Yes, yes, well done, Slytherin. Well done, Slytherin

Yes, yes, well done, Slytherin. Well done, Slytherin.

HOWEVER

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>Minus 60000000 points for the wizard holocaust

Just fuck my shit up

Dumb dumb Dumbleposter

>90% of students from Slytherine turn into ark wizards
>not just throwing all new Slytherines into the lake immediately after the sorting hat ceremony

FUCK SLYTHERIN
GRYFFINDOR WINS

>LET THE ANNUAL SLYTHERIN PURGE BEGIN

>'However I believe Mr. Malfoy and Mr. Crabbe were seen trying to pour Zyklon B into the Wizarding Gender Studies lecture room, for that I deduct 90000000 points'

>there are people on this board RIGHT NOW who still believe Slytherin house was evil before Dumbledore's dick move

What was the point of that competition anyway? I don't remember.
What was the prize for the winning house?

The house cup

They change the banners in the dining hall.
And free blowjobs from Luna

>not 6 000 000 000 points

ONE NOB

Dumbledore is an asshole.

Yes, yes, well done, Gryffindor. Well done, Gryffindor.

HOWEVER

This is what happens when you try to inject cartoonish good vs. evil in a semi-serious or serious toned story.

youtu.be/XZ4lCnZ-WyA

How did Slytherin ever get into the position to win the house cup anyway? Gryffindors are always bossing sports, Ravenclaws are super intelligent nerds, Hufflepuff are the good two-shoes getting points for being so good.

How? Slytherin is full of delinquents who probably all bludge class to do meth in their Aryan clubs.

...

Literally the only Slytherin teacher anyway, he'd have to deduct like 500 points per potions class.

'>Correct Ms. Granger, but in Slytherin house we wouldn't let a nigger like yourself yell out in answer, 420 points from every member of Gryffindor in this class

Not to play armchair writer, but if I wrote Harry Potter ideally you would have four leads, one of each house, and they represent the ideals of those houses and clash and come together over the course of however many books. It makes more sense to me at least than the house of the heroes is the good guys and there's a whole house of evil wizards in training. It also devalues the other houses because who cares about them? They aren't important.

I know it's funny to make it sound like Dumbledore was fucking over Slytherin but I realised recently that really he was sort of returning it to how it should have gone. The only reason Gryffindor lost is because of bullshit reasons. Like the trio trying to help Hagrid fix a huge mistake of his, and losing the Quidditch Cup (worth a buttload of points) because Harry was busy dealing with Voldemort.

Gryffindor were the rightful winners.

kek

Yes Yes, Well done twins. Well done twins.

However.
......its not going to wooooork

>ideally you would have four leads, one of each house, and they represent the ideals of those houses and clash and come together over the course of however many books
That actually sounds really cool. Although there is an appeal in how Rowling did it. By the main characters all being in the house it gave the reader that sort of comfy camaraderie with Gryffindor. I think for kids there's something very appealing about imagining themselves chilling by the fire in the common room, having a laugh with their friends. You'd lose that if you spread the narration amongst all the houses like that.

At the last there should have been significant secondary characters from each house. We only really have Malfoy. And I guess Luna, but she was a bit of a late addition.

Yes, Yes. Well done, students. Well done, students.

>However

fuck. literally spat out my drink

I think the camaraderie could be done with a club all the characters belong to, or maybe a common parlor area where the houses fraternize. But I understand what you mean. I think a long time ago I just realized I grew out of enjoying the series, but I think the appeal for kids is still there and maybe it's better as is. I'm not sure it would have been the sensation it was if it made you think and question yourself or really delve into adult stuff kids wouldn't get.

Snape was just countering Dumbledore's bullshit.

Yes, Yes. Well done, Krum. Well done, Krum.

However

Honestly I could understand all the hatred towards Dumbledore and Harry Potter for this bullshit. They're blatantly rigging the game.

>tfw Hermione got fucked by Krum in the Forbidden Forest

Yes, Yes Well done, Harry. Well done, Harry.


However

>Having a house whose "special characteristic" is being evil
Why the fuck would they bother

>I think the camaraderie could be done with a club all the characters belong to
Yeah, that worked pretty well with Dumbledore's Army. But if it was sort of like that from the start of the series it would really blur the lines between the houses to the extent where they're almost pointless. I think the simplicity of the system definitely did the series some favours and made it more likable to younger kids. You can easily sum up the houses. Ravenclaw's the nerds, Griffindor's the cool/brave kids, Slytherin is the naughty kids, and Hufflepuff are the literal who's.

Rowling probably should have put more effort into breaking the boundaries between the houses as the series progressed though. Especially with the War looming, there was so much emphasis on unity, maybe the characters should have actively started rejecting the false division of the houses. Who knows. I still like it and plan on re-reading them soon.

Apparently this was the plan in the first place. Harry was Gryffindor, Hermione was Ravenclaw, Ron was Hufflepuff, and Draco was Slytherin. Sounds like it would've been harder for the trio to interact though.

She had ample room to give Draco a redemption arc, but chose not to because so many fans wanted it, and she didn't want to pander, I guess.

Well cedric was a bro and luna and later draco doesn't rat harry out

Plus I think ron and hermione exhibited gryfinndor traits. They broke the rules and did so to help out and help the school out

it was just a prank

>not just throwing all new Slytherines into the lake immediately after the sorting hat ceremony
Would never get away with it. 1/4 of students being Slytherins likely means 1/4 of the British Isles' wizard population are Slytherin graduates who would say things like "Well I don't support what Voldemort did, but SOMEONE had to do something about all those damned mudbloods" And those of them like Lucius Malfoy took an active role in pressing for school policy, and was able to do it sometimes.

Yes, Yes. Well done, Harry. Well done, Harry.

However.

Water

dumbleposting is quickly becoming a favorite meme of mine

Their 'special characteristic' is that the trait they value most is ambition, or something like that. It just happens that the majority of people who seek power are assholes.

I meant on a bigger scale. The houses are always pitted against each other with the point system and the quidditch matches, and they hang out in rooms that nobody from the other houses is even allowed to enter. It could have been interesting if in the later books the kids were like, fuck this, we're going to be fighting side-by-side in a war soon. And started finding new places to hang out together or protesting the point system or something. I dunno. I literally only just thought of it, so it might be a shit idea. Especially since most kids were flat-out denying the impending war.

it was to show that in the real world, even assholes are needed.

Nah she didn't. Didnt get fucked til the next year

Well yeah, I think the way the sorting worked is it considered what ideals you value most, not necessarily what ones you possess. Hence why bumbling Neville only really displayed griffindor traits when he grew up.

>Every day until you like it!

sage goes into all fields

this is a good one, thanks!

The sorting hat's a drunk anyway, rarely do the characteristics of the person actually match the house

James Potter was a fucking asshole, he totally should have been either in Slytherin for his lack of empathy or Ravenclaw for being a smartass. There was nothing courageous or moral about him, he was just kind of a douche

>Americans can't into obscure public school systems of reward and oppression where the real reward is a life of competitiveness on an almost sociopathic level

Fuck got me good there.

The meme took off

That's because it's about what ideals you value, more than what ones you have. James was a super asshole though. Why did Harry even name his kid after him. Most the people Harry named his kid after were assholes, actually.

Yes, yes, well done, Slytherin. Well done, Slytherin.

HOWEVER since Voldermort's daughter tried to travel back in time to kill Harry Potter while his son and his dumbass friend did other bullshit time travel things, I must take about 69,420 points.

"You motherfuckers!"

Fuck
Forgot pic

Don't ever cast spells at me or my crush's husbands son ever again

Yea it could have beem but by that time the school was in full lockdown almost and the ministry was corrupt as fuck and brazilian and shit Harry banded whoever he could in dumbledores army. In the sixth everyone is so batshit scared they just go about their normal business and party and fuck like its dumbledores last year. In 7 they fight

>"WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING YOU MOTHERFUKERS!"
What did he mean by this?

Is there another character as cucked as Snape?

I would seriously pay to see a parody based on my immortal

Ignore it

Looking back I think that was one of my favorite elements of the books

having never met them, Harry idolized his parents and put them on a pedestal. To an extent, Lily lived up to that standard. But as Harry got older, the penseive revealed that his father wasn't so great after all, and forced him to come to terms with the fact that his father probably wasn't actually all that great, wasn't the hero he thought he was.

Save that Harry doesn't seem to take that whole lesson to heart. Like you said he still names his kid after him, and in the books there isn't an explicit moment where Harry notes on his dad sucking, its just an unpleasant reality he has to deal with.

>ywn be named Draco and boss around two goons to do your dirty work

>rich
>bullied a nerd
>banged the school hottie
Sounds like a cool guy to me

>tfw when the Harry Potter films were super comfy and cheerful for the first two movies
>got washed out and grimdark when they switched director

why did they do it bros

just noticed the other day that Crabbe and Goyle are MIA for the entirety of Half Blood Prince movie, despite half of it centering around Draco having a mental breakdown.

You think that'd be the one movie where they'd be relevant, but for whatever reason the actors were banished from the set

>You're a bunch of white males; so you are disqualified.

#NotAllSlytherins
Slytherin is a house of peace

You're a pleb l. I can appreciate both. The first two books are literally kiddie shit. Sirius dying hogwarts being orwellian harry getting mindfucked. Dumbledore dying literaly deathly hallows and soul splitting kind if kends itself to be adapted as such. Witchcraft you know can be dark. You have bad taste cuarons and yates and pure kino

They weren't banished they were literally getting arrested and shit.

use some commas, dumb kinoposter

iirc the fat dude got arrested after being pulled over by the cops and they found a shit ton of drugs in the back of his car.

They didn't get how to transition from the Prisoner of Azkaban tone, which was quite fitting for the story, to the Goblet of Fire tone, which was horribly forced in the movie, and sucked all the fun out of the story.

>Would never get away with it.
They have school records right? Kill every Slytherin who graduated, and then add an axe blade to the Sorting Hat so that if it says Slytherin you get the chop immediately.

I do, I just didn't there

I think that was good too. Rowling could have easily played it safe but she had these moments where she added these awful characteristics to the "good guys". I think Dumbledore's an even better example of it. For 6 books he's seen as this noble figure, strong and powerful and extremely moral. And then after he's dead his name is dragged through the mud when it's revealed that he used to be a mega asshole, neglected his family that needed him, and inadvertently caused the death of his sister. Not to mention he uses Harry like a pawn in a game.

The fact that Harry still names his kids after these assholes does feel realistic, because despite their glaring flaws he still sees them as heroes in his head. But I think most readers don't see anything wrong with that, and they think that those characters genuinely deserve the respect. Actually, I don't think Rowling even sees anything questionable about it.

Snape too. Snape's twist was a good one but he was still an asshole. He still mercilessly bullied a young child for purely selfish reasons. Sometimes I think it might have been better if part of the twist was that Snape had to be a dick to Harry in order to maintain his cover. Because if anybody heard that he was nice to Harry it would definitely put his loyalties to the Dark Lord in question. In a way, that feels like it could be more tragic. That for years he had to hate this child who was his only connection to the woman he loved. But that might have been too easy.

i swear this room gets smaller in each movie

Goblet of fire was directed terribly that's why. Its the worst one, yates are so much better

Well that's certainly true.

Lol try watching the movies. Its pretty big in 5 and 6. I think they had to use real castle locations for 6.

>because they closed the Calais refugee camp

Yea its like an action flick. They missed the tone of the tournament it was supposed to be like wizard olympics not a deathmatch

Okay, so I don't know much about Harry Potter but why the fuck does Hogwarts have a school entirely for evil wizards. That seems like a pretty stupid idea. A guy like Draco or his dad who everyone agrees are assholes and who nobody's surprised when they join forces with the magical Antichrist to wage war on the school probably shouldn't get into the school in the first place, right? Maybe I'm just missing something massive here but it doesn't seem to add up.

>And free blowjobs from Luna
You didn't need to win to get that ;^)

Goblet of Fire is when the series went to shit in general. Rowling basically admitted that she fucking hated writing that book and almost didn't even finish it because it was such a mess

You're missing probably everything its british and quite tongue and cheek. Students are seperated in british private schools.

Is there a designated evil group?

it's based on a childrens book

Also in Ireland and Great Britain up to very recently, many schools assorted students into classes based on intelligence. Certainly during the time Rowling went to school anyway, so it may be based on that

Source? This sounds interesting. I love reading about writers being completely candid/brutal about their own work.

except the entire point of the challenges is to see who the most badass or noble wizard or whatever is

and harry was more badass and noble without following the rules


people that follow the letter of the rules at the expense of the spirit are dumb

The adaptations by yates to me were the best you could do with the books in translating them to film. His are very emotional so they center on harry as they should. The directing and cinematograohy was all top notch and I feel his took the material and got across everything important plus was shot superiorly. The acting improved and the series to me was very satisfying

There are some JK Rowling mini documentaries on youtube, where she talks about her experience with the books. I honestly don't remember in which ones she talks about, but she made comments on multiple occasions about going through hell with GoF. She said she had writers block for the entire thing and wanted to start from scratch, but her publishers insisted she release the work she had done

Why are the heads of each house able to give and take away points? Like Snape could just give Slytherin ten thousand points and they'd win

How come pottershit falls apart so easily when scrutinized?

I thought the book was pretty good desu so that's interesting

WHATS THE WORST THAT I COULD SAY

It doesn't. Case in point you underrating brave new world. The fuck outta here

>muh soma
Fuck off.