Lol wtf Tolkien...

Lol wtf Tolkien? I can't believe a guy writing a children's fantasy novel in the 1930's actually decided to include this.

>1930=middle ages
What kind of drugs are you on?

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Peter Jackson butchered The Hobbit but I never liked the book, was basically a apologia for the jews.

Just reading LOTR now. It's amazing that the same director who in some ways managed to make that story better (at least in film form) could fuck up The Hobbit, a fucking children's book by comparison, so badly.

The guy hated allegory and thought it was retarded when writers use it so I don't think that was his intention.

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What does an Elves semen look like? I mean they are like immortal so it is bound to be super magic right?

>Elves semen
Probably has a long pompidour and goes around telling others he's "all shook up", I imagine.

Fucking thinking this shit was in the book

Retard

WB gave him baisically 1 week of pre-production. The movies are a miracle in a way

>That rape scene man
Couldnt believe I was reading Tolkien

REading about a elf chick getting sadomasochisticly getting raped by 4 dwarves, dafuq man

Del Toro was involved for a long time but saw what a mess the production was and pulled out. Jackson didn't.

Trying to pass the blame doesn't work for something like this.

dwarves are the most friendliest beings to ever exist. rape would be the least thing on their minds

Go and actually watch the entire making of on the blu ray box set! I've been doing this and have heaps more respect for Jackson.

That's what you think. They're nice until they see a nice piece of ass. Then something deep down, some raw evolutionary instinct trigger and they become sexually agressive.

They are the ultimate Cosbies, happy and go lucky one moment, next they're gangraping a drunk 23 year old next to a dumpster

Why should I though if I think the movies were terrible?

wew lad

>tfw the first two movies are tolerable but the third is unwatchable
How could the WB fuck up so hard? I'm not sure who is more retarded at this point, the executive leadership at the WB or Sony Pictures, it's a fucking toss up of gross incompetence.

>the first two movies are tolerable

He explained why.

Let me rephrase.

Why would I give a shit how hard of a time a filmmaker had making a movie if the final product makes me think he shouldn't have bothered in the first place?

If you dont treat the third as a hobbit movie and just a standalone movie about a bunch of greedy cunts fighting over money it works better. The problem lies in that its suppose to be a Hobbit movie, everything felt like its was trying to be more epic than Lord of the Rings, but the material just wasnt there so it felt dumb as fuck.

Also the first is by far the worst of them all, the Gollum scene is the ONLY thing in the movie I even remember, these movies shouldve been more like that, focused scenes with characters doing things instead of trying to create more and more action set pieces for CGI to run around in.

Trust me I have, I actually quite like the Hobbit movies yet I do have lots of problems with them.

From what I know it was a lot to do with WB being dicks and the whole rights spread across multiple companies that made him get fed up and leave.


Also, I met Jed Brophy (one of the dwarves and close friends with Peter and Fran) at a con back in November, told me he thought they went too away from the book but understood the struggle they had with production. Also said that Freeman was really disappointed with the final films and how they strayed away from making him the focus like the book

The Gollum scene is fucking fantastic, absolutely agree with you.

Kili is so cute :3

fuck off tumblr

You don't have to give a shit! Nobody cares, life is meaningless, we're all going to die.

>immortal race that stays in sexual prime forever

So what kept Tolkien's elves or any elves that live forever or even hundreds of years from causing a massive overpopulation problem by constantly fucking and only dying in war?

They were cold hearted cunts and barely got along with eachother let alone other people.

Nihilism hit you hard, I see.

>crediting some old white dude for this

i tried reading that shit but it was so boring lol, fights sucked and i didnt laugh once

sparkly at least

Elves in most traditional fantasy stories have lower sex drives than the other races because they live a long time.

>middle ages= 2016 ad
lmfao what the fuck are you actually smoking?

Didn't they change from 2 movies to 3 partway through filming them? Who the hell thought that would turn out well.

Turtles seem so friendly too. That got corrected quick in the new movie.

>create an extra cosy opening scene where gandalf trolls bilbo and the dwarves arrive
>thinking I am about to witness a masterpiece like LOTR
>rest of the movie filled with hollywood cliches
>mfw

Whats if you were a human Chad and she fell in love with you, wouldn't she put out? Macking Into the ol lickaroo.