Ask a literal modern-day cowboy* anything.
*cowboy meaning someone (incidentally, from Texas in this case) who works on a cattle ranch and carries out the duties of an actual cowboy. As much as I'd love to be one, I'm not a gunslinger from a western.
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How many cans of chew do you go through in a day?
would you fuck a cow if nobody would find out?
Ever do horsebreaking?
can you strike a match from the sole of your boot and light a cigarette in a menacing way
how much do you make as a ranch hand?
How close to Amarillo are you? What kind of four-wheeler do you use, if you work on a large feedlot, I know you use one.
Nah. Even assuming bestiality wasn't taboo and I didn't have hangups about it just for that reason, they're too big and ugly and they smell like shit.
I moved from dip to cigarettes a few years back, and I've been cutting down on cigs. But when I used dip (my late teens to mid 20's), I think I averaged around a can a day or so.
how much you make a year?
what is it like to smell cow shit for more than 4 hours a day?
A bit more than 20 grand. The pay isn't too bad.
I can light a cig menacingly, but I can't do the first bit.
I grew up pretty far south of it (I was closer to the Mexican border than I was to it), but I'm not even in Texas anymore. I'm in Kansas now. And I used a regular Honda Rancher.
Nope. I've ridden a lot of horses, but they were all already trained. I've always found the idea of it interesting, but I haven't tried it yet.
It was really gross and annoying at first, but you do get used to it after a while. I don't care that much anymore.
What do you wear?
Bumpin' out of interest.
Please answer, cowboy man
On the job, usually a t-shirt, jeans, and trappers. Usually a baseball hat, and sometimes a bandana. As cool as it would be if we dressed like they did in the old west, that just isn't practical.
Am I the only one who thinks John Wayne stands like a woman and talks like faggot?
(Leans against the wall with Palm up against hip, 'howdy pilgrim' kek)
Only reason he didn't wear makeup is cause his pretty boy boypussi skin was so feminine he didn't need any
Oh and, Clint Eastwood ftw
Kek.
I don't think he acted or talked like a faggot himself, but he's literally the only person who can do what he did without being one in my eyes. Every impression of him I've seen - including accurate ones - are worthy of a good kek.
I'm more a fan of Clint than I am of him, but I picked him for the OP because... well, honestly, I don't know. I consider him more a quintessential cowboy than Eastwood, even if I don't like him as much.
Will you become the deadliest gun in the west, with a draw too quick to see, hunting his bounties in horseback, living and dying by the gun?
How many notches are on your revolver?
I wish, but unfortunately not :/
how often do you fantasize about defending your ranch from a sudden attack by native americans
None. While I do actually own a revolver, it isn't marked up.
Not native americans, but I honestly fantasize maybe a couple times a month about defending it from roving gangs of outlaws and rustlers.
Not serious, Don Quixote style flights of imagination, though. Just idly thinking "how cool would that be".
Tell me the name on the grave, OP
...
DeMarcus Washingplex.
what's your take on the code of the west?
It basically boils down to "don't be a cunt".
Most things just kinda fall into that from there.
Also holy shit, I just saw that I got satanic cowboy quads lol