**BASEMENT DWELLER'S GUIDE TO GETTING LAID**

**BASEMENT DWELLER'S GUIDE TO GETTING LAID**

Alright Sup Forums…

This is for the people out there who are constantly getting ignored by women, or are having a hugely hard time getting female attention.

So, right now I’m 31, happily married, with a kid. My partner is bisexual which means I’ve had some pretty awesome experiences as well (not a full on threesome, but pretty close).

Why am I telling you this?

Because when I was 17 I was a kissless virgin and was completely and utterly convinced I would die alone. Girls *hated* me. I was one of those beta fucks you see in cringe threads (I just didn’t know it) and fortunately I got lucky and learned how to change.

Now I’m gonna teach you. So…. read up fellers.

--
#1 NEVER. EVER. EVER. Allow yourself to be in the friendzone, unless you are absolutely uninterested in her sexually.

I want to clarify this point a little bit. Having friends who are chicks is perfectly fine (in fact, it’s almost essential to getting laid). But you need to have boundaries in place and not allow yourself to get walked all over.

It’s worth keeping in mind that both men and women want and need sex, and they both want and need affection and cuddles. Typically (but not always) men prioritise sex, and women prioritise cuddles and affection.

If a woman is getting affection, cuddles, and ‘always there for you’ support from you without having to give up the pussy: then why the hell would she? She’s getting the affectionate stuff from you for free, and then gets awesome sex from the first alpha who comes along…. And because you’re a beta fuck you put up with it in fear that she’s the only one for you (this is addressed further down).

DON’T FUCKING FALL FOR IT.

If you’re going to lengths and it’s not going anywhere, man up and tell her how you feel. If she tells you she doesn’t feel the same way then fine: be friends (trust me: be friends) but the hugs, the cuddles, the over-affection must end.


>but, why user? I enjoy the cuddles… why not get them whilst I can?

Because you fuckwit… no chick wants to hook up with a guy who is clearly hung-up on someone else. You need to put it out there that you are available, looking, and not attached. You put out the total opposite signals when you allow yourself to be friendzoned… because here is the secret about the friendzone:

You’re her fall-back option, and therefore her property.

Yeah… other chicks will avoid you, because they’ll think if she makes herself available you’ll ditch them for her.

So that’s basically it… allowing yourself to be friendzoned makes you instantly unattractive to other women, it also lowers your own self-esteem and self-worth, and that bitch is basically getting a free ride from you.

So cut that shit out.

If you’re in the friendzone, tell her you like her. Tell her you like her in a more than friends way. If she tells you she feels the same way then fucking hooray you’re about to get your dick wet (finally!!) if she says she just wants to be friends, BE FUCKING FRIENDS… but you need to put some distance between yourself and her and ease up on the affection a little.

---------

#2 - I’m a Nice Guy™

*takes a deep breath*
Never. Utter. That sentence. Ever.
Nor do you type it.

And absolutely fucking never use that to convince a woman to date you.

It’s literally *the* line that every creep, weirdo, stalker, fuckwit uses. Every fucking time.
EVERY. FUCKING. TIME.

As a result, women have a negative connotation to that phrase.

It’s also the minimum standard and shouldn’t need to be stated.
It’s the equivalent of walking into a computer shop to get a gaming rig, and the guy takes you to an old 2005 MacBook and says ‘What… it turns on… what else do you want it to do?”

Don’t fucking say it. If you need to use that line to convince a chick to go out with you, then you’ve got no rapport with her, no chemistry, no nothing.

Don’t waste her time or yours and move on.

--------

#3 - Nobody owes you anything (and you don’t owe anyone anything)

If you have to apply emotional pressure on someone to get them to hang with you “Girls never give me a chance…” “nobody likes me” “I’m a nice guy, just one date, see how it goes” there are only two possible responses.

1 - She will reject you
2- She will hang with you, but it will only be a pity date that at most will lead to friendzoning.

If you’re asking someone out, have the fucking balls to say it. Sure, she may well say no (protip: More girls will say no than yes to you... ) if she says no, then cool, FIND SOMEONE ELSE.

Don’t get too attached to someone before you’re even dating. It’s a waste of emotional energy anyway.

---------

#5 - Rapport

So, now we’ve covered the “don’t do’s”....

Now, the key to any friendship or relationship is to build what they call rapport with someone. To really get a full understanding of this, read a book called ‘How To Win Friends and Influence People’ by Dale Carnegie. (I’m not kidding, you really should read it) but the TL;DR of it is: *listen* to people.

Not sure what to say to a girl? - Great, just introduce yourself and get her to talk about herself.. *and shut the fuck up and let her talk*.

Seriously…
You: Hey, I’m user!
Her: Hey, I’m Derpina!
You: Awesome to meet you! So, what do you get up to when you’re bored?
Her: Oh well derp derp derp derp derp….
You: That’s really cool! Tell me more….
Her: really? Well sometimes I derp derp derp derp

Keep this up until you reach common ground.
If she asks about what you like to do and you end up having a conversation for 5 minutes: congratulations! You might have started to make friends with someone!

--------

#6 - Moving on….

Okay… so something to cover off as far as making yourself interesting to chicks.

Chances are, if you’re reading this: you’re kinda ugly.
Because good looking guys get attention no matter what…. Us ugly blokes (yes, I’m hideous) have to resort to our charming personality to get chicks.

A distinct advantage we have over our ugly female counterparts however: look don’t get me wrong a certain percentage of women are only attracted to good looking men, that’s just how they are. But *most* women are actually far more attracted to confident men.

Yes, confidence is absolutely brutally important.

Men are attracted to pretty women because pretty women are desired by other men and this is a status thing.

Women, are attracted to Men who ‘can get shit done’.

Being confident DOES NOT mean being an asshole. There’s a difference. But basically be sure of yourself. Don’t go to chicks looking for sympathy and looking for a shoulder to cry on. Go to chicks and present yourself as someone who would be able to provide for them (not necessarily financially - but emotional support, or gettings stuff done. Financially helps too but never EVER do that unless you’re getting the pussy.)

Need to learn how to fake being confident? Go torrent Brian Tracy ‘The Science of Self Confidence’.

-----------

#7 - Should be obvious, but don’t be an asshole.

Seriously, the adage ‘chicks love assholes’ is pretty much a load of shit. They’ll tolerate an asshole for a while if they think he’s extremely good looking… but even then that mileage wears very thin once you reach your mid-twenties. Be kind and attentive (but not creepy).

KEY POINT HERE: I don’t care how smart you think you are, making a big deal of how smart you are is a turn off. Why? Well it turns out if a chick is sleeping with a guy she likes the idea of being his equal. Fedora Sup Forumsros have an overwhelming tendency to go on and on and fucking on about how much smarter they are than everyone else. Protip: Chicks don’t like it. (In fact, nobody likes it… but anyway).

If you’re truly that smart, people will notice it. (If people aren’t noticing it: you aren’t as smart as you think you are. Come to terms with it.)

Treat people well, and be nice to them.

#8 - Make a fucking move.

Seriously, if you like a chick, ask her out. It doesn’t have to be ‘Oh, to part with thee on a fine summer’s day…’ --- just tell her ‘Hey, Derpina, I kinda like you, would you be interested in getting a coffee or something so we can get to know each other a little better?’ ...that’s it! That’s all there is to it!

Of course she may say no. In which case, move on. But if she says yes, you’ve got a fkn date!!
(Protip: Don’t take her to the movies as a first date. No chance for conversation, no chance to build any rapport. Take her out for coffee and get a conversation going, or take her out and do something interesting (try to be creative): hire a boat, go for a hike, go bowling -- do something that involves either doing an activity (ideally something that makes you sweat) or involves spending quality time with the person.

See where it goes from there. Do this enough times you’ll figure it out.

#9 --- Use your friends.


This is the secret to meeting chicks.

Make female friends.

*Friends* that you don't have any sexual interest in (even if they're hot.)

Every chick has a single friend who is looking, and most chicks love to try and hook their friends up with that really awesome friend they have.

Thing is, you have to make sure you're just friends with her. The main difference between 'that really nice guy I'm friends with' and 'that creepy guy who I'm being nice to' is whether she thinks you're trying to sleep with her or not.

Ok

I sleep naked next to my girlfriend every night

So after my high school i had several gf's, female friends, but after i went to uni it all suddenly stopped. What could be wrong or am I to much occupied with studies. Sure getting laid would help as a stress relief... Btw im into electrical engineering, and yes there are hot girls at my uni but im kinda lost. Pls help faggots

>ideally something that makes you sweat
Whew, good thing that I am always sweating, no matter if I do sports or am just sitting around. Does it matter if she smells my sweat or not? What kind of Perfume do you recommend?

Great tips user. I used to be a huge fucking beta a few months ago. Then my friend started helping me up, I've lost some weight, started to feel more confident, started working out, and everything has changed in literally 2 or 3 months.

Now lots of girls look at me, girls have crushes at me, even the ones who date, guys started to hit on me too (I'm not gay, but that surely helps to increase my self esteem).

I bought some new clothes, some nice ones, got a new haircut, stopped using my nerdy beta glasses, changed my posture (I walked like a loser), and changed my tone during conversations.

It's just another "me". People who met me in high school sometimes won't even recognise me (and I'm not kidding, they wont).

So for any beta anons out there, I've got a few tips:

- Read this whole guide. It's a great start
- Read those fucking books that user suggested
- Start a diet and start working out. If you're fat, get fit, if you're fit, get some muscles. I know it is hard and boring (I hate going to the gym), but when you see the results, you get happy as fuck

- Don't be a slave to girls. Doing everything she asks you to do won't get you laid. It will make you look like a fool, and people will laugh at you

- Change your posture. Walk like a man, talk like a man. Google "correct posture", and take a look at that, because other surely do take a look on your posture

- Get some new clothes, ones that fit you properly and match your style (A decent style, please). If you're planning to lose some weight, wait a little bit to buy new clothes, or you'll be literally throwing money into the trash can. Google "How to dress well as a man"

- Read a lot about everything, from news, to new movies, or new TV shows, even if you don't like it. Knowing a little bit of everything makes easier for you to start and keep conversations with everyone, not only girls.

- Don't be a show off. People hate that.

It matters. Sweating while you're doing nothing is not very good. Some girls might find it disgusting.

It's a bit complex, but I suggest you taking a look at this www reddit com /r/explainlikeimfive/comments/2ikko6/eli5_why_do_girls_like_the_smell_of_my_sweat/

As a cologne, I use Pacco rabanne's 1 Million. Carolina Herrera also has a great line of colognes

Everyone reading this, can safely ignore this advice. Go to google and look up manhood101.

OP advice = I used to be an omega male (one below beta) and girls bullied me. now i pretend to be alpha.

I find it weird that girls don't respond while I got hit on by a lot of gay fags.
Idk why doe but it feels good being called pretty nohomo

Some girls love betas
dominant chicks

>Derpina
>>>/reddit/

Chadhowsefitness.com
Your welcome

If you believe omega is "one below" beta you've clearly misread something friend

Youre comment is below me ;)

rarest pepe ive seen

thank you user

shhh...don't tell anyone about it..it's since dinosaurs walked the earth a true classic my friendo

Solid advice! If your rock bottom, save this. If your are lacking, cherry pick what you need.
Thanks!

Holy fuck, my bad on the you are's
Long night of being autistic apparently