Three years ago

>three years ago
>really drunk
>post my number on Sup Forums asking someone to call me and tell me a story til i fall asleep
>this bald mother fucker right here calls me
>tells me a story about a bear who switches places with a human for a day
>many keks til i fall asleep
>becomes a weekly ritual
>time goes on and its less stories and more general conversation
>three years later hes getting married
>asks me to be the best man in his wedding
>whythefucknot.jpg
>fly up the coast to stay at his house for the weekend
>friends and family all know 'of' me so its kinda weird
>but everyones really fucking chill especially his friends

probably one of the best weekends of my life, all thanks to Sup Forums.

and to think i was gonna axe murder him.

what a gay story

You psychotic son of a bitch. Wow. Just...wow.

Axe murdering is way too bloody and leaves far too much evidence such as DNA at the crime scene.

You should have shot him through a pillow or just stabbed him with a knife bought at a pawn shop. Then throw the knife down the sewer or into a river.

can he murder you instead

0/10 standards

Who would marry that bald fuck?

Do it OP. Use plastic wrap, and burn everything in a tub of thermite.

nah
I'm planning to kill myself before my next birthday anyway
probably do what i can to make it look like an accident so the insurance pays off

Someone 4 everyone

you're a gay story

can i pee in your mouth first though

hes a pretty amazing guy from what I've learned over the years (and of course this weekend).

his girlfriends hella hot too its crazy. the story of how they met was great, i got to help with the speech for it.

can you not, please? i will miss your gay cock

Can you at least try to hit puberty before writing stupid shit? thank you.

how can you be the best man at your own wedding...

meant to say 'groomsman' but your comment still doesn't make any sense.

nah man, puberty is for fags

But who was phone?!

I remember that thread. Three years that was? Fuck, time flys.

U first NIGGER

>i was totally around three years ago in at 2am that one time

seriously tho

she's going to divorce him when she finds out that he has been sleeping with other men.

this is not the heartwarming thread i was expecting.

Is disappoint?

Very Heart-Warming,Will you tell use the bear story OP?

w-wait .. y-you want to pee in my mouth Daddy?

i dont think he'd be comfortable with that as he wants to post it wherever he posts it.

>this is not the heartwarming thread i was expecting.

It's goddamned Sup Forums. If you want fucking care bears and rugrats you can go watch abc family. asshole.

just for that i'm posting pornography.

select all squares with your dumbass remark.

Why the fuck does Timmy Turner has a man-gina

he wished to be a girl, its not hard to figure out. its from a comic called camp sherwood.

i recommend it. im gay myself, but the plot itself is worth it.

plus if ur a straight pedophile it fulfills a lot of fantasies.

tell us the story of how he met his wife?

I remember it too

He was at a strip club and she was one of the dancers. She had shaved her pubic hair into an arrow pointing up.

Wow thats so fucking romantic, What hapened after that? Did they fuck in the bathroom?

0/10
Doesn't even match ops writing style

basically they first met when they were 12 years old. it was at a swim meet. he walked up to the girl next to her and gave her a hug. they introduced themselves, but were pretty much in different.

they saw each ohter in passing a lot after that, cuz its a small town, but never really hung out or anything.

they both got invited to the same wedding, and were supposed to go out with the whole gang of friends the night beofre, but literally everyone else didn't show up. so they talked. it was supposed to be just one night of hanging out but they ditched the wedding and spent the next three days together. been together ever since.

i remember when he first started talking about her i never really expected to escalate to this.

Gay
How she looks is something I want to see more

>meeting a girl is gay

I'm not long for this world.

Wow Thats so fucking romantic, Did they fuck in the swim meet bathroom?

Gay story

>Thinking you can't be tracked through the purchase of a pawnshop

Why couldnt he just purchase a axe at walmart or home depot??

Because buying an axe is for noob faggots. Buy a shovel and sharpen it. Less suspicious.

fucking in a bathroom?
>implying there was no janitor closet somewhere

Would buying a katana off e-bay seem suspicious?