YOGA HOSERS Official Trailer #2

>"This isn't the real world, this is Canada."

Fucken hell, really? Is Kevin Smith the worst at writing dialogue?

youtube.com/watch?v=cawQWKsqXmA

What the fuck is a yoga hoser

also Kevin Smith is a fat shit that needs a heart attack real soon

Kevin Smith has been shit since Mallrats.

honestly it looks pretty fun for a kids movie.

His a hack, puts his wife and kid in a dumb fucking movie. Claimed he was done with that whole universe keeps returning to it with Clerks. Fucking Tusk

I bet they fuck like all the time

Why is Kevin Smith so obsessed with Canada?

as a canadian I despise him

>smith is still insecure manchild who refuses to wear proper clothes in front of his own grown daughter

He disowns it and calls it his kid's movie. Way to throw your kid under the bus, douche.

A NEENYER NARNY?????

>be a director
>make your underage daughter do lewd scenes

this looks beyond awful

what the fuck

who greenlit this

Are they both his kids or just the ugly one?

fat

kill me

the chick on the right is his daughter the other is Johnny Depps kid

she looks like the poor mans alison haislip

movies are all an elaborate money laundering scheme

I want to impregnate Lily Rose Depp.

>sorry aboot that

LOL GET IT CANADIAN ACCENTS!

Holy fuck it just keeps getting worse and worse

lily rose depp is cute af tho

What can we do stop the Clerks royalty checks to stop him from making more shit?

I'd rather fucking die than watch this.

>Hot

Yep she sure is.

>skellingtons are hot

>Kevin Smith is powerful enough to get something this terrible produced

scary desu

like for real, there is no way he doesn't know that people are going to stare at her ass.

Is it creepy to use your own daughter like that or is it smart?

The passive aggression from Cuntnadians isn't picked up by his radar.

lily-rose a cute

The 8-bit font is really triggering me.
What does this have to do with old, low resolution fonts?

This might end up being Smith's biggest bomb. adults aren't interested (he's plastered "ITS A KIDS MOVIE!" everywhere) and teens don't want to watch annoying overexxagerates canadian memes of themselves. the plot is Youtube short tier and the titles makes no sense.

how much will it make?

nice

Kevin Smith? More like Kevin Shit.
This almost feels like one of those trailers for Grindhouse, but it's just a fucking terrible teen flick instead of some good shit. Red Letter Media could do a half in the bag like The Zookeeper about this movie and they could trick people again.

If you want a real Canadian shock/horror/comedy movie, watch Hobo with a Shotgun. At least it's real Canadians and not a bunch of fucking retards playing Igloo livin' Canadians.

$1500

what did she mean by this?

You can already tell she's gonna be as fat as her dad by looking at those arms and shoulders

whos the qt on the left

what the fuck is this movie even about

>Rutger Hauer
>"real Canadians"

uhhh....

>qt
She looks like a fucking tranny. Crazy manface.

The skeleton is Johnny Depp's daughter. I'm sure she'll fill out when she gets older.

>mfw this fucking crap

I'm starting to believe this more often lately.

Do you have the webm of her crushing all the meatmen with her big ass?

she's so fucking beautiful

Most of the cast is Canadian. How many Canadians are there in this shitty fucking movie?

leaf detected

Wy does he make tga fae al tge time

I wish johnny depp's qt faughter had kein smith's thicc daughter's body

best part of the whole trailer bro.

literally bae omg

the definition of uglycute

Thick in all the right places. HNNNNNNNNNNG

pretty hot desu

>Im not even supposed to be here today

Jesus fuck Smith what happened to you?

Stealing off yourself now

God FUCKING damn I hate the memeification of Canada. All of the accents are wrong. The stereotypes are wrong. The setting is wrong. Canada isn't some wonderland of niceness and free healthcare, it has issues. I love Canada but I can acknowledge that.

Kevin Smith knows jackshit about Canada. He's not even Canadian. He needs to fuck off.

>A neenya narty

what did he mean by this

All it needs is methheads and drunk Indians.

This looks like fun.

When is RocketJump uploading the full movie to YouTube?

This is a RocketJump film right?

Because it looks like cheaply made, poorly written shit. That's the joke .

>"a kids movie"
>was originally rated R

There actually was a couple of Nazi movements in Canada. One was the National Socialist Christian Party in Quebec, the other was the Canadian Union of Fascists led by the teenager Chuck Crate. Of course Smith didn't actually research this.

Smith probably didn't even research Canada before making this

>So a canadian hitler

>nein, nein, NEIN, NEIN! SO MUCH NEIN IT'S ALMOST TEN

this was where i started laughing out of how bad it was
kevin smith has no shame and no sense of how shitty he is at writing

I have some Canadian friends who thought that line was funny.

why boner

This. I don't give a fuck about the quality of this movie. I want to cuddle with that qt.

this

and Smith may have psised off some Jew who now makes him atone by whoring out his own daughter / committing career suicide

just sayin

...

It'd be funny if it was on its own and not said with no irony whatsoever in a movie.

People make such a meme out of Canada that being Canadian is a meme. It's the worst.

...

She was already fat once

i actually laughed at that

He cast her as a camwhore on holidays
Only watch this for waifus desu

She looks like Hagrid

it's a good joke, I like it

This is what a dad should film.

This shit is basically Canadian blackface. Fuck everyone involved in this project.

Yeah nobody has ever had a catchphrase.

Fuck off fagboi ... the fries are about ready to come out of the oil.

oh my god end it make it stop holy fuck jesus why

Exactly. It's even worse when it's being done by Kevin Smith, who doesn't have a semblance of Canadian blood in him.

Kevin Smith if you're reading this, just stop. Seriously, what made you original in the 90s is long dead. You've turned into a giant cliche of who we were in the mid to later 90s and you refuse to give it up and move on with your career. You suck, and I burned my dogma poster 4 years ago because you suck so bad. Fuck you, thank and good night.

someone make a change.org petition to urge kevin smith to stop

This is playing into my giantess fetish nicely. And girls in yoga pants.

Also the film is made for about three million dollars and makes its money back right away by distribution sales. It literally can't bomb because it's already made its money back.

She looks like Amy Buttercheeks Bingaman.

what the fuck is wrong with kevin smith

He has no self awareness whatsoever.

What is he wearing, shorts made for fat tall people or pants for trees

i think he had a whole think planned for the early 2000s to end the view askview universe in a cool way but jason mewes became a junkie and everyone he knew with talent went on to bigger and better things.

I N D I E C I N E M A

the90's.jpg

He doesn't have Mosier working for him anymore.

christ.

not even discount store ASR can save this shit.

>Walt bry and q are too close of friends of Kevin
>they cannot shit on this and tusk like they normally would
Imagine if they recorded an episode like they did for TFA where they just shit all over Kevin's last few movies like we all know they want to

TESD is objectively better than any podcast Kevin does.

He did.

...

it must suck to be depps daughter right now
him and smith literally just got together and said lets make a movie to make our kids famous lel
now he's a hobo who beats his wife before her movie comes out

what am i watching