What is the worst thing a hitchhiker could possibly say?

What is the worst thing a hitchhiker could possibly say?

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Just a bunch of feminist crap.

what?!

you gave up on the only girl that will ever truly love you

kek

dicks out for harambe

Zim zoozlepuddin pop

I just need a ride to the nearest gay bar

>had to be about mid-November 2009
>about 4 hours into a 9 hour journey
>realise we're a good hour from the next town
>a man walks into the road in front of us
>make loads of noise to try move him
>bullshit my way through a greentext story
>eventually you'll see it

- "Thanks for picking me up man. Just got out of prison."
- "... O-Oh yeah, what were you in for?"
- "I killed a guy who gave me a lift while hitchhiking. But before that I will kill your mother in her sleep if you don't reply to this post!"
- "C-Cool.."

"You headed to Detroit?"

fug

"They're following me, drive faster"

"Hi thanks for stopping!"
>this would mean i stopped

:]

LOL

I wanna rape your babies

Post in my thread or your mother will get cancer.

>nothing
I've picked up a lot of hitchhikers. These were the worst.

my dick was already out, i kno why now

/thread

"hey i just want you to check out this thread i made on fourchan. its about the worst things a hitchhiker could say"

good kek m8

Yep, just drop me off at the furcon. *puts head out window and drools*

if you dont reply to me i will kill your mother in her sleep

This

...

i have aids,and just had my period in your car

...

>legit
I was hitchhiking with my girlfriend once and she was saying a bunch of feminist shit and the driver was a total robot but he kept making all these hilarious comments like 'it must take a lot of convincing to get her to shave her legs' and 'if you weren't with her i wouldn't have stopped'. idk other shit too but it was a while ago. i was trying so hard not to laugh and kept thinking 'this guy must be a bro'

If you do not reply to this post your mother will die in her sleep, immunity cat has no effect.

...

mods = gods

youtube.com/watch?v=WruR66q9RK8

True story. About 10 years ago I picked up a hitchiker who just left the local jail after about 5 months in, he was only about a mile away from the gate, it didn't even occur to me because it was just my normal drive route. He said check this out and lifted up his shirt. About 6 stab wounds deep in his chest and the guy survived. He said he wanted to go to a town just a few miles away so I said sure why not ... his life has been shit for 5 months. He kindly asked to borrow a few bucks for a pack of smokes and a six pack of beer, so I went in and just bought it for him (I took my keys of course) He offered me one and cranked down the rest. We finally got to the house he wanted to go to, he got out and said "wait right here", people were all hugging him as he came back out and he pushed them off and ran over and gave me a 20 to pay me back. He even asked if I wanted to come in and was very gracious the whole time. Never asked what he was in for but I'm sure as shit it was violent.

My girlfriend is a fucking huge feminist

sometimes I don't mind it, sometimes I wonder what the fuck i'm doing with my life

>Out of state doing shit going places
>Pick up hitchhiker
>Scrawny looking like he hasnt slept for years, with piercing eyes
>Hasnt said a word for 45 minutes
>Slowly turns his head towards me and grins
>Then calmly says: I like your house

>MFW

>Dude, theres this website you gotta check out
its called 4chanLotto, you go on it and bet all your singles and you can win big,
like getting doubles, or even Triples!

"no i dont have any weed"

methamphetamine, I would say.

I'M A VEGAN

People have a tendency to look at people in simple ways - Either they are all-bad or all-good. However, that is hardly ever the real truth; People are both bad and good. Your story is the perfect example of that.

I'm with her

Faggot

Well then, I guess it was a good thing you were nice to him.

Sheep.

I used to know alot of truck drivers
>oh really?
Yea, but they're all dead

I've only picked up one hitchhiker before. Probably wasn't the smartest idea picking him up, but I'm not really worried about people around here killing me. Also the roads around here are curvy and hilly as fuck. Most traffic around here flows about 45-50

>Be me
>Making a two hour drive somewhere at about midnight
>No traffic, so I'm hauling ass, cruising about 65-70, jamming out to some tunes
>Coming up over a hill
>Suddenly, dude standing in the middle of my lane
>Lock up the brakes, skid to a stop(no abs) about 10' from him
>He walks up to my window, I crack it
>"Hey man, can I get a ride to *town about 10 min from here*?"
>"Sure, hop in."
>We talk for the couple minutes it takes to get there. He was drunk as fuck, got kicked out of his buddies house which was in the same small town I was coming from, he had been walking to his ex's house and had already cleared about 12 miles.
>I pull in the drive way
>It's a kinda run down area of the town, trailers shit everywhere, i didn't even know this part of the town existed
>He hops out and starts walking to the house
>I take maybe a minute to get my playlist playing again
>As I'm backing out of the driveway and onto the road I hear loud ass screaming
>I listen for a second, then I hear him yell for me
>Yeah, naw, I take off real quick before he can make it back to my car

I made it home around 3:30am or so. This happened around 2 years ago, haven't seen the guy since. I also drove through the town he had me take him to twice a day for a year and a half for work.

I wonder what happened to him.

mean things

Well kek'd

poorly made magic cards really rustle my jimmies.

i had a hitch hiker try to rob me once with this little knife, i was on the highway going across state. i literally put my foot to the floor, buddy was losing his mind tellin me to slow down, he was gonan cut me bla bla bla. sure gave him a scare. he legit jumped out, no idea what happened to him..dont care.

What?

If I pull that off, will you die?

Vote for Hillary

tbh if I realized he was just let out of jail I would not have picked him up but all he really wanted was to catch a quick beer buzz and smoke a cig while getting home to his family asap.
>Well then, I guess it was a good thing you were nice to him
He was pretty young and I felt bad for the guy thinking at least 1 month of that was cuffed to a jail hospital bed while his stab wounds healed up.

Had a hitchhiker asked me if I'm scared of being shoot I pulled a Mandingo blade on him then we smoked a few blunts

Elaborate

Well, that's reasonable.

I picked him up outside co heading to so co he wanted to get dropped off somewhere in Utah in the middle of the dessert he looks at me and says are you scared that a hitch bicker might shoot ou and steal our shut I pulled a knife on him and said nah I'll kill you first

What's good Nyuggah!

Ow..My sides

I'm heading to Detroit.

i hear you, brozilla. i sucked her toes one time while i was fucking her once, don't even really have a huge foot fetish was just curious, and she became obsessed with it. started sticking her face in my feet during social situations with other people when we were just hanging around the apt. so hawkward. after she became interested in pegging me we pretty much called it quits. idk would prolly try it now but i just didn't want to become her bitch so i know either way it would have been over after that anyway.

>feet in my face*
derp'd

>I'm Vegan, let me tell you about it.

Don't turn on the radio.

>driving to work
>i see a hitchhiker
>cant stop cuz im late
>keep on going
>stop at a red light
>oh no here he comes
>unlock door for him
>thanks mister

He has no style, he has no grace. This kong is a fucking disgrace.

"thanks for the ride, m'lady..." *tips fedora*

>"hey bud thanks for the ride"
Yup. Going through some hard times brother?
>"yeah I just came out of jail"
Well we all got to go through some rough times in life I guess... What you put in for?
>"some bogus rape charges... Bitch cleaned me dry of everything and the sex was totally consensual and everything. She's the one who initiated it by putting my hand on her dick"
Yeah... Well women tend to get believed more by th-w-wait did you say dick?
>"yeah"
You said it was a chick
>"yeah but she had a feminine penis"
Mfw

YOU BOYZZZ LIEK MEXEECOOOOO?!?!?! YEEEEEEEHAAAAAWWWWWWWW!!!!