Why am I so afraid to open up to people? Even my own parents...

Why am I so afraid to open up to people? Even my own parents? Whenever I want to say something thats coming from my emotions I stop and feel stupid for almost saying it. Im tired of keeping everything to myself.

emotions are for faggots and women. man up life isnt that hard and no one cares about what anyone else feels

...

Stop being a pussy and tell people what's on your mind

I completely feel u man. I'm going through the same thing. Like I can imagine opening up to someone but then it comes to it and I just make some shitty sarcastic remark instead. Like I have no best friend to talk to and when I'm stressed I just go in my room sit at my piano and cry about it because I have no one to talk to. I started dating this girl and it's really stressful because neither of us is really opening up. The best advice I can give is probably just to find someone who you know cares about you, like a parent or a close friend, and tell then that you're serious and that you really need to talk to them and just tell then how you feel and what you're going through. If they care about you they will listen and understand and not think that you're stupid because of it

Damn I see that you guys are just as damaged as I am lmao, so theres no hope for us?

Going to somehow close and telling them that I need to talk seriously and then opening up sounds like the most terryfing thing ever. Thinking about it makes me nauseous. And then what if it wouldn't help at all? Like I get really deep with someone and after I still feel empty. On top of that I would feel the shame burning my insides.

you got more pics of that ass op?

Honestly I feel like life would be so much easier with this attitude. But then agai. If you cant feel emotions then what the fuck is the point of even living?

...

ty. any more? shes hot as fuck.

gay

honestly just do it man it will be worth it after. i opened up to my fam and it was a great choice and feels good. ur family is there for you.

Yeah some 18 yr old slut I met on hot or not from florida.

Honestly I feel like ive been bottling shit up for so long that I wouldn't even know how to open up. It would just be a awkward talk and I would feel even shittier after

OP, the way you are feeling is the curse of your generation. It's not just you. As a matter of fact I'd be willing to bet most of the people at your school have these same problems. It's because of the shitty "best version of yourself" meme that is the Instagram generation. We have become conditioned to filter out everything but what we deem will get us likes and attention but it comes at the cost of our emotional integrity. We hold back everything and become passive aggressive with no working knowledge of healthy relationship or worldly skills like how to make strong friendships or perform basic household chores. One of my roommies is 18 and he had every problem you and I both described. I'm only 25 and not without my own struggles of independence but it just goes to show you how quickly social media is causing us to fall apart as humans (IG wasn't a thing when I was in HS and if it was it was shitty and no one used it)

The only way to undo this problem is to recognize that humans need to connect emotionally and just overcome your fears and go for it. The first time is the hardest but it gets easier with application

you are not crazy, you are someone who was raised not to be a sociopath

most people around us are

its acting, lying and gaming

we are propagandized not to be like that, so privliged people can then get ahead of us being hypocrites with no consequences

the red pill is you need to play the games to survive, or you MGTOW

fuck authenticity, but you have to be smart about it

use it only on those who deserve it

do onto others before they do onto you

I feel you %100. All my friends are brainwashed and only care about showing themselves off. They dont care about having a passion for something or feeling something special, they just wanna get some pussy just to brag about it. I mean pussy is great and all but whats the point of having drunk sex every night when I cant even have a normal convo with a girl when Im sober. All of them just want to "flex" on ig and snapchat. Its honestly disgusting whats happening to the youth. Im only 18 so unfortunately Im right in that generation that youre describing.

So be real with the ones that matter and fake with everyone else? I honestly dont even know how to be fake which is usually why I dont make new friends

What most people don't understand is that it's not hesitation. It's not the same as stopping yourself from saying something stupid in a crowd. They're 2 different things.
It's a mental block. It's like the hormones produced to create emotions stop working and the processes used to translate thoughts into language get blocked.
I literally stop when i try to open up with people, i dont hesitate.
Until recently i had a hard time talking to girls because of it, i still have trouble but i couldnt get a single conversation going.
Every once in a while i just start crying because everything has been bottled up and they all explode at once

Yeah ive bottled it up for so long that I dont think Ill ever be able to open up to another human. Even when I did MDMA with my cousin I had a hard time opening up, while he was telling me all his deepest secrets. I felt like such a dick because I saw how honest he was being with me but I was just too afraid to return that honesty. It feels like Im not human anymore. The lack of emotion makes me feel like Im living in 3rd person all the time.

one way is to consume trash pop culture

but another way in is via briggs Myers typology, reading Carl Jung

also cook ,diet and work out for self confidence

you know what, forget /fit,

just cooking by itself is awesome for a sense of accomplishment/ creating something/ skill to brag about, and diet/good food plays a huge part in your mental health


And on an even more personal note: Learn a foreign language, even just French, it does so so much for you

Also Im curious, do you have a good relationship with your parents?

This may sound cheezy and retarded but give someone a hug. It legit will make you feel better. Being embraced helps calm a person's nerves

I actually eat really healthy and am also really fit. Girls usually compliment me on my body. I started creating music recently and its helped me a lot with feeling like a human again. When I create a track it feels so rewarding but thr process in itself is so beautiful. It almsot feels spiritual. Its like the only thing that keeps me away from drugs

Ive been dreaming of that. I just dont know who. Ive never told my parents that I love them, or ever gave them a spontaneous hug(only when leaving for long). Fuck it though opiates feel almost as good as a hug

My dad is the main reason i let my emotions go. I have a great relationship with him but hes angry beyond reason. Every once in a while he puts to much pressure on me, not in work or anything, he just starts yelling at me for whatever. The last time it happened he gave me some money to count after he was yelling at me to complete some unimportant tasks. It had been over a month and i had a lot of shit gathered.
I counted the money and i got no result. I counted it right, but i didnt know how much there was. After 4-5 times and him yelling i just let it go. The worst part is that he doesnt understand how big of a problem it is for me.
I think it has something to do with a couple of epileptic seizures i had before i turned 1 year, but im not sure

Damn I would probably flip out on my dad for that. We'd curse eachother out and he wouldn't even care. Its like he doesnt care about anything. When I dropped out of highschool(social anxiety) he just laughed and told me to get a job or else he'll kick me out. Did your dad ever tell you he loves you?

I feel you OP.
Las friday i was on my way home by bus. It is a 1h 30 min trip so I think of a lot of things. I got one of those thoughts that I have no one close enough to talk about and I tried not to cry for about 30 minutes, but at the end I had to fake that I was sleeping with my face down and started to cry.
Except for that moment I havent cried in 8 years. I am 10 so I think it is just the hormones, but man Im getting really tired of that excuse.

I am 20 !! not 10

>Your relationship with your father sounds tough.

Kek that was clever. You had my sympathy at first but I wasnt even mad when you made the joke. Shit made me laugh

See a counselor or psychologist

I cant remember him saying the words but i know dor certain he loves me as his child.
Matter of fact the only times i do cry ehen i let go of my emotions is when my dad puts the extra pressure on me.
I just cant handle it, the simplest fucking task becomes hard to do, its like i have 2 left hands and cant complete any processes in my brain. These things happen even when hes not around but they dont last. Ive worked on it and it doesnt hallen as often but im not completely cures. Ive told him about the problem but he cant understand it. Its like your brain goes through fog, nothing is clear. Ive told him this but he cant grasp the concept

Not about what you say but how you say it. Expressing your feelings is cool but know how to read the room.

You need to elaborate more or give me some examples. Are these feelings you can't get out good or bad? Like...are you trying to voice your displeasure or tell some girl how you feel?

Damn thats sounds rough man. Is your mother not present in your life?

It feels like everything I say to anybody is fake. I avoid any serious topics, even when speaking to my parents. I just always say sarcastic shit it something else. Only time when I feel my emotions is when Im by myself.

My mothers present, she just doesnt play a role in this problem.
Up until 2014, it was like my entire brain was in fog, you just dont know whats going on. right now theres less "fog" than there was, but i get back when im talking to a girl or when my das starts yelling

Cause you're a pussy

I used to get that feeling back when I was 14. Turns out I had depersonalization from anxiety. Have you ever looked into that?

Ive never looked into it but it makes a lot of sense, howd you get rid of it

I didnt it just slowly faded away over the years. I dont think it truly ever went away I just stopped thinking about it. I also believe that the depersonalization was caused by the bottling of my emotions.

I uesed to zone out all the time, and sometimes even forget where I am. Sometimes I would do something and then not remember doing it.

I zone out too, i dont realize when i start but its taking me less and less time to realize it. For a while i thought i was autistic. Do you smoke pot?

Well I use too, now it gives me anxiety. The depersonalization was actually triggered by a panic attack I had while I was really high

I havent smoked in a lobg time but i think it helped. I might get back to it every once in a while even though ive made progress after i quit