It's a Dog eat Dog world, and I'm the fucking Chinaman

It's a Dog eat Dog world, and I'm the fucking Chinaman.

Check out my circumcised penis, Ray. I paid the rabbi a visit earlier. I guess you could call me the Jew Detective. L'Chaim you greasy goy cocksucker. Caspere Jew this

I wish Vince posting would come back

I've never lost my cool, Ray. Not even when my fucking fridge was stolen.

>you ever heard the expression "Kill two birds with one stone", Ray? Turns out I got an ostrich in front of me and an emu behind me. I misunderstood the idiom and now I'm stoned as fuck. I'd rather follow their lead and bury my head in the sand. Hit this shit, Ray. Caspere smoked this

You gotta break a couple eggs to make an omelette ray, and im the fucking hen.

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Best meme of 2015

But emus are the opposite of ostriches. They don't stick their head in the sand, they are vicious thugs. Ray being stuck in between a thug bird and a peaceful bird is a nice image though, and it fits with the Bird mask guy.

My grandfather told me you can discover everything you need to know about everything by looking at your hands. I've been looking at mine all my life, every day since I was 5, and you know what I've just realized? They're fucking feet.

Curiosity may have killed the cat, kimosabe. But I murdered that dog.

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>tfw not clever or funny enough to do a good vincepost

You know what they say, thats how the cookie crumbles. And im the fucking dustvac.

You didn't just screw the pooch, Ray. The bitch is pregnant, you're the father, and you're paying alimony to keep that half-human half-dog abomination out of the dog pound.

no wonder the aussies lost that war

Life's like a box of chocolate? Well guess what Ray, I'm a dog. I'll die if I eat chocolate.

Caspere knew this.

The streets are talking Ray. Sayin ive got soft, that i aint down to clown. Well ya know what? Theres roadwork ahead

What's the humor supposed to be? I haven't seen this show, so I have no idea what's going on.

comedy is like a fart, if you try too hard you're gonna shit your pants.

Thanks user

Pizzaman made Vince Vaughn's character always spoke in these idioms for some reason.

No longer. No more big fuckin' shoes Sam. Only justice, intellect. Volumes of the mind. Not perversions of the the feet.

You want a reason Rey? Here's the reason. I'm the lolipop king and you're my wrapper.

casper knew this

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They say an apple a day keeps the doctor away. Well I've been eating grapes and I'm fucking ready to die.

They told me that when you write an angry letter you should put it in a drawer and see if you feel like sending it the next day.

I'll see how I feel tomorrow, but I'm still gonna send that other letter I wrote yesterday like every other fucking one I've written for the last 17 years of my goddamn life.

My father always told me, "it's better to be pissed off than be pissed on." Well you know what Ray? I'm the fucking piss. Casper knew this.

lmao