I'm dead Sup Forums

i'm dead Sup Forums

i spoke to my relative on skype after like 6 years and lied about a bunch of stupid shit to impress them, like how i work as a photographer. i took a few pictures with my phone, she was impressed and asked if i can help with a picture of her grandson, who is my cousin in some way, but i never seen him.

up untill this point.
my grandma didn't tell me what to do with the picture, she just said make it look "ok".

what the fuck does that even mean, "ok" what do i need to fix?? we all see the elephant in the room but how the fuck do you even start?

she's my grandma and i want to make her happy but i don't know how, she cought me in a trap here
fucking help me, she's old, i don't want to break her heart cause she'll straight up just die

bumping for hope

Bump for Bullshitting op.

Is this the picture? So you're not a photographer but have a phone that's capable of duping 80 year old grandmothers, right?

well go back and think about your experience as a photogrohwaitnevermind

put the kid on a stool, clean background, good natural lighting with no shadows in frame, 2/3 rule, ez pz

then get him to play outside, take well-framed smiling shots on shitty playground equipment

and finally, take him to the basement and make him strip naked for the last few shots, if you know what i mean

OP here

i did not take the picture, they took the picture and sent it over to me via skype

the pictures i took for her were different. i took random pictures of stuff

this dog

sunset

i live like 20 minutes away from woods and went there with my bike fast, it was getting dark

nigger i am not a photographer what so ever, i lied about the whole thing. i said that in the op

The sunset is nice but how did you impress anyone with that dog pic

This is such a Seinfeld dilemma and now I'm realising why people hate that show

she is 73 years old and i talked about the color contrasts and how the black makes the orange pop. it was to show i know my shit about the RGB stuff, i used that word alot too, lot of RGB balancing and shading going on there

i was making it up on the go

the basics take an hour or two to learn if you know how to look up shit.
if you don't even know how to do that, i have no sympathy for you.

if she believes you to be professional after seeing these you could just as well wipe your ass with the pic she sent and she'll prob be happy

you're fucking retarded aren't you? you think i didn't look that shit up, i don't have time to learn how to photoshop for the sake of one picture, even if i did watch your 4 hours worth of how to vids, it'd look like aids. i want to impress her for once

there is no catch here
no troll
no joke, no twist
no nothing, this is just me fucking up with my grandma. again. she caught me trying to suck myself off when i was 15 and we had this weird fucking relationship ever since. but i really love her and gloated with something that i cannot do.
and it just sucks man

then how cant you make shit up anymore? tell her the car makes the natural lightning bad and light/dark balance is all fucked up and needs higher ISO to work it out and shit and you need to set up some studio level lighting but it aint cheap bitch takes about 5000 to do that but you know cheap contacts and can do it for 3500 rly great photos of your grandson. now youre ready to ripoff ur retarded grandma

*No catch here* guys

seriously, just tell her the truth. Tell her you wanted to impress her. You don't want her dying believing in someone who isn't the real you, do you?

Alright no worries. I'm a professional photoshopper.
I'm not lying.
Better then this it aint gonna gett
Thank me later.

Do you want someone to know the truth or to be happy and proud? OP can't you say to grandma that you are MAKING photos not photoshoping them?

>asking help for shopping a pic
>in Sup Forums

>asking help for shopping a pic
>not thanking me for helping.

You should at least use your photoshop skills to teach the fuckwits something, you twat.

Here OP, now you know where to aim your $60 android smartphone camera.

is there really anything to be said other than you deserve it?

Send her this user

Just lie again and tell them you are not exactly an old fashion type of photographer, but media and computer kind of stuff. You do graph and shit digitally. just confused poor grandma with modern technological terms t

TELL THAT BITCH TO DO IT HER SELF. LAZY ASS OLD PEOPLE.

...

go on fiverr/whatever: find a tog/retoucher, pay them to do cool shit with the pic. send to granny.

...

was hoping this turned into some creepypasta about the woods

use a fucking Instagram filter

In all seriousness this could work

this

Clearly she wants you to lighten the skin tone. A lot. Until it is ok.

...

you could just join the navy and actually do that stuff,

then you can lie about being a seal too.

LMAAAAAAAAO

excellent work

kek

I see what you did with the mirror xDDD

Send it back the way it already is.

If she old as fuck she probably won't even notice.

gimme a bit user. keep this thread alive

Wow you really are a helpless retard.
Nothing in here will help with your severe retardation to where you can't even pretend to be a photographer.

Please just kill yourselves and spare the world the cringe of your existance

Fixed it perfect for you OP. Your grandmother should be very happy with it.

send her this op

Better than nothing

photoshop dildo in mouth

your grandma would want it that way

good guy Sup Forums

Looks good honestly

I've been trying to find the hidden penis. Nothing found during search.

Nice

You are a photographer not a fucking wizard. Tell that kid to stop being such a faggot and maybe things will work out for him and his gay pictures.

This thread.

Is it just me guys or is that a fucking cock behind the air freshener hanging from the mirror? At first I thought someone shopped it there, but then I looked at the original and it's still there, please tell me I'm not the only one that sees is.

this is gold

i saw that, thought it was shopped, kek as fuck

Holy shit I see it too

Op WHATS A MOTHERFUCKING COCK DOING BEHIND GRANN'S AIR FRESHENER!

Jesus dude just turn up the warmth- makes any photo look lit af

did a few for you op

1 of 3

2 of 3

3 of 3

Also the padlock in the image looked out of place so I went ahead and took it out for you op. Forgot to do it to the 3rd image tho. If you want me to do the 3rd, leme know