Highschool stories thread?

Highschool stories thread?
> Be me, Sophomore, 15, 2012
>have slight Aspergers, can function, have normal friends, we play MW3 together on weekends.
> We were all pretty normal, they disn't know I was an aspie, knew I had ADD, and slight social awkwardness
> Most of us have ADD or OCD, but nothing too severe that we were branded as potatochildren
> Except C
> C was... different
> We didn't really know what he had
> Autism, some form of Down Syndrome, parents visited Chernobyl, crack baby, something like that
> Had a face that had buckteeth, bug eyes, a tiny nose, no real cheeks, and a head that was shaped like an upside down tear drop
> He was fucking annoying
> one party, we invited him over just to piss him off in Halo Reach and MW3
> He's actually, acting kinda normal
> We become friends with him, and invite him to all of our stuff, since he's a jack of all trades in FPS.
> One day, in History, he comes and sits by me
>"user, would you like to study with me and E"
> Had Crush on E
>"Uhh okay C"
Cont?

Sure bump

fuckoff

> We ask teacher if we can leave
> He gives me this look of are you sure
> He knows that I don't want to stand out
> Dumb Aspergers tells me he is relaxed about it and chill over it.
>E also had something, but nothing as bad as C
>We go out of the class and towrds the library
>Classistoorowdyanyway.png
> turn hard left towards bending machines
>Ah we're gonna get some Dr Pepper
> Keep walking past the machines, I had my 1.50$ ready
> We walk to a nondescript black door.
> C opens it
> nofuckingway.jpg
>It was the tardroom.

>We step into the daycare room, it reeks of drool, talc, and shit.
> Laughing nonverbal tard in the corner with a diaper on, and its eyes were facing different directions.
>Go sit down
> in total horror.
>wrangler comes up
> in that babyish, almost condescending voice
>"Hiiiii Who are you!??"
> "user Anonnin, nice to meet you"
> She seems surprised that I formed a coherent sentence in a standard Canadian accent.
>She sits me down by a downy
> Downy begins singing as my face is apple red
>HEYYUY UYYUH! PURDER EN TEH YOOEZAYY
>Get annoyed
> Put in headphones
> Teacher shows me piece of paper with pictures of stock art saying to take off earbuds and plugs
>fuck.

Is anyone here?

I am watching your every movement, user. Continue.

Keep going pls

Yes sir. Now I don't want to rush your story but you better have gotten laid or something spectacular should have happened to you.

I'm here user continue

Continue OP

we wait

Alright.
> Sit there in sheer embarrassment
> Tard singing
> People looking through the window
> ImgonnamakeColumbineajoke.wav
> Tard shits and laughs uncontrollably
> Another tard looks at what I'm doing, drools on my paper, then my sleeve.
> had enough
> head towards the door
> Wrangler 2 says "nuh uh uh" we stay inside, iiiinsiiiiide.
> Speak in German calling her a bitch.
> Doesn't speak German
> Sit back down, wait exactly 5 minutes
> Ask to go to the bathroom
> Wrangler allows, follows me in.
> "Miss Wrangler, this is a mens, I got this"
> she asserts that she's gonna watch me piss
> sprint to class with my work right there.
> Get in, lose her, never speak to E again and shut out C for the rest of highschool.
>mfw I wasted my time in a potatofarm.

KEK. SCREENCAP THIS.

Your story telling skills are fucking shite, OP

Improve, and for fuck sakes quit using fucking letters, just use a name or fake it, jesus christ.

>Cont?

Why the fuck do you even start if you're going to ask? Either post it all or don't fucking bother.

We have a Aussi/eBrit pulling apart a detail!

Oi, Sdeve Erwen Ere! Sum oweld bij jus threw me inna ocean, and I god sdung by a few manda rais, like the provezy zaid, I rowez uhp owen da thurd rai!

that's it? you had a crush on a retard so you partnered with another retard and studied in the padded room for one period?

I wrote this as I was posting, I didn't wanna write 4 pages of greentext then for it to be useless and to waste my time

IKR. HOLY KEK. SCREENCAP THIS THREAD.

Well there's more, but I'm tired so I wrapped it up early because I can't write when I am tired and I need to sleep.

Wtf is this lame ass story? Are you admitting that your so retarded that you actually got away with being in a Learning Disability class? Or is there more? Because not only did you waste your time, you wasted ours.

This is me
Do more because im going to give you the benefit of the doubt and hope that a 19 year old has a better recollection of memories to share that is worth it. Honestly, you might be retarded.

>useless and waste of my time
>Sup Forums
choose one

Also
> Not realizing I turned my real story into a shitpost that is like the prequels in the sense it could of been better.
> posters get buttblasted
kek
But I may post a full story tomorrow that isn't rushed and has the full story but for now bitch for my amusement.

You are obviously a tard

The only buttblasted person here is you cause your story is fucking retarded and was pointless except proving the fact that you were in a LD class and you might actually be retarded.

Kek

You're a fucking faggot, and your storytelling is shit. I kept waiting for it to get funny, and guess what? It never got funny. Mickey Mouse and a Power Ranger spitroasting Miss Piggy would be more funny than that shitstain.

> ur retartedd
>147 IQ
I'm just shitposting because it's 1AM and I need to sleep, I'm not a NEET that stays up till 6 on a weekday. I need to go to uni and work tomorrow.

>147 IQ
You're missing a decimal between the 1 and the 4 you window licking nigger.

>be friendless sophmore
>literally sit alone in the lunchroom tier
>suddenly one day 5/10 girl starts talking to me
>we start going out to lunch everyday
>"holy shit wtf is happening. I actually made a friend and it's a girl I might get laid"
>one weekend she invites me to hang out at the mall
>says it'll be her, her girl friend and me
>it turns out that she also invited another male friend
>she starts acting completely weird bitchy, ignoring me. and giving all her attention to the other guy
>im too autistic to figure out whats going on
>next monday in class, without asking her, she apologizes. starts acting nice again
>invites me over to her house, says shes having a get together with some friends
>i get there
>no ones' there
>we go down to her basement
>the other guy's there
>we start playing vidya
>she's flirting with both of us now
>suddenly she gets on her knees and starts blowing the other guy
>she asks me if i want my dick sucked after she's done with him
>not wanting to lose the only friend i have, i say yes
>she makes eye contact with me and smiles continually while blowing the guy
>they finish
>she gets a call from her "parents"
>i have to leave
>i never got a blowjob

I got fucking cucked.

We're at orange!

...

That's a nice image user, how long did it take you typing "sore ass" into Google to find it? I hope someone shoots up your school while you're eating your lunch alone at the assburgers table.

>horticulture class
>planted pot seeds
>2 weeks pass
>plant shows potential in growing
>2 months pass
>plant shows signs of sativa
>excited
>3rd month
>obvious pot plant
>teacher pours weed killer in it
>go figure
>have class intervention about it

Code red!

Not even mad, bro, try again. You keep replying to me, though. Do you want my cock or something, queerbait?

...

samefaging
OP kys. At least your retard friend could talk to girls, you subhuman waste matter

mfw op had a crush on a fucking downie

high school stories thread? i got a few. Back in hs i joined model un as a freshman. I soon realized that it was the best decision i couldve made, mainly because no one cared about winning during the actual conference. here are a few stories.

>>freshman year, be kazakhstan delegate
>>realized no one cares after the moderater allows the mexican delegate to rename mexico "amigoland"
>>Ukrainian delegate is a tryhard douche
>>socially oblivious
>>prolly the type of dude who cries after getting an a minus
>>anyway hes putting out resolutions left and right so he can try and get an award
>>boratcannotletthishappen.jpeg
>>usa, huezil, austraila, kazakstan, and amigoland spearhead efforts to block every resolution the tard puts out.
>>we're in UNEP which is the united nations environmental program
>>one of the problems we have to solve is world trash problem.
>>usa delegate, who is a typical fratbro privately suggests to me and australia that we dump all the worlds trash on ukraine
>>problemsolved.jpeg
>>australia immediately suggests to the other countries that one country should "heroically bear the burden no one wants to bear" and host the worlds trash
>>outta nowhere norwegian delegate swivels his chair around then remarks without missing a beat
>>"well this country should be centrally located in the middle of a large landmass, have a rather mild to temperate climate, and no ecological or cultural diversity to speak of."
>>he glances at me usa and australia with a smug ass smile
>>i dont know how that fucker knew what we were planning but pic related was troll coalitions reactions
>>ukraine then fucking volunteers to bear this "ultimate responsibility"
>>ukraine trash tier country confirmed
>>nothing could contain our mirth

moar?

If you can't hear the autism in this post then you are truly fucked

Yes

At least you saw a dude get blown in highschool. I never even got that far.

So.'s your asking, no. No moat. Go to sleep.

Moar

ask and you shall receive

>>sophomore year im moving up in the world
>>still in UNEP but now im the russian delegate
>>i also inherited club presidency then explained to my friends how much of a joke this was
>>a few things of note happened this year

part 1/3
>>at the beginning of every day of the conference countries check in
>>roll call goes to huezilian delagate
>>stand up and says
>>i am actually the Pandoran delagate, human colonization has hurt our ecological biodiversity and our native peoples, as an emissary of eywa, i ask for you to denounce blue man group as cultural appropriation for blueface
>>avatar had just come out
>>whole committee like lolwut
>>grad student moderator sighs like he doesn't get paid enough for this
>>then lets it happen
>>blue man group was subsequently outlawed

OP, I think you may be actually retarded.

part 2/3

>>turns 10 bong
>>english delegate makes bullshit point of privilege
>>moderator sighs
>>idgaf.jpeg
>>he makes a motion for "tea time"
>>actualy indian-american indian delegate gets up
>>pulls a silver platter, crumpets and a kettle out of his backpack
>>serves the british delegate with grace
>>mfw

part 3/3 for sophmore year
>>nothing big
>>throughout conference me and cubabro were sending notes with cheezy pickup lines to the georgian delegates
>>"moderate your caucus" yadda yadda
>>we get back digits and a note saying
>>russia feel free to invade us anytime -the whorgians
>>icantbelievethatworked.gif

this is model un op
yall want moar?

a dude tried to blow me in high school because i fucked his sister. Ill "spook"text if you're interested.

Yes

Oh

just for you bud im staying up

>>junior year i get moved to the security council
>>but im shit tier pakistan delegate
>>devote the entire conference to doing the opposite of what the indian delegate wants
>>rwanda is the new ukraine
>>tryhardddd bitch
>>we block all of his proposals
>>he bitches about it
>>best korean delegate tired of his shit
>>whispers something to the moderator
>>fatass moderator takes out a d20 and tells him to roll it twice
, then natural 20
>>moderator then cracks up and proceeds to tell us that a crisis has occurred
>>rwanda has been nuked into oblivion
>>russia then remarks that since there are no rwandans left on earth rwanda has no power
>>he becomes a ceremonial figurehead with no speaking power
>>he straight up cries
>>we do nothing to reprehend north korea
>>then proceed to make chick fil a a world heritage site
>>it was a good day

Thank you

np ill post senior year in a hot sec

>>>then proceed to make chick fil a a world heritage site

glorious

Not him but thanks, im also enjoying this and im sure ither lurkers are as well

>be16
>gf16 from my class slim hot blonde because east europe
>at home alone all night
>weed beer fuck
>convince her to fuck my dog
>agree and like it
>did it many time after
>shit was cash
>pic breed relate

bumpity bump bump

Your honestly making my week thanks so much also screencaping

thx guys glad yall enjoy

for clarification on the d20 rolls we later found out that the first roll was just to get kim jong un to let loose the nukes, the second had to be a 20 as it would determine whether the missile would make the trip

bonus
>>also forgot about this junior year
>>still pakistan
>>my best friend is colombian delegate
>>committee is talking about the best way to tackle drug problem in southeast asia
>>cue a 20 minute discussion on how we cant use military force to beat up the cartels because sovereignty is a thing
>>Colombiabro has had enough of this
>>stands up, slams his fist on the conference table then yells
>>I FIND THAT THE BEST FOOT IN THE DOOR IS A BOOT ON THE GROUND
>>silence
>>then laughter
>>we pass a resolution that airdropped 12000 boots into malaysia

Every word is gold

My shitty graduation

>at high school my graduation
>cringy as fuck
>band plays pomp and circumstance out of tune with super loud bass drums
>walk in two by two on red construction paper as a red carpet to the front stands
>none of the microphones work
>sound system screeches
>people speaking through the microphones can not be heard
>principal is viably drunk
>he gives a drunk, incoherent speech
>slide show of students who are graduating on an unfocused projector, projecting on to strips of construction paper
>balloons, confetti, and sparkles are in a tear away bag above all the students
>bag is torn and all the contents fall onto one single girl due to the contents shifting to one spot
>I leave and never come back to that shithole

I am so happy not be in high school anymore. I swear every damn day was like this.

>>im still president of the club
>>all my friends are in it just to goof around
>>senior year the conference is becoming more serious
>>im nigerian delegate still in security council
>>(best delegates usually get sc)
>>realize while ive seen and had minor roles in many model un pranks ive never done one myself
>>but im nigeria i cant do shit
>>goodfight.jpeg
minutes into the conference all committees get called into massive auditorium for a crisis situation
>>these are usually fun
>>sc and general assembly members have to sit up front because importance blah blah blah
>>the moderators announce that 3 separate united states offshore drilling drillships have exploded within 2 hours
>>coincidence...ithinknot.gif
>>after a 10 min unmoderated caucus the moderators announce that it was the russians
>>ww3.jpeg

part 2 coming

Bump

Noice

Please continue.

...

Another bump

>>its the east vs the west
>>north korea, china, russia, and a few middle eastern countries
>>every european country save the swiss (neutral of course) and turkey (backing russia) backs the united states
>>every country in the americas backs murica
>>lightbulb.jpeg
>>have my constituents from other committees send notes to all other african countries and india
>>reason that we still need american aid and chinese trade
>>if we form a giant coalition and stay neutral we can focus on war profiteering and get rich
>>mission WE WUZ KANGZ begins
>>we need india to protect us because they have nukes
>>all african nations follow my lead, except south africa because theyre fucks
>>poo in loo says that he has our back
>>wegotthenukes.gif
>>announce to the entire conference the creation of the Union of indo-african nations and our stance on neutrality and plans for arms dealing
>>usa and france bros amused but unhappy
>>russia and china delegates furious

Bumping for moar! Want to know if shitstain coalition pulls a USA and joins war late and wins

bump

part 3/3
>>ditzy chinese security council delegates go up to me
>>bitch and say that they will withdraw chinese trade unless the union of indo-african nations
>>also threaten to nuke pajeet
>>poo in loo pussies out despite having nukes
>>fuckfuckfuck.gif
>>brilliant.jpeg
>>motion for moderated caucus
>>north korea (aka Colombia from junior year) asks for 5 minutes on the speakers list
>>fine.lol
>>he talks about how north korea shall be immune to western pigs, how their soldiers are the strongest and the most well fed blah blah blah, and how the west should cower beneath their feet.
>>typical north korean delegate duties
>>speak next
>>announce that after the threats posed by china and the desertion of india africa has "discovered who its true friends are"
>>france and usa bros grinning
>>announce that union of african nations shall back the west
>>then yield my time to algeria who concurs, who yields his time to congo who concurs, who yields her time to liberia who concurs, ect ect ect
>>chinese bitch delegates fuming
>>lol
>>usa uses africa as place to start and base airal missons to china and russia
>>in the international space station canadian and american astronauts stab ruskie with a fork and eat him
>>we win the war
>>mfw i won an award for that shit

I need to know how ww3 ends!

i think thats all the funny shit
i yield the floor to questions
thanks for reading Sup Forumsros

Thank you, now it makes sense

that was some good shit user

:49am
fuck

Thank you i t was worth only getting 4 hours of sleep