Let's hear your tales

Let's hear your tales

Thanks mr skeltal

The first angel came and soon his brother killed him never to be found.

I Heard tales of a giant like no other when i was just a boy.

It was rumored he capture all the men of a village and stuck them one by one up his ass to achieve climax.

he would stop at nothing he just loved things in his ass. On an ancient Scroll his name OP

inuyasha?

one time a man pooped a sword and it was so big it killed a giant

The men stood in front of this very picture with a smile, their work finally done. The tall one with black hair and a plaid shit stood next to the other man, glaring, and succinct. Lee wasn't the kind of man to do this kind of art, he usually ran down numbers and encoded emotions onto the others around him. Otherwise the tall man with nary a hair on his body that was real usually did that wort of thing. Bowls and bones they both had but one had an extra. the penis was ready and all were silent. a shrieking wail that almost sounded as if wood paper tore and they were sucking dick. Blood flowing and cum ready for the opera show. Lastly but not leastly I went forth.

The dick sucking continued until one popped a menthol cigarette in his facehole and lit up a candle. Now was the time he would ruminate his desire and wring his hands. The paining was done but not the life he needed to live. The short one, Greg, let out the cats and stood back into the doorway. the flames would catch them all singing that lovely tomb when the time came. and now it was coming. With a loaded handgun and finger a plenty he slide them into the soft dark hole.

Twenty cigarettes later the pack was done and nobody worse off than the other. now was the time to sing their opera. Now was the time to let the cats back in. opening the flimsy door and accelerating the blood flow they chanted internally. Hearts and lungs, penises and cigarettes, which would blow first?

thinking for an instance the tall one went down to the cellar and fetched a light. Slowly and surly all the cats caught fire and meowed like a chainsaw running out of gas..... "HERE" he said as he lay down his ass and stroked the kittens. One after another all the residents in the house caught fire and the paining was no more.

>Respect your heritage, Hoen.
>Respect your father, Hoen.
>Raising sheep was fine for your grandfather; you'll learn to accept that great adventures are not for us.

I'm not afraid of what's out there. But I am afraid I'll miss it.

>back down the worn path

thread dissapointing

bmp

"hahaha i told you i couldn't die!" shouted ohpee, the giant faggot skeleton. he started playing with his microscopic penis as he glared at the 2 adventurers in front of him like they were doritos-flavored lolis dripping with baja blast.

"REPLY TO THIS POST OR YOUR MOTHER WILL DIE IN HER SLEEP TONIGHT!" the faggot ohpee screamed as he laughed at his own stupid joke.

the 2 adventurers looked at each other. "this faggot doesn't know he isn't on the internet does he?"
"nope."

and so they left and forgot all about how fucking dumb gay that faggot ohpee was and he finally found a way to kill himself because he was so ashamed of how fucking stupid and faggy he had become.

the end.

Once there was an artist who was terrible at getting proportions right. The end.

"That's a big guy."

>man those birds are fucking huge

As the mountain tribe stumbled through their eighth day in the Godless mountains. Their feet freezing and bellies empty, sickness had taken hold in all but the strongest of souls. Already Halfgar had lost his eldest sons. But he would not lose his tribe. They had to go on, if they didn't the greenskins would take them for sure.

They had heard legends and tales all their lives. About the last God in the world that lived in these mountains. They sought that God put for succor from the warring world. Maybe then they would know peace.

As Halfgar climbed over the ridge, his eyes went wide with terror. A skeleton, hundreds of feet high lay against the mountainside. A gargantuan blade of black iron protruding from its rib cage.

On a plinth in front of him read the words...

"Behold mortal, I am Arius, last of the Gods. Welcomer of tired feet and protector of the innocent folk. Step forth and receive my gift!"

>sahara
>there is a well that stinks like shit
>guy is thinking to himself why a well stinks like shit
>old guy came
>why the hell is well stinking like shit?
>4 centuries ago there was a kingdom which power was beyond imagination! the king was very rich but also weak as a warrior and one day his princes was kidnaped by mighty dragon! king promissed a golden crown for whomever will rescue his princes! brave knight went on an adventure and slayed the dragon! that was a happy day indeed and knight got his golden crown
>yes yes but why this well is stinking like a shit?
>how the fuck should i know?

Niggers and jews did this

"For you"

>be me
>walking sheep to a place I can make the relations with it
>see skeleton
>fuk sheep anyway
MassiveCums.png
>ewe wish you me

But the twist is the giant was regular size and the poeple looking at them were well...insy binsy

Wow this is literally just fucking copied from a writing prompt thread on reddit. Fuck off.

A bitch nigger fucked a fucking nigger and nigger nigger nigger nigger nigger by nigger with his nigger fucking nigger fucked a fucking Jew.

...

>be me
>be in highschool
>be classroom assistant
>but it's really just punishment for my sins
>and this isn't a normal teacher
>no no no
>he's the fucking Tard teacher
>2 weeks ago
>be helping teacher file paper work
>not really work, more like waste
>find one paper
>one paper with English actually written on it
>it reads: wham sham chiggy chiggy
>whattheshit.png
>gave him a 100%
>all the others got 50s
>not that it really effected them
>because they just ended up either drawing on it
>or putting it in there mouth and spitting it out
>on their desks
>which I have to clean
>More?

Hitler in his battle againts Jews, he made a giant sword to kill the final boss, and puting all his power in the sword he died, and every year we come to the mountain to see the glorious work

more plz

more

This happened last Tuesday
>be leaving
>be happy I'm leaving
>Tard wrangler sees me
>"Uh hey user, do you think you can do a favor?"
>"Yeah sure"
>"I need you to go on the special bus"
>"Why?"
>"I have a teacher meeting you just need to watch them"
>I think to myself this is going to be a long ride
>"Yeah sure"
>shakes hand
>when I release my grip there's a 20 in my palm
>I just got payed for watching autists
>get on bus
>the smell of piss and other fluids hit my nostrils
>I look around for a seat
>I see one
>but there's a skinny kid or stick Tard sitting in it
>I sit next to him
>this is where the hell begins
Cont

interested

Op got this off of the front page of reddit

>skinny Tard says hi
>I say hi back
>as soon as our little encounter ends I hear
>RAAAAAAAUG
>wah wat
>apparently there was a kid who left his favorite toy in PE
>it was a McDonalds SpongeBob toy
>Bus driver:"what's wrong?"
>Tard says in Tard accent: SPUU BOW TOYIE
>all tards go into code red
>one of them while flailing is Tard wings hits the emergency exit handle
>Start heading loud alarm
>bus stops tards pile out of the bus
>driver tells me to watch them
>shitonmydick.webm
>be sitting with them
>Tard transporter says he can't find it
>Fucking dammit
>asks me if I have cash
>tell him yes
>he points to the McDonalds across the street
>"Just get a toy"
>I fucking run over there
>cut in front of 2 families just to ask for a toy
>the cunt of a worker told me I have to by a happy meal
Cont

this thread is fucked