/dg/ depression general
>blog about your life so others can tell you you're pathetic
i'll start
i'm fucking depressed, fellow faggots. stayed home from college and work today to drink. got involved at a shitty lgbt org on campus and now i've gotten myself tangled in all these social obligations. my grades are beginning to tank and i just want to lay down and sleep for eternity
Other urls found in this thread:
soundcloud.com
twitter.com
>be me in shower
>pretend i'm a giant bar of retarded soap and i can melt off my retarded female hipbones, rearranging the pelvis into male sexual dimorphism
life is good
no its not. lets be real here
I feel upset and confused about my gender still, worried over trying to cope with psychosis and socially isolating myself.
Just be normal you fucking embarrassments to the human race
Why do people say there's hope to get better?
my best friend keeps trying to kill himself
the stress is killing me
im just a hypocrite for trying to stop him
neither of us really have a place in society
neither of us have hope for a happy future
sometimes i wonder if its better to just let him go and i can follow him a few months later
The le depression meme strikes again haha. I'm really sad too lol.
>he has to be breeder scum and date some random chick he met on the internet
There is no hope.
I think about killing myself everyday. I dream about killing myself every night. In every dream I always don't have enough bullets to end my life for whatever reason.
>20 year old bi guy here
>tfw a friend of yours tells you that before she had a bf, she had a crush on me but she never had the ovaries to confess, and his bf is ironically your BEST FRIEND
>tfw you are forced to live surrounded by idiots in a fucking military residence while studying physics
>tfw you have a crush on a classmate
>tfw you get drunk and high and he confesses he is bi, like me, but he doesn't accept me "by now" because he "got emotionally damaged because of a recent relationship"
>i ask him if he is going to go to a halloween party
>tfw HE FUCKING SENDS ME A PICTURE OF HIS NEW GF
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>my friends abandoned me in halloween (i think this happend because there is a friend of them that is afraid of me and they value that new dude more than me)
>REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE
>proceed to drink as much vodka and absinthe as i can
>worst halloween ever
>monumental hangover
>proceed to slam my fists to the closest wall
>repeat until my hands hurt as much as my heart
>now, there is a "crater" in one of the walls of my bedroom, with some bloodstains
>tfw you change the "i wanna suck the last drop of your cum" for "i wanna rip your limbs one by one and eat them while your new gf is getting tortured to death and forced to watch"
>tfw you know that it will never happen
>(REEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE)^3
>slam fists and legs to the wall, HARDER
>get tired
>cry until you sleep
>tfw you have a nightmare about this because your subconscience is way too fucking troll
>tfw you are a masochist but you can't even handle all of this pain at once, ironically
So much pain... I need a punching bag and a naked full body massage.
no real friends
crap job shit pay
no gf for over a year no sexy for over a year
dont have a car yet
all i do is smoke weed and play xbox on my time off
i buy a bottle of whiskey just to get myself drunk and happy but mostly just happy
i have no real interests or life goals other than to get by
should i do it b/ ? i dont want to but ..
Don't let your dreams be dreams.
>19 year old confused guy
>Just graduated last year
>Went to shit high school
>Spent summer before senior year constantly partying with 23 year olds
>Spent entire senior year high and had almost no work (Purposely been on track to be ahead for my senior year, ended up having 4 free periods). Literally have no special memories and barley can remember anything at all.
>Didn't even walk, just went to graduation really high and watched all my class mates walk.
>Went with guy best friend who I have extreme feelings for but I think it's because I get extremely determined until I get what I think I want then I lose interest completely and just blow the other person off because they always take offense to this and get very angry.
>Still spending as much time as I can high, but working a shit job at the same time.
>Have multiple major issues building up
>Just waiting for one to really fuck me over and maybe it will finally give me motivation.
>Feel like I'm a different person every other day
>Never even genuinely dated a guy
>Can't manage to find a guy
>Wouldn't even be able to handle the relationship like I am with every girl I date
>Finally lost my v-card (Had plenty of opportunities, was just always to lazy to put in the work on my end), and couldn't even stay hard.
I'm so fucking confused, and dealing with a wave of depression after like 2-3 continues good days. I knew it wasn't going to last.
>tfw needed a good scream and just screamed into a pillow so hard I lost my voice and have a headache
Fuck. Completely forgot to make the point I was building up to with all the high school bull shit. Fuck. I feel like my last years were a waste. My life so far has been all about that last year, and I felt like I wasn't even there. I just didn't want to be, but I don't know why.
so u got gender dysphoria (maybe tras male?)
me too, i got depressions, BPS and self harming behavior. mybe u we can talk? iam AFAB and very unsure about my gender. sometimes i just wanna rip my chest off.
I was extremely depressed during college because I had no skills whatsoever and feared for I would forever work in a grocery store.
Somehow graduated and I make 65k a year now but im still depressed how is that possible???
>be me
>semi-closeted in HS
>could've had two 8/10 boyfriends
>turned them both down, b/c I only want to invest time and energy in someone who shares my values and interests, not someone who's just a hole to fuck
>have to harden myself for this, especially since the second opportunity was a *thicc* (I mean, THICC) twink
>overcome sexual desires, act in my rational self-interest, and move one step closer to becoming the Übermensch
>but suffer from loneliness, and feel that my youth is wasting away as I wait
It's not depression, but it's close.
s'up? looks like you have things in order
asshole
i'll have you know i did the exact same thing to my ex and ended up losing him due to my inability to show vulnerability ruining my sexual performance and constantly needing to keep a mental checklist of every single thing i was doing.
just warning you that this will end badly if you don't learn to trust the person you're getting emotionally involved with.
>be me
>successful, good job
>got plenty of girls, relationships if I want them
>go to parties and socialize and all that shit
>still have suicidal depression
>managed to turn the sadness into apathy but thats about it
>feel nothing but still want to die
It never gets better, Sup Forums.
No matter what you do, what you achieve, you will always feel this way.
>19 year old bi male
>been on track at community college to go to be able to transfer to pretty great university (cheap, right down the road, looks good for jobs, etc.)
>Finally get to last semester at community college
>realize that I don't actually want to go to college for what I was planning to (economics)
>application due by end of December
>haven't even started on it
I'm fucked. I really have no idea at this point what I want to do with my life except maybe do something with the movie business since that is the only thing i find interesting.
Sounds like we're on the same boat. I shitposted my entire senior year (no joke, every hour I had nothing to do) and the one time I had sex I couldn't even cum, idk if it counts or not then.
Some self harming folks here?
Bullshit. Of course it can get better. There must be something missing. What do you really want in your life? It's a simple but effective question.
Yep
BPD/NPD
I'm a fuckin winner, I'm goin to school, got a nice job, movin outta my parent's home soon, live n the city, and stackin my money as much as I can.
Welp thought it would be a thread to discuss depression, instead it's all about sexuality, i'm out, fuck you guys.
Tired and sad and angry at everyone all the time, the little things set me off but I never react or lash out. I don't know what I look forward to every morning when waking up, it's the worst part of my day. I have to practice smiling in the mirror so I don't scare people or bother my friends. Spending money makes me happy, but makes me feel really empty when it's over and I realize what I've done. Mostly just on items I think will improve my life like nice clothes or stuff for my room. Lots of friends and admirers just for my kind attitude, but on the inside I think I'm close to going off the edge. Money, good looks, "friends", none of it really matters if you have nobody to really care about deep down. I'm thinking about getting a dog for that reason, I just need something to take care of
You need a break, a change of scenery can be the best anti-depressant. Suspend your study, just tell your college how you need a break due to personal issues. Get away from all that shit for a while, have a good time.
I cried from a random ptsd flashback for an hour. I've only been sober for 5 months and I really want to smoke a bowl but I can't.
>had a psychotic break at the beginning of the semester, heard voices telling me I'm worthless and should kill myself
>got put on antipsychotics, then was extremely depressed, felt empty and wanted to die
>put on antidepressants, not as depressed but having hypomania occasionally (diagnosed bipolar)
>still feel empty
will get diagnoseed with BPS soon too. wann show me ur scars? i like scars.
>confessed to female friend
>rejected
>she promises we won't distance and will stay close
>she can't help but tell me about guys is crushing on
>says this one guy she likes is "total boyfriend material"
>something I'm not
>starts fucking me up bad, no concern that I confessed a week ago
>ask her to please refrain about talking about her love life to me, just for a while until I get back on my feet
>week later
>she cannot resist gushing over another guy to me
>we spark giant fight
>i snap and point out how she is so distant now, only ever talks to me about guys she likes
>"Look user, I still love you. So much. As a friend. So please calm down."
>forgive her and she immediately stops replying and leaves
>look on her instagram
>she's gloating about some guy she has a crush on
I'm getting so fucked up. It's causing me nightmares about this shit. Why does she have to be so vocal about it
>30 years old
>lesbian
>never dated
>never kissed
>never so much as been invited to a party
>came out 10 years ago
>mentored lots of younger LGBT people in college
>they're all successful now while I'm stuck in a dead end job in my hometown in Kentucky living with my mother
>totally ignore me when I try to reach out for help in turn
No good deed goes fucking unpunished. I just don't understand how you can ignore someone you know asking for help.
where do you work
Time to fire up the Ovens
Are you fat?
i always had the privilege of knowing there's no one to count on for help...
thats really shitty and im sorry
to 19 yr old bi male who no longer wants to do economics
u have time
start the first sentence today .. write the 2nd sentence tomorrow.
and u are 19 man! u dont HAVE to know what u want to do with ur life!!!! u r not fucked!! u could spend a year working and then apply to film school. u can do what u want x
No, worse. Skinny as a rail. Simultaneously seen as a freak, yet assumed to find relationships at every corner. Fat people have it easy in Kentucky; they're like a third of the goddamn population.
More importantly is where do they live? Opportunity is geographical.
