First day јoining a kickboхing class

>first day јoining a kickboхing class
>instructor says this will be your partner today
>turn around
>see this
>she says "put em up mister, im gonna wreck you!"
>wat do?

run

i reck her pussy with muh dik

You've already wrecked my heart, m'lady.

This and tell her she needs extra special protein drinks

and always call me mister

with some sort of eye protection and a cup on, there's literally nothing she could do to me(or any grown man) so i'd just tell her to knock herself out until she gets tired. It's how you deal with children(and women) that get like that.

Two steps back then an RKO outta nowhere

...

wearing a cheap Trilby copy you call a Fedora at Kickboxing class?

Bah Gawd!

UNLEASH

THE

DRAGON

and then just punch right between her ayylmao child eyes

Let her win every time to boost up her confidence and let her feel like a tough girl

>Paul Levesque enters the ring
>Bow down to the king starts playing

I'm sure I could just like lean over onto her and get a pin. Weight classes exist for a reason and I'm not sure she quite looks like she'd be able to push twice her bodyweight off her. Might be pretty fun to grapevine her and feel the struggles for a little bit until she realizes she's helpless and starts pleading with me to let her up.

>Phil Brooks enters the ring
>Look in my eyes what do you see starts playing

Scream like I'm becoming a Super Saiyan and then drop kick her across the room.

>twice her bodyweight

You wish fatass

would licking be considered an Illegal move

Even without a cup I doubt she could hit your balls hard enough to do any real damage

When we were kids, my little sister was constantly hitting me in the balls. I can't have children now.

Tell the instructor that I want a partner that isn't a little girl.

How much of a fag am I in this scenario that the instructor pairs me up with a little girl?

2 weeks ago a friend was teaching his 6 or 8 year old to punch

Now has black and blue balls and she broke his hernia

>Even without a cup I doubt she could hit your balls hard enough to do any real damage

ya you may be right but i'm not taking that chance. I've taken some pretty low impact nut shots that didn't feel too great

You're a YUUUGE fag!

Relativistic Kill Object?

First of all I mumble something nervously which is incomprehensible both to her and to me. She looks at me with a creeped out expression and I begin to sweat and shake. She walks away and I see her whispering to her friend, looking at me and the both of them giggling. I hurry to the changing room and speedily change out of my kickboxing gear and in a fit of angst throw all of it in a nearby bin as I leave (the whole things cost me upwards of 60$, but that makes it all the more cathartic). When I arrive at home I lock the door to my bedroom ignoring the calls from my mother and lay down in my bed and cry with an overbearing sense of impotence. Later on I visit c-chan and repost this thread, for the 100th time this week.

Keks

I used to use one of those to charge and knock over out of control patients

why couldn't it have been judo instead?

Emo fighter? Not a chance

Watch that last Ronda Rousy fight and see how Judo does against kick boxing

Do you need a screen for that projection?

?

...

Drillshine into up smash.

HE'S BROWKEN IN HALVE!

i agree that kickboxing is probably the better martial art for any given fight, but it's stupid to base that on one fight. There is such a huge difference in talent/size/strength.

Brock lesnar could probably wreck my shit with that meme brazilian dance fighting just from size and strength, even though it would be hilarious watching someone that big hop around.

Fuck now i want to see that, just not with me getting my ass kicked

Fuck her mouth and tongue punch her fartbox obv

Do you get to practice throws in kick boxing?

>KAIOKEN X 20

nice

are you me?

I wrestle her to the ground and pretend to struggle so that I can grab weird positions.

Amidst of this I grab her ass like I'm struggling then "accidentally" rip up her shorts and take them off. None of us stops fighting so she is just wrestling in her pants so I pretend to struggle again and slide her pants off to the side so that she is fully exposed.

Neither of us give up and since I'm wearing shorts I pretend to be sliding on the ground to the point where my shorts go beneath my crotch and my pants are revealed. I then slide upwards again so that my crotch is exposed. We are still wrestling (of course) and I turn around so that she is sitting on my chest trying to wrestle my arms down. I push my arms towards the floor whilst she is trying to restle them above my head, I push them down towards my lower body so that she gets pushed up in the air. I push them towards my lower body and she is situated right ontop of my crotch, she then lowers down hard and I enter her.

I then twist her around so that she is laying back to my stomach and I give her a chokehold, which she is trying to escape from by moving her entire body which is stimulating my member whilst inside of her, I lock down her feet with my feet by twisting them around hers and stretching out, so that she is only capable of moving her butt which she frantically is using to get away but doesnt work. I then orgasm inside of her whilst having her in a chokehold. I make sure everyone else in class gets a good look of this before I choke the little girl out and tell everyone she didn't tap.

Everyone then goes mad telling me wtf and I go "you saw it all, it was an accident".

i'd let her win 2bh

wew lad where do I sign up for this?

Give me a Hallelujah!

I bet she thinks she kicked his ass too and feels "empowered."
God women are garbage.

I have a friend that competes on kickboxing national events and have gotten silver several times (atlthough never gold medal).

He is 70kg, I am 100kg at 6'4 after having lifted weights for 6+ years, I've done some amateur boxing-training with friends as well, but never stepped in the ring.

Whenever we playfight I just wrestle him to the ground and pin him/hold him in a chokehold and just physically restrain his arms and legs so he cant do shit.

You have to be retarded to let someone in such a completely different weightclass get the advantage of you.