Literally somebody broke in to my house right now

Literally somebody broke in to my house right now
Guys help me

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en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miodowe_lata
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Im going to die

get naked and lubed up

Just ask if they want something to drink, off to suck their dick and I'm sure it'll be fine

stop being a pussy

Timestamp

find a wepon op

Polish sitcom: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Miodowe_lata
It's Tadeusz Norek

Op is faggot

act like a tour guide. show them around your house, point out expensive items, offer refreshments

Mayb i will just give them my money and they will leave

>tip your fedora
>turn 360°
>walk away

YOU HAVE INTERNET ACCESS, PROBABLY THROUGH YOUR PHONE, CALL THE POLICE, WHAT THE FUCK

I know i will go out of window in my room close the door from outside and call Police

surely turning 360 degrees would mean you walk towards them?

Your new is showing

Faggot

get naked and scream random things in German, their confusion will allow you to escape

Ask them if they'd like some tap water

Grab the biggest knife you have in your kitchen

kill yourself before they kill you

cock slap them
if you die you went out on a high note