He's the mac daddy of fantasy

So how come no one's made a formidable series about Conan yet?

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what about arnold's? what do you mean by formidable?

I mean like LOTR or Harry Potter, they've got 6-8 movies while Conan has 3, and one was practically a B movie so what gives?

After Game of Thrones ending, HBO will want replacement.

they tried to reboot it a couple years ago with Khal Drogo.
Didnt go great. It looked like a Scorpion King sequel.

They will try to make it into schlock. Howard had literary pretensions despite the avenue in which his stories were published.

>those thighs
>dem legs
>dat ass

T H I C C
H
I
C
C

it was pretty fucking terrible.

Frank Cho is a godsend

they did, it failed

Because the series would be Spartacus/Strike Back/Banshee in ancient fantasy land. Following Conan and friends going on adventures, slaughtering fools, eviscerating monsters, fucking wenches. With a license as big and beloved as Robert E. Howards Conan series would cause a massive uproar in the media, especially the moralists. I'd love to see it done right with a big budget on a pay tv network but i don't think it's going to happen in a way that the source material deserves.

Fucking Jay Leno

Are this bait? The answer is an obvious jimmy-rustler but these threads never go anywhere.

If so I'll bite anyway: our PC culture wouldn't stand for it. If you know anything about conan, hell, if you've even just glanced at some of Frank Fazetta's conan-inspired paintings (pic related), you know why.

If we DID get a new conan movie it would revolve around a progressive stronk womyn out-conaning conan. Mind you, not a chick who could hold her own through sorcery, seduction, or roguish cunning (totally plausible/common in the Conan universe). Just a straight up hack-and-slash stronk womyn played by some skinnyfat actress who could kill Conan in outright combat with one hand tied behind her back, despite clocking in at oh ~130 lbs. It would be about her teaching Conan to come to terms with his feminine side and getting in touch with his emotions.

It would be a fucking abomination.

Yeah that was the B movie. Did that one even use one of the short stories' plots?

No Conan movie has adapted a REH story.

Adapt to this.

I always wondered is this series actually worth reading? I always liked the idea of fantasy but LOTR was just boring preachy crap to me. Are these books as sexy and exciting as the artwork makes them out to be?

This is basically all you need to know about Conan, books or comics.

Is there any reason why? It's stuff like chopping up lions and dragons, and meeting elephant heads and harpies.

What's so hard?

They are alright, but I prefer the comics adaptations. Also, Solomon Kane is better; I like the idea of this deranged Puritan thinking he is carrying out God's will by killing heathens and evildoers.

That pic looks PROBLEMATIC for these times user..

No clue. Apparently a movie based on the novel-length Hour of the Dragon is in development. This is the one that is supposed to have Schwarzenegger reprising his role, this time as old King Conan. Mite b fun.

don't red sonja do it already?

>Apparently a movie based on the novel-length Hour of the Dragon is in development.

Please, don't get me hype, user.
Hour is easily the best Conan adventure

In the current SJW world we live in? It's ever going to happen. Unless they make Conan a woman or some shit.

>how come no one's made a formidable series about Conan yet?
its a series about a barbarian reaver who does around and kills black sorcerers who kidnaps white women written by a Sup Forumsock in 1920s texas. I'm still blown away they made an adaptation of it that faithful in the 80s.

My favourite part of this image is the giant inexplicable skull in the background

Conan v. Japanese tentacle rape

>It looked like a Scorpion King sequel
say what you will about the film but the visual aspect was its strongest

it legitimately looked painterly at times

it's unfortunate that Marcus Nispel has never been given a good script, because he's capable of making a movie look very, very good on a low budget

also see: PATHFINDER

Damn dude, do you even need a visual representation of a Conan story after reading the Howard stories. The way he describes the action is so visceral yet economical in prose that the image generated in The Mind's Eye can't compare. Arnold movies came close but that was mostly because of the music score, he wasn't as agile and 'panther-like' as story Conan.

I liked it. It was a comfy bored afternoon flick. Not going to watch it again, but it was decent, in a B-movie kind of way.

I liked Rose McGowan as the necromancer chick. I guess that was before she discovered feminism.

CONAN
ahhhhh
THE ADVENTURER

CONAN
ahhhhh
MAN OF BRAVERY
HE'S MORE POWERFUL THAN ANY MAN
HIS LEGEND SPREADS ACROSS THE LAND
AND SEA

Having seen the movies as a kid, I was psyched about that series when it came out a few years later.

I liked the Solomon Kane movie

>Rose McGowan
So that's who she was. I remember when I watched this movie she turned me on a lot.

Truly a qt

Not inexplicable
Its supposed be that in Conan's world, Death is a constant sight and for Conan especially, it is the way he lives

>Conan reflects Howard's preferences and prejudices; non-Hyborian (white) people are usually untrustworthy, foolish or villains.
Yeah, no way.

Totally agree user nice job
Are you a critic by any chance?

Dubs of truth. Howard can make perfect imagery without spending a whole lot of words. I love for dumb people like me who can't read all that fast.

Even with that fivehead.

That's what make her attractive imo. I don't know why, it just does.

She's my 90sfu.

Then she had a car accident, needed facial reconstructive surgery and went batshit insane.

post the pic of her and marlyin manson from some red carpent event

you know the one

>those scabbards
>====D

Quick! Must post favorite Conan story or forever be held beneath the dungeon of Tsotha-lanti.

What is the matter with you?

>always depicted as some kind of other-brown barbarian

his only truly successful anything is movies starring an austrian american.

no clue, but I remember reading a conan story where some old flame reappeared and she was pissed he had left her behind but it was complicated, in any case she gives him blue balls and tells him he's going to die, fapped pretty hard

Gotta be frost giants daughter
That opening fight and Conan almost boning a godess. Simply epic and short.

...

Pretty good. Shame fatso died by the spider but oh well.

>ywn raid a village and carry off their thiccest qt
;_;

>ywn travel the seas with your girl and black warriors raiding merchant ships

JDIMSA

Howard was the master of the paragraph.
Also a momma's boy, insane, and a racist.

...

>wanting anything to do with blacks

I guess the reach of the SJW is far indeed if that's accurate to Howard.

This. Howard wasn't a hack, he just really really liked genre fiction.

>you
>having a girl
>when there are black stags around

>I mean like LOTR or Harry Potter
That's lowest common denominator shit made for children. If you want Conan to be watered down as hell and made for a family audience then you can just fuck off right now.

Yes for sure. If you can get your hands on the b&w The Savage Sword of Conan comics from the 80's then read them too.

You clearly never read that story. Girls worship white barbarian cock, nigger dicks can't compete.

Confirmed. Conan cucked a ship full of niggers. Conan confirmed for being alpha chad pro.

Because it would trigger 99% of the audience, and there's literally not way to adapt Howard's stories to include concepts like gender or racial equality.

How would it even work as a movie? Do you make it a TV show? But then how will you get money for the different areas he travels to. Then how will you get the money for the different beasts. I mean look at GOT; highest paid show and they still only have few monsters and battles. I think it would be a financial nightmare to do Conan justice.

Right to Conan are owned by a fucking swedish video game company and they are to progressive to tell a conan story the way it is supposed to be done.

most of the high budget stuff like monsters and magic spells only happen in the climactic scenes. the vast majority of the average conan story is spent dealing with mundane stuff. the real money sink would be the exotic locations, but they could get cheap with that by having him be more geographically restricted

i thought Conan was public domain

Not anymore

deadline.com/2015/05/conan-the-barbarian-robert-e-howard-kull-fredrik-malmberg-paradox-1201433547/

Yea thats true, monsters and magic are not 'till the end. Locations are a problem and restricting them would be a total loss. Not to mention the costumes and armor. I suppose if they avoid highly-recognized actors, unlike GOT, they could use that money for the locations.

Dope. I think Arnie would be perfect for old Conan.