What's your last text message from a person of the opposite sex say?

What's your last text message from a person of the opposite sex say?

Bu no, you are married!

Please leave me alone

"dream of fucking my tight little virgin asshole raw"

Omelette du fromage.

I already came did you?

how did you get my number?

hey user theres sausage in the fridge

Error. Does not exist.

"Love you too"

>"Hey son. Hope youre doing well. Havent heard from you in a few months. Dads funeral is tomorrow, we all hope you can make it."

That was 4 months ago. Didnt go.

Then it's my fault and I've proven to you that I'm not to be trusted

"No, I was never interested in you."

"i will"

i think we should just be friends

That makes no sense

>"I'm tired today but do you want to get a coffee in the week?"

What did she mean by this?

no, you make no sense
no, you
no. u

Hiya! We had 33 rows on the Euromillions last Night and won £10.50 so I will buy an extra 5 rows next Friday leaving £1.40 in the kitty. Hope you're having a great weekend Xxx

I'm calling the cops

...

>dont speak to family
>was informed of fathers death
>last text from female was mom asking me to go to funeral, 4 months ago.

You wouldnt say im into that kind of stuff, when you first met me, would you?

>"No"
It's my gf and I asked her if she worked tomorrow

"That's fucking arousing"

(η φάση είναι, αφότου σε άφησα σπίτι και πήγαινα προς το δικό μου, έλεγα στον εαυτό μου "τι παίχτηκε?!?")

From my wife
>> Be home in a minute mrow I had to make a quick pit stop I have the shits

Can you buy me cigarettes when going home from school?

I'm sorry I dropped out of French a bit ago but the girl is really sad because she tried really hard to talk to someone but it went bad? I think... Why is she sad?

Eeh nei?

She's tired and wants to get a fuckin coffee later in the week.

Lol no worries Hun n if u want me to cover ur night shift tonight let me know x

ehm

setting off soon

cheap ass lube

>cheap
>ASS
>lube


get it?
I AM SO FUCKING FUNNY!!

NOW LAUGH BOY!!!

>":p"

I hate you

"Eet je thuis vanavond?"

Not opposite sex, but is a friend telling me to piss on a bottle, cuz drugs things

"Imeline, ma osta. Näeme varsti, kallis