ITT: We help lesser countries cope with being dominated by us

So here we are at yet another Olympics, another country, and once again we are dominating.

I visited Sup Forums the other night and noticed the salt was very real, and the

>"MUH CAPITA"

excuse, which doesn't hold up, was everywhere

So I thought we'd take a few moments to help the rest of the world relieve their salt by helping them come up with new, original excuses for being dominated by the greatest country on earth.

I'll start:

>"I only care about gold in "X" sport, so those are the only medals that matter"

>it's 2016 and moon racing isn't a sport.

Fuck can you imagine rockets lined up ready for blasting off on their race to the moon and back?

But that would be just yet another sport we'd be the only ones good at

maybe even the only ones to participate!

Fuck we completely dominate

American athletes are the only ones who dope is my favorite this olympics

>ameriswims

>live on island
>isn't gold in swimming

Am surprised Spain are doing so well t b h. They're above New Zealand!

USA will lose the apehoop gold medal match against Australia thus losing the Olympics forever. Cap this post

considering GB's smaller population i'm really impressed with how many medals they have. Is there a term for this phenomenon?

No one cares about the Olympics and its meme sports.

Football is back nigger

yes it's called getting CRUMPETED

Cycling

you dominate... at swimming, that's most of it.

except, no, did you even watch gymnastics?

Gay Germany, what the fuck are you even doing over there?

Pay attention!!

I'm happy with 3rd after the shit show and Sup Forums bullying of the first few days

I'm sorry for bullying you bro

I'm too impressed . You'd think Germany would be I'm third or something - good job

Doping

Funding

We invented boats thousands of years ago m8, no need to swim anymore.

Are other countries even trying?

>29 out of 52 medals are swimming
>that's more than 50%

Gay.....Germany.....

>his country stacks in swimming to pad their stats

you guys do realise it doesnt actually matter that swimming has 'more medals'?

Europe > USA

>burgers on suicide watch

What do you mean? Amerifats are only good at Athletics and Swimming and there are a billion events for both of those so therefore they win disproportionate medals. Pretty simple

Yeah? Why cause you guys beat us the first time around...

yay the kiwis got another gold

Don't go so doopin' mental Teddy, no one gives a crud

It does when a single GOAT athlete can win 80% of the swimming events. There are no 125, 150, or 75 meter sprints for Bolt to win pointless extra medals in.

>american """"banter""""

Shut the fuck up and get back to picking my coffee beans you piece of shit

Seven gold for Germany, when did this happen?

>It does when a single GOAT athlete can win 80% of the swimming events

Daily reminder that staying salty and making excuses will not produce a GOAT athlete to aid world domination in olympic gold medals

git gud and train your athletes and maybe one day you can come close to competing with the Grandmaster Greatest Country On Earth US Of A

>though not likely :^)

>There are no 125, 150, or 75 meter sprints for Bolt to win pointless extra medals in.
So?

We got humiliated in 1996 so hard with our 1 (ONE) gold that it became a source of national embarrassment.

Turns out that's a great way to get government funding in sports.

Swimming should only give 1/4th of a medal progression.

8*

Maybe yuropoors suck so much at swimming because their water is so fucking salty

Ah, so this is the american banter i've heard so much about.

I think Brazil is headed in that direction this year with their 1 (ONE) gold medal

I don't think this will improve their funding, though

>have the best swimmer in the world
>get five medals

>have the best discus-thrower in the world (for example)
>get one medal

Smh like I don't know man.

Fucking North Korea has more medals than us.

Instead of being a salty bitch why not train a better swimmer, then?

Come on krautz, it's not rocket science

kek

>every country that is not the Grandmaster Greatest Country On Earth US Of A btfo

you'd think they would understand the concept.
germans are smart, right?

>Amerifats building working rockets without nazis holding their hands

>4 swimming events, 41 total events 100 years ago

>34 swimming events, 300+ total events now

It's still the same ratio, but with 1-3 countries so dominant in the professon, it appears to be unfair now that there is so many events now at the Olympics

Yeah, maybe we should revive that eugenetics program again.

...

>70+ years later
>still mad

Not our fault your country turned into such a shithole during that period that all your best scientists came to us

Also, not our fault you suck at war and lost, hanz. To the victor belong the spoils.

Being a salty bitch won't change any of this, krautz

>who is Robert Goddard

Also who invented the airplane?

but swimming in salt water is easier, ameridumb

>germans making bird suits and jumping off of tall structures while the wright brothers actually fly
>germany pls

I think it seems unfair because one person can win so many events, so one goat can cean up (Phelps is the 10th ranked country at these Olympics). Things like judo, weightlifting etc have loads of events but competitiors are divided by weight so can't win much, and stuff like rowing it is impossible to compete in more than 2 races max even though there are loads of medals on offer.

In a way, this just shows that the medals table is a bit pointless anyhow, as for example the mens 100m sprint is given the same weighting as the womens 10m air rifle.

Yeah? Well whose fault is that?

Maybe next time there's a world war you shouldn't let the Russians curb stomp and flatten you and split your country in half, totally and utterly humiliating you

Thats how it should be, but the world has a big emphasis on entertainment. Seeing somone run/swim really fucking fast is more alluring than any good marksmanship and thus is rated as more important despite it not being the case.

>In a way, this just shows that the medals table is a bit pointless anyhow

That's a good excuse, Chaucer, I will add it to the list of excuses you cucks can make when being dominated by the Grandmaster Greatest Country On Earth US Of A

So Jamaica is behind the USA in the ranking.
It's not that hard Tommy.

Gustav Weißkopf did.

lol, what the fuck is that thing? that is not an airplane you jackass

The medals table [i]is[/i] pointless and completely meaningless. The only thing it measures is how effective your fucking organising bodies are, which nobody is interested in except themselves.

Europe (Britain, Germany, France) has more medals than USA with less population.

embarrassing post

please delete

>which nobody is interested in except themselves

What did he mean by this?

Congrats USA with milking the medal heavy sport just like we do with ice skating in winter.

I'm just happy we literally have the most qts

It means nobody except the british olympics funding board and related people are interested in how they are structured and apportion fund.


fundamentally the point is the medals table means the square root of fuck all and seeing niggerchimps posting about it all the time is dull.

Tell that to the passengers of the Titanic

Pur crapita

delete your life pal

>tfw 3rd

ooooouchhhh

If you were on Sup Forums during the 2012 olympics I seem to remember the Eurocuck's excuse when being dominated by the Grandissimo Grandmaster Greatest of All Countries On Earth US Of A was that they couldn't be counted individually

They started pooling their medals as the European Union, but I guess that would be stupid now because of #Brexit

Not that the eurocucks wouldn't do something because it's stupid We already listed this excuse and determined it's not valid

We're trying to come up with new excuses for when the Grandissimo Grandmaster Greatest of All Countries On Earth US Of A dominates you, come on geoffrey think outside the box

only thing that matters is beating our neighbours

>Who is Adam Peaty

In our case it's finishing above the French and the Aussies. Finishing above Ireland is an obvious given.

Chile only dreams now.
T. Australia

That's a good excuse too, swedish meatball


I'll add it to the list of excuses you can make when the Grandissimo Grandmaster Greatest of All Countries On Earth US Of A dominates you at the olympics

Good ideas, keep them coming fellas

Are you implying that the athletic ability of a country's athletes is irrelevant and that the medal county only comes down to how organized a country's Olympic administrators are? Because it seems like that's where you're going with this.

Dolla dolla bill y'all

Then have your country train an elite swimmer! Whats so hard to understand about that? Your country will be underwater in 30 years anyway so it would probably be of good use.

Pretty sure Phelps has a lower population than europe

>Are you implying that the athletic ability of a country's athletes is irrelevant
Yes. Despite what memers say they are not competing for 'team gb' to win 'team gb the most medals and win the olympics'

Well then learn how to swim bitch boy

thanks obama

>Best Korea
>5 medals
umm, sir? we're gonna have some vacancies in the camps...

>Despite what memers say they are not competing for 'team gb' to win 'team gb the most medals and win the olympics'

Ok that makes it into the list of excuses you can make when the Grandissimo Grandmaster Greatest of All Countries On Earth US Of A dominates you

Good stuff
good stuff

Keep them coming, britain, so far you're the best at coming up with excuses

I don't have any medals and never will have m8

Saved

Please explain how it's not the case that better athletes win more medals.

Shut the fuck up Texas, you don't get your own flag

Get back in the union and start flying the 50 stars again

>
>

They do, aggregating them means nothing.

>germans are smart, right?

lolno

Are you saying our athletes are deliberately finishing 4th and 5th in their events just to spite their teammates?

Brace yourselves for Mexico's gold rush in 2036.

>aggregating them [medals] means nothing

Ok added one more to the list of excuses you make when the Grandissimo Grandmaster Greatest of All Countries On Earth US Of A
dominates you


Keep 'em coming

Yes, but I'm trying to figure out *why* you think it doesn't mean anything. The Olympics is an international competition. It makes sense to count the number of medals each country wins in order to compare them. Assuming you're saying that it's all about each country's administrative abilities, I'm asking for *evidence* of that.