse than experiencing it, is watching it happen to someone you loved and knowing how it feels.

>destroyed me to type
>was before told about cheating
Once we get the card caught up, I want you to pick another doc out of our pockets to try to get you back on xanax. Whether you leave me or not, I'm worried about you being this hollow. I want you to have a counselor too, so you don't feel empty and stuck In The internal void I fought for years. Love me or hate me, you have been the only person I can trust. You fought so hard for me, and I can't let you fester in the Hell I put myself in. I just want you happy period with or without me, regardless of my feelings. The pershmerga stuff if we split Is to help the oppressed but also to allow us both a solid distance.

It's not akame ga kill, just finished it and this was not in it

...

worth watching though? I have it on my list but I haven't gotten around to it for lack of free time.

also who is that??????

This was us before the meds, I can't even be angry if she doesn't love me anymore. I just want honesty about it

and then there are ingrates like this who have everything handed to them. do me a favour and turn yourself inside out you waste of a shitsmear.

Hahaha what the fuck was she shot a 50. cal or something holy shit

Wots da animoo m8?

we need more animals

dude right these get to me like fuck you've no Idea