H-hey Anonymous, do you n-need any help?

H-hey Anonymous, do you n-need any help?

Does l-life have you down, d-do you have anxieties or troubles y-you need to talk about? Are you just n-not feeling like you want to?

I'm h-here for you, so sit and drink s-some tea with me, okay?

Fuck you, there is no tea.

Fine I'll make tea, have your bump.

hey

H-how dare you! There is ALL t-the tea!

Hi, nice meeting you again.

Hi I am dog.

...

This is cool as fuck. Thanks user.


I have severe anxiety and cannot date girls I do not personally know. One night stands are acceptable, but I feel empty inside.

I am utter trash and worthless, just talk down to me, or just talk in general.

Then why am I thirsty?

sup slut

I don't know how to behave around people and I'm scared I will never find out.

I see stuttering is the new all-caps or capitalize each word trend...enjoy, you special snowflake.

...

I am a merry man. Thank you for the offer.
How is life treating you as a lyrical spellcaster?

...

Start talking faggot, I need someone to look down on.

Need water.

I wish you could help me
what kind of tea are you serving tonight?

Those stockings...

I strongly approve~

You can lead user to the tea, but you can't make him drink.

I'll be lurking and chiming in from time to time.

Shut up you fucking moonbitch

moonbitch

Just be yourself. If yourself isn't good enough then fuck off and learn how to be alone.

Who's that little character on that chair there?

I didn't know these threads still happened.

Alright moonbitch... let's see, I like NTR, and i usually cut ties with friends because it's hard to deal with them.

H-have you been to a doctor?

A-ah? Why are you trash?

*blinks* W-what do you mean?

I'm g-glad you asked!
Tonights tea is ZEN!

Hi there Alice! I'd love some tea, but you can let Anonymous have his first.

I love Alice's Threads~

You have Cirno's support when I become president!

- Cirno

BECAUSE THERE IS NO TEA.

I'm delighted that Hillary and her corrupt friends at the DNC got what was coming to them.
I'm terrified at the price we may have paid for that.
I'm relieved that this whole shit show of an election is over.

I could use a drink. Tea please.

Im going to be straight forward with you, I would like to see you naked. but I could actually go for a good talk too.

Check'd the moonbitch

who's the bitch now

Don't you see it?

The tea was inside you all along!

fucking moonbitch

Thanks fam.

T-three times a week! Usually.

T-that is Goliath! She's a b-big girl!

S-sorry, I'm not very pretty

Also something something verging on becoming a virgin 30 year old waste of life etc.

NTR is good shit. I don't give a fuck about your friends. Tell me why you're trash, I want to wallow in your misery.

Go be a faggot somewhere else. Just because you are retarded in real Life it doesnt mean you need to spour your autismo spaghetti all over Sup Forums you subhuman nigger

hello again.

I am feelings incredibly stressed out. help me feel better?

I have been feeling like shit recently, I currently am doing my teaching practice (I'm on my last year of english pedagogy) and I feel that I'm not ready to go and teach properly, I feel super anxious and don't know how to cope with it.

jalp?

what's stressin you user?

*giggles* Oh Sup Forums, t-this is my home!

For better or for worse, you are stuck with me.

*wraps her arms tightly around you and squeezes* Tell me what is wrong, Anonymous.

Put that coffee down. Coffee is for unstressed people only.

Is this some allegory for friendship bullshit? I get enough of that from my Chinese cartoons.

*blinks* W-why would you be a waste of life? N-nothing wrong with being a virgin you know.

Ah, s-sorry Anonymous, I got side tracked.
Here, l-let me pour you a cup

I deal with stress by shitposting, and there's never been a better time to break into that business. The market for memes is about to go through the fucking roof.

coffee is for unstressed people that's why i take 500 mg of caffeine a day and im still stressed, coffee ain't good enough

are you?

Is this an ego boost for you?

Plan your life better and maybe it won't be falling the fuck apart? Temporary relief from imaginary people on the Internet won't save you, friendo.

Is this real? Is there actually a girl dressed in a maid outfit asking about our problems? This cant be real. That must be a desperate dude (With really pretty legs)..right?

wellcum back,have you a good lemon tea please.

You think I'm fucking with you?

I am not fucking with you.

Checked double dubs

Why don't you help him with that then?

Ready to give up on life but my ego is too big for me to give up. Is that a good thing?

Hey Alice, I feel like noone believes in me and it kinda sucks. I do well for myself but I'm always unhappy - I can cook great meals with fresh food but I have to eat them alone.

Thanks for the tea.

>*blinks* W-what do you mean?

I say and do things and they aren't received the way I expect them to be.

I don't understand what people are trying to say, or how to talk to them without upsetting them.

Well, maybe maybe not. Might make more sense if it's a trap

>Why are you trash
I have the same problem as this user. I feel like nobody likes me and nobody will ever love me. I think it all stems from being bullied as a child and having a bipolar mother who was prone to fits of anger. I think about killing myself everyday and many times throughout the day. I know live is going to change for me because I'm too scared to change it and I know I'm the only one who can

The fuck are you trying to say?

checked double DOUBLE dubs

Not at all.

I've b-been away from sex for five years now. Not s-sure if the hymen grows back though!

S-sorry, I'm a girl!

N-no, just Zen!

N-no one wants a cob webby vagina, dear Anonymous!

...

My brain is the worst it's ever been. I feel like a TV wall in a thrift store, where all the TVs are tuned to different channels, and everyone's fucking with the remotes.

I got close but then fucking blew it with one person I met at a bar last night. Was emailing back and forth, then suggested going to get food, and then they shut down. Fucking stupid. I'm terrible with flirting.

The fucking fascists have a supermajority in the house, senate, and a fucking president with a goddamned dead ferret on his head after walking around a fucking paintball course without a mask on. To be fair, I'd go right for his face, too. It explains why it's orange.

If healthcare is rescinded, my wife's healthcare will go down the drain unless she gets a fucking job which I'm not hopeful for at all. I love my wife. But she's progressing at the speed of a fucking gen 1 USB cable. First she wants to get everything in the house sorted out since we just moved. Then she *might* get some sort of part time job at like 10 hrs/week. I asked her to make a resume because there were a few job openings at around those hours, but I don't think she did jack shit.

Then there's my roommate, who's been unemployed for the past year. He's supposed to be in charge of the kids but he's fucking terrible at it. Barely watches them. The house is always a fucking mess. I've had a maid I've been hiring to keep the house clean 1 day a week (not like it fucking does much since the house is a fucking disaster not even hours after she leaves)

After looking at my budget I decide that I'd rather have money, than not live in a house that's a fucking mess. So I'll deal with tripping over everyfuckingthing that the fucking kids leave out. Maybe it's worth the $380/month (more than my rent, btw) to put up with the fucking mess.

At least I live in one of the most progressive states in the country. I can at least hope that they'll maintain the healthcare system.

I didn't know bitches came in 'Moon' flavor.

>N-no one wants a cob webby vagina, dear Anonymous!
Bullshit. Do you know where you are? Virgins would take anything.

Trips confirm

How's that tea OP?

it's not the idea of being a virgin, i can probably lose that at any time, it's the fact i have nothing at the end of the road i see
Only now this year do i see it's pointless

I believe in y-you Anonymous

i am quitting my job tomorrow and moving to the other side of the country. i am making last minute arrangements for everything, and i have yet to solidify plans. i want this so badly though. i hate my job with the passion of a thousand suns, but this move will entail weeks of stress. Not to mention going back to Uni as well will add to the stress factor as i try and hit the academic life full throttle once again.

I am taking a leap of faith. i believe in my conviction, but the unknown is stressing me horribly.

Hey man, when it's go time, it's go time. I got shit to do so I hit it hard

...

>Autism: The Thread

>cob webby vagina
I'll take what I can get if the girl is half way tolerable

Nice Trumps

will you teabag me
>pls no bully

Totally. It's everyone else's fault you're a bitch. Definitely not your own.

I think I might be an alcoholic

>N-no one wants a cob webby vagina, dear Anonymous!

There are certain particular things I would do with such, actually. It would be most enjoyable to me. To you, who knows. But it's worth finding out.

I admire the effort and OC you put into making this thread. Please be a regular. Thanks.

Same tbh fam

The man who I considered to be my father passed. Don't really have any energy for hobbies. I just work, get some OT if available come back and sleep. Haven't played any video games lately they're no longer entertaining. Lost contact with my closest friends. I'm okay though I feel numb.

Thanks for listening to me ramble.

kill yourself

Nigger

Nigger

I have a good job, and a wife of 10 years that I still really love and have fun with (thankfully she's not a nag). I don't want kids and she is fine with that, so we have a dog and a cat that I'm really attached to. But... no matter what I'm still either super anxious (panic attacks, etc.) or depressed to the point where I can't function at work. I'm also on my way to becoming an alcoholic, and make sure I don't drink during the week (mon-thurs) just to be sure. Why can I never be happy despite all the good in my life?

get rid of everything you can

give it away

if it's not irreplacable or you need it to live tomorrow, get fucking rid of it

t. 3 cross country moves

ps. it's fucking worth it

>T-that's silly; I'm n-nothing special
Clearly you are if you feel the need to stutter over the Internet. Don't you want that user to be happy? Why would you offer him help then shut him down?

more like
>Guessing if this is a trap or a girl thread number 54935

Nigger

Alice, the hymen is just a meme. I do have to commend you on your post-sex abstinence though. Personally, I'm a 24 year old virgin, but it doesn't bother me much

You DO realize Alice is a crossdressing dude, right?

No doc for me :( I could, I have good healthcare.

I'm just an anxious turd.