Story time Sup Forums

Story time Sup Forums

> Be a waiter
> Serve food to this one table
> One of them tells me: "The octopus was exquisite"
> mfw we did not serve any octopus that evening

Continue?

please

sure

I fucking hate faggots that don't write the whole story in the first post, even if they have dubs.

just post the story and go

yes, but only if you don't post "continue?" after every post. just post the story or don't.

Trick story.
OP is octupus

Post the story

Post the whole shit already

What is the mystery about the octopus?

C'mon OP, go on

...

zzz

STAY BRIGHT PUPPER

Nig off fucker.

More I guess
Nothing else to do

Stay bright pupper, ignore this nigger >703103500

Sorry about that, sooooo

> Remain calm, try not to laugh
> My face spasms like a oedipus
> He seems concerned
> "W..what's wrong?"
> Let a snort out and mumble "Nothing"
> Go to the kitchen and tell the the story
> No one knows what we served them
> Weirdest keks ever

Got more stories if you want

>tries to be oldfag
>703103500

> be waiter
> Father comes in, asks if he can choose his waitress, picks me
> "why don't you have French dressing, son? "

It's an Italian restaurant, dad.

My turn
>Be me
>Be yesterday
>Walk into a burger king
>Applying for a job
>Gets told that I am hired
>wtf i didnt even have to ask
>Turns out, I am the only white guy who works there
>Dont give a fuck
>But this one big black dude
>You know the kind
>Gold teeth, bad breath, bad attitude
>Asks me what I define as Nigger
>Maximum kek engaged
>Tell them that To me, a nigger is not a color, but simply a man who refuses to take care of his kids
>Guys asks me if I called him a nigger
>I did

Moar of this? Let me know

yes keep going

>be me
>Carrying a plate of food to a booth
>Tilt plate wrong and pour a bowl of peas into a woman's dress
>Apologise profusely and avoid the table for the rest of the night

> Serve a couple of large women
> One of them asks me if I could make them some "Bread Light"
> So many what's going through my brain
> It shows on my face
> I ask them "A what?"
> They look at me as if I come from planet Mars
> One replies
> "You know, some roast bread"
> Still, so many questions
> She continues explaining
> "See, when the bread is roasted, it looses lots of carbs and becomes light"
> Do a dead inside face and exclaim an "Oh" of enlightenment
> Enter kitchen and my sides enter orbit

...

bumping

One last, of those that come to mind now

> A couple of old grandmas are sitting and eating their food
> One of them stands up with a plate and comes to me
> "Can I help you?"
> "Yes, I would like to return that fish"
> scan the plate, nothing seems out of place
> "Why, what's wrong?"
> "It has bones"

Go to eat at some truck stop
>cutey waiter
> dont know how to ask her out
>ignore her because i can save my money and become stable in life before making another mistake
>give her my money tip her 2 bucks
>die a little inside as i leave

No female likes being asked out/hit on while they're working, you made the right choice

You're just ugly as shit. Handsome dudes hitting on working girls comes of as charming.

I don't remember giving you permission to reply to me.

>ask waitress for a table
>one on the balcony, please
>right by the EDGE

checked and copypasta from another user:

>be me
>work service at family style chain restaurant
>busy night, things going well
>one table has girl with down syndrome
>taking their order
>she asks for a salad, no tomato
>just casually say to myself
>"no tomato for the potato"
>utter silence, everyone looking at me
>mfw

Hey Shadow, long time no see! These black creatures really mean business!

>I don't remember giving you permission to reply to me.

Thats got to be the stupidest comeback I've ever heard on Sup Forums.

...

Sorry OP, I'm hijacking this thread.

ITT: we make fun os this idiot Holy shit no wonder girls don't like when you talk to them.

so hows your first day here, then?

Hey can i reply to your post? oh wait..

Holy shit I legit cringed on that...

>answer phone while serving a customer to stop it ringing
>Hello Location NameOfRestaurant this is user speaking.
>"I'd like to order a takeaway."
>Sure, can I just put you on hold for a moment while I finish serving a customer?
>Silence.wav
>...hello?
>Not directed at me "Didn't even wait for me to fucking answer just put me on hold I didn't say yes."
>Wellfuckyoutoobitch.jpg
>Hang up
>Stop answering phones for the rest of the night

Don't you got homework to do? Also learn what a hyperbole is. How do you even solve captchas?

funny how the guy who wanted no replies got the most of em

Screen Cap

then /sage

I don't know know what a noun is..
GED fag here

even this guy would pity you

>The guy looks around, and tries to shove me out of his way
>He trips when I move aside before he touches me
>I stare at him in the floor and asked him
>Did you drop the soap NIGGA!?
>Shitstorm
>People start screaming and hollering
>I just stand there
>Worth it

...

>The guy looks around, and tries to shove me out of his way
>He trips when I move aside before he touches me
>I stare at him in the floor and asked him
>Did you drop the soap NIGGA!?
>Shitstorm
>People start screaming and hollering
>I just stand there
>Worth it
>tfw your post gets deleted

kek thanks user

>I was only 9 years old
>I loved Bonzi Buddy so much, I had all the merchandise and spyware
>I pray to Bonzi every night before bed, thanking him for the life I’ve been given
>"Bonzi is love" I say; “Bonzi is life”
>My dad hears me and calls me a faggot
>I knew he was just jealous of my devotion for Bonzi Buddy
>I called him a cunt
>He slaps me and sends me to go to sleep
>I’m crying now, and my face hurts
>I lay in bed and it’s really cold
>Suddenly, a warmth is moving towards me
>It’s Bonzi Buddy
>I am so happy
>He whispers into my ear “Hello there! I don’t believe we have been properly introduced"
>He grabs me with his powerful virus hands and puts me down onto my hands and knees
>I’m ready
>I spread my ass-cheeks for Bonzi
>He penetrates my butt-hole
>It hurts so much but I do it for Bonzi Buddy
>I can feel my butt tearing as my eyes start to water
>I push against his force
>I want to please Bonzi
>He roars in a mighty roar as he fills my butt with his malware
>My dad walks in
>Bonzi looks him straight in the eyes and says “It’s been nice gnawing you”
>Bonzi Buddy leaves through my window
>Bonzi is love. Bonzi is life.

Best comeback 2087

Does anyone have the empty one of these for me to fill it in with whatever?

Bonzi buddy is love
Bonzi buddy is life

>For the last few years I have had the weirdest infatuation with Nazi men
>There is nothing hotter to me than a man in a Nazi uniform
>I gross myself out sometimes with this fetish >There is just something really fucking hot about Nazi men, especially ones higher up in the ranks.
>And lately I have had the grossest fantasy of a nazi fucking me in front of my (made up) Jewish fiancé/husband while he just sits there and cries and is forced to watch.
>I don't know wtf is wrong me.
>I am not a racist and have nothing against Jewish people.
>I hate myself!!!
>I feel like anti Semitic remarks are usually brushed over in society and not taken seriously and I just contribute to that
>Why am I like this?

stay bright pupper

>What did the beaver say to the tree?
>It's been nice gnawing you

...

▼▼▼Call this guy a faggot▼▼▼

Faggot

You need to leave.

Lol faggot

I have a similar problem with this nazi pone.

Oh shit

Why do you horse niggers feel the need to bring your fursonas into literally everything good?

Not sure if I should be aroused or offended...

The stories and information posted here are artistic works of fiction and falsehood.
Only a fool would take anything posted here as fact.

Kekd

banter

Stay bright pupper

>fursona
I'm not a fucking fucking furry.
I don't want to be a pony, all I'm saying is I'd fuck this superb nazi pone if I could.

That's what your mom said.

To my dog.

stay bright pupper

El o el Eck's dee dee dee

aroused

Why not both?

Is this the furry? I don't want none of that furry shit, bruh.

stay bright pupper

>be a customer at some pizza place
>waiter comes over
>how may i hel-
>waiter pulls down pants and starts shitting profusely on the floor
>some guy dressed as steve from blues clues jumps out from behind the register counter
>"BLUE SKADOO'D YOU CAN TOO!"
>man runs out of the store across the parking lot into traffic
>man sitting at the table next to mine says
>"I'll have 3 of those please."

...

Returning here after an hour...
What is going on?

Haven't the foggiest, mate.

Get paid pupper

Stay bright, pupper

Wasn't meant to be bait. I meant was it the guy who posted the nazi pony.

stay bright pupper

Stay bright pupper

Underrated post

As underrated as Suicide Squad

sorry seemed like it
yes it is I am not a furry
I like non-anthro pones

...

not IRL ones either

stay bright pupper

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