BDSM thread

BDSM thread

I want to know what it takes to be a Dom. So here I am.

Share anything you got to say, pics, stories, experiences, whatever.

Other urls found in this thread:

manyvids.com/Video/163918/Daddy-spanks-me!/
gardenhose.thecomicseries.com/archive/
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

depends on yours and your girl preferences, what are your kinks?

I'm interested in.. Rope play, breath play, edgeplay, bondage, kitten play, total domination, showers, public, humiliation, degration, gangplay, age play, cbt, I'll do anything

I'm a dom

Can you give me some tips?

It's a girl who lives a few hours away so seeing each other won't be often.. But she wants to explore her fantasies and they are dirty.. How do I get her comfortable with them and doing them.. We've only done light rope play but wanna go farther

Male sub slut reporting in.

1st step is to talk about it with your partner or find a partner which might have more or less your same interest.

Out of personal experience I would suggest you to take an evening for you and your gf.
Get slightly (seriously, just slightly, otherwise it's dangerous) high and introduce the topic. If your partner is interested, chances are that the topics made you both a bit horny. In this case you should be at least a bit prepared: you don't even need a rope, a couple of belts or thigh highs/ collants, even long sleeved t-shirts will help you.
You start with this improvised light bondage and see if you both like.

on her knees to please her master hsve fun

If you want to be a Dom, you're not one. If you want to prove that you're a Dom, you're not one. If you have to ask how to be a Dom, you're not one. Maybe someday, but the problem you're having is that you don't have the right attitude to be a Dom. It's not the things you do, it's how you do them. Why you do them. Until you get the right mentality, nothing you "do" will make you a Dom.

On her knees to please her Masters Have fun with her

If you both do like, start buying some basic equipment, and start by slowly introducing what I think are the easiest things to master: edgeplay and degradation.
Simple thing for edgeplay is to stimulate her a lot without penetration, then you start by teasing her with your dick, then fuck her but stop when you think she's approaching the climax.
The idea is to make her feel full and close to release and then to deny it. Make her beg for it, when she does sufficiently you can either fuck her brains out / stimulate clit or say no !
Simple start for degradation is to cum on her face and make her lick, to make her taste herself and if she's at least a little shy to make her masturbate (after a while you can make her do it in front of the window or in hidden public places)

found the kissless virgin

Nah man, just saying it's a mindset, and not a series of actions.

Dude is right, you should actually feel it. If you don't it might be that it's just not your thing, or that you are shy: in the latter case a -little- amount of alchol might do the trick. Even a little more but don't go further than rough play/humiliation and maybe making her edge. In any case never drink too much and do more than cuffing your partners hands. If shyness is your problem I would suggest trying dirty talk: calling her names and stuff.

The thing is.. She's an experienced sub and I'm not an experienced Dom. But I'm kind of a sub and she's domming me to Dom her? If that makes sense

If you're not feeling like being a dom then she should not press you. You can act like it, but she would feel the difference anyway.
Why don't you ask her what she would like you to do then if she's experienced?

it's actually a dynamic between two people. Someone that is Dom with one girl, can also be submissive or vanilla with another. It's chemistry, and when you find the right chemistry it's really easy to become Dominant

this is my post take your most submissive urges and fetishes and act them out on her. I've been in the same position. The first time I ever dommed a female, I pretty much acted out how I submitted to someone else. Take the same tone and attitude as you would like to be dominated, etc

At best, you can become a Switch.. though a lot of "experienced" subs and Doms don't believe Switches are real. Basically, what that is, is someone who can switch between the Dom/sub role. But if your gf is a more hardcore sub, she won't be happy with that.

No. What your describing isn't a Dom/sub relationship. No true Dom will ever be a sub for anyone. If you're willing to be submissive, you're not a Dom. As I stated here.. At best you're a Switch.

But in the one relationship I am the Dom and that's all she knows me as. It's the image you put out. She doesn't know I'm a switch and will never, she doesn't see that side.

I'm just a kinky fuck and not insecure

You're implying a switch can't have a dom/sub realationship... while by definition a switch can have it and not only, he/she can play both roles.

>what it takes to be a dom
you never will be

>I want to know what it takes to be a Dom.

Anyone can be a Dom. But to be a good Dom, you need experience.

I wouldn't take seriously anyone who pretend to be a dom and is under 25 for a girl and 30 for a guy.

But a good thing to start is relying on accessories, and gear.

Being a sub doesn't mean that you're insecure. One of my subs was very confident, and in control of every aspect of her life.. aside from our relationship. In that, she took pleasure from me having complete control over her.

Make some tacos

here is a realistic response

a bunch of edgelords in here.

Dom is a role. You are trying so hard to sound like you are a "true dom", stop that, your insecurities are transparent.

No.. what I implied was that IF the girl is a hardcore submissive, and not just someone who dabbles in it, then she won't be happy with a Switch.

Trust.
That's it.

LOOK HOW ALPHA I AM

REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

manyvids.com/Video/163918/Daddy-spanks-me!/

I'm just giving information. Take it or leave it.

Information are supposed to be true.

What you are giving is an uneducated point of view based on your lack of experience.

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thats many times the case. People in control and with power often needs to surrender all power and control to relax.

experienced Dom with this sub I'm sure. Notice head down, blindfold, hand tied behind back. totally in Dom's control. Has no idea what he will have her do, or to who she will hsve to do it to. The coller I!m sure will be next as she crawls on floor.

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I'm not sure, I consider myself a switch, as in some cases I've been the sub, but I would really like to find a hardcore sub to really free my dom instincts. I guess of course there are not 3 distincts types, but a continuum.
Thought OP seems more sub/vanilla to me rather than switch.

Am I the only one who finds all the names like dom and sub so tacky and cringey? As someone who isn't into any of this shit i find it incredibly cringe worthy.

>She doesn't know I'm a switch and will never, she doesn't see that side.

Stop being a faggot. You don't have to hide that you are a switch. It's actually a good thing to have experienced both side of ti, you get a better understanding of what happen to your sub.

BDSM isn't about beating your chest like an ape and acting though and pretending you're the most alpha.

BDSM is about guidance, understanding, it's about helping a sub discovers herself, tutoring her, being firm ( and not being violent).

Then why are you in this thread, that is so OBVIOUSLY about the topic?

>BDSM is about guidance, understanding, it's about helping a sub discovers herself, tutoring her,

This.

first thing is to learn to treat a sub properly - that means learning communication, being able to look out for the well-being of the sub, (top drop, for example), being able to respect their limits and to emphasise with them. Once you've got those, *then* you can start thinking about pushing the boundaries, and giving them orders.

Idiots who do the "I am dom! I Kneel before me, worm! Do my bidding, oh, what's your name?" thing rarely end up having actual partners. they end up as sad, angry Internet Doms trying to get the attention of inexperienced young girls/boys who dont realise how toxic their behaviour is - at least till the poor sub actually gets into contact with other subs, and quickly realises that their so-called dom is nothing but a prick with an abusive streak.

A proper, good dom knows the sub's limits, pushes them, but underneath it, should also care. Or to put it another way, dont break your toys.

kek because i'm interested in finding out what the fuss is about i suppose. My gf is really into it... and i'm not really. All i'm saying is the terminology and all the attitudes and arrogance that goes along with it is so lame.

the arrogance and pompous attitude are the mark of wannabee dom trying too hard to look tough and alpha because they aren't confident

Also.. this.

>BDSM isn't about beating your chest like an ape and acting though and pretending you're the most alpha.

This.

This times 1000.

Written out in 100pt font.

That sort of behaviour isnt BDSM. its being an abusive dick. Do not become the abusive dick.

Isn't being "dom" for males just normal?
Unless you are a cuck/beta you should have a natural tendecy to being "dom", it's called testosterone

Notice the difference between this guy : and that guy

is there any sort of forum where i can find GIRLS (dom or sub) that want to play with me via webcam?
maybe you can help

>If that makes sense

it's called "topping from the bottom".

It's something that happens. You have to tell your gf that you're eager to try, but that she shouldn't have lots of expectation for now and that she'll need to be patient, because noone becomes a good dom in days.

All I was stating was that a Dom doesn't play submissive for someone else. If you're willing to be submissive, you're not a Dom, you're a Switch. And depending on the "hardcore-ness" of the community you're speaking too, some of them don't believe that Switches are a real thing. I wasn't claiming anything about myself.

>If you want to be a Dom, you're not one
user is inaccurate. People who spout about being a "twoo dom" tend to shit on the lifestyle.

>No true Dom will ever be a sub for anyone
Case in point.

>Anyone can be a Dom. But to be a good Dom, you need experience.
This is accurate.

>Make some tacos
Second. Tacos for Sir.

>BDSM is about guidance, understanding, it's about helping a sub discovers herself, tutoring her, being firm ( and not being violent)
This is the shit. ...the violence part is not necessarily accurate.

For me, it didn't come naturally. ...until it did.

My honest suggestions would be to go on Fetlife and read like a motherfucker. Lurk like crazy. Ask questions without being an idiot, and try to have fun with scenarios in your head, make plans and see them through.

Also, remember that BDSM relationships are, first and foremost, RELATIONSHIPS.

...and read Screw the Roses; Send Me the Thorns.

No, the "normal" male is vanilla. A dom, a switch or a sub are completely different.
I am a switch more torwards dom, and nobody I've spoken with enjoy the things I do enjoy.
The kinkyest enjoy some rough sex...

As a note, for anyone wanting to know how NOT to do it, I can thoroughly reccommend reading Houseplants of Gor.

its hysterically bad.

just like the whole Gor bunch, really. If you ever hear that a dom is into Gor, Run. run a mile and keep going till you cant run any more. Then laugh at them.

it's not depending on the "hardcore-ness" it's depending on the "retard-ness".

The community you are speaking about are the same than this guy speaks about :
>Idiots who do the "I am dom! I Kneel before me, worm! Do my bidding, oh, what's your name?" thing rarely end up having actual partners. they end up as sad, angry Internet Doms trying to get the attention of inexperienced young girls/boys who dont realise how toxic their behaviour is - at least till the poor sub actually gets into contact with other subs, and quickly realises that their so-called dom is nothing but a prick with an abusive streak.

Dom and Sub are roles assumed in a relationship. Roles can change. They aren't an identity.

Look around in this thread, no one share your opinion, people with experience are laughing at your "true dom" shit.

Goreans are the fucking shit. Check out Sothar DragonHeart on You toob.

Fucking guy is hilarious!

>Look around in this thread, no one share your opinion, people with experience are laughing at your "true dom" shit.

next step he will try to explain to us that "safe word" are for casual, and that people who aren't 24/7 in their role aren't really into BDSM

With dom i meant the actual meaning of the word. Men domination in sex is normal for what i know, and of course i'm talking of vanilla sex. For example watch a normal vanilla porn video(supposed to look like reality), the man will control the woman, am i wrong? Of course the extreme is abnormal but men should always tend to domination.

There seems to be some sort of 'BDSM kool kids klub' thing which I really don't get.

Like, just do shit that you and your partner enjoy. End of story. Who gives a shit?

>But muh dom
>but muh this is serious bizzness
>but muh 'community'

> people with experience are laughing at your "true dom" shit.

Wow.

I'm impressed. you managed to read my post, and get EXACTLY the opposite to what I was stating.

Well done. you're very special.

I am not a Twue dom. Infact, I'm not a dom, I'm a switch. But I have spent oh, the last 18 or so years going to an assortment of fetish clubs, from the big name places like Torture Garden, down to the tiny wee local ones where its as much socialising with like-minded perverts and giggling at That Dom, (You know him. he wears leather trousers, no top, and has 23 different floggers clipped to his belt. And is medically incapable of smiling. Because being a Dom is Serious Business(tm)).

and the end result of all those years of hanging around in clubs with people who like to wear arse-less chappes is that know an awful lot of people, tops, bottoms, sub, dom, switch, and everything in between, and more importantly, learnt the importance of communication, care, consent and respect which I wrote about - all the things which "twue dom" types fail to observe - which is why I wrote about, and you completely managed to fail to comprehend, you muppet.

I might have stated things awkwardly because when i was speaking of "your true dom shit" i was referirng to the guy who was saying that "no true dom is a switch". Are you this guy ?

This nigga knows.

Check out this comic:
gardenhose.thecomicseries.com/archive/

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Ahha. that makes a bit more sense.

the way it sounded, it came over like you'd quoted my comment about care and respect etc,as if you thought that was someone saying "all true doms" etc.

which is pretty much the exact opposite of what I said.

Consider the muppet bit retracted.

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What you mean is not the domination as intended in bdsm, but yes, usually man take a more "active" role during sex, and yes, in terms of statistics men are more prone to be doms than women.
Still the bdsm dom is very different from from what you mean as the average vanilla "dom" man. Try to speak with a sample of the two and you will see

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Chelsea?

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My place with some of the furniture

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you know, every time I see a BDSM dungeon in a stone vault, I want to break every cliche my doing a bright, white bauhaus-inspired ultra-modern studio space with lots of lighting that can be adjusted, and loads of chrome and black ash furniture without an ounce of leather in sight.

S&M gear is just so fucking cliched at times.

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Lucky bastard. ....I don't even have a dungeon.

unfortunately i'm not the only one using the place so i can't do what i want in it when it comes to decoration.

Plus it would have been so expensive to change it from it's natural form (it's a basement).

Dom for 7 years, do you have any toys available?

What are her k ok nks?she's a sub and into dirty stuff? Well elaborate.

don't speak to his mother in that tone

And since we have to rent it to other people to afford it the classical look is something that was safer

He's right you know. That is exactly what my sub told me. She just told me I was a natural. I wasn't even looking for a sub.

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I recommend reading: Nana to kaoru manga it has some bdsm basics

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You're right, i meant that

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Whats her size?

i.e. height, weight.

I can give you advice from there

Actually, is her name Emily by chance? if so i might have information

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It's obscene the amount a "Dom" gets laid. Their typically fat and sweaty older dudes, routinely getting their dick wet with young, unstable "Subs" by manipulation and are worshipped by them. It's very pretentious. Read a book about it, find "Subs" on Fetlife, do "Dom" things, they tell their friends about you, get messages, repeat. Try it, it's silly, though, you will get laid and have fun. It's just fucking.