I want to kill myself, so can somebody give me advice (about how to suicide...

I want to kill myself, so can somebody give me advice (about how to suicide, do not tell me not to do it fucking faggots) cause its the first time of course and im a bit confused, also the less pain the best but if not its fine. And again do not tell me not to do it, i want to do it so shut up if you dont like it please.

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=cqaPZR4M22w
twitter.com/NSFWRedditVideo

lookatmeimanattentionwhore.jpeg

Fucking do it, and livestream it, faggot.

Shove these dubs down your throat you fucking whore.

if you got the cash for it I've heard the least painful way to go is to get a NO2 tank and a mask and suffocate yourself that way

Oh boy.

Listen, kid, if you were serious about this you would have simply googled the answer.

Instead, you come here attention whoring looking for people to tell you not to do it*.

I'll help you out:
Don't kill yourself, things get better.

*I know you explicitly stated that you did not want this, but you are transparent as fuck.

Good luck.

degenerate, Trumps America has no place for you

Just hang out a bit, Trump will deport a bunch of useless brown people and shit will get better, unless you're brown then yeah you should probs roll out.

blow your brains out, can't buy a gun? stab yourself in the ear with a broken hanger. Just be sure to poke towards the back. if you fuck it up you will be retarded for the rest of your life.

Don't be so complicated to want to know, just do your life then think again about your death sentence. One shall not want!

/thread

>how to suicide
lrn2google faggotron

try sodomie

why an hero when you can shitpost?

Take a belt and wrap it around your neck. All you need is 3kgs of force to block the blood going to your head.
Should take 20 secs to go out, and another 2 minutes to die.

Cut your wrists OP, it is the fastest way.

>guize im really sad and dont want to live but i dont want pain and will you hold my hand too pretty please. Also bring your linkin park cds.

Oke

Take a van with display on the side TRUMP and go to the Afro-American neighborhood of your city

> "It's my first time"
> As if anyone is a pro at suicide

Go to a black area with a trump hat. Tyrone will shoot you and hey your fam won't have to pay to clear their failure child off the walls.

bitch if you really wanted to die you wouldnt be looking for attention on Sup Forums fuck off and do it faggot

Hey you could just wear a turban some false beard and learn some arabic sentences... take a faked bomb belt and just run towards some military area... they will take you down :)

They would probably shoot him in the knee and then interrogate him for days until he admitted to being the head of ISIS, at which point they'd lock him in a hole for the rest of his life.

Live stream an do a backflip of your nearest parking garage someone will record

overdose on heroin, ecstasy and valium. thats how a friend of mine killed himself

What you need to do is swallow a magnet, then a few hours later swallow another magnet. The magnets will attract and tear you intestines apart, you'll then die of internal bleeding.

>you'll then die of internal bleeding.

It's eternal bleeding, you fuck nugget.

take some inspiration
youtube.com/watch?v=cqaPZR4M22w

Don't cut yourself like said.
8% of all cutting suicide attempts succeed.
I say you should just jump.

ssshhh i'm trying to save him

You want have to suicide if you send me your location pussy

Use helium gas. It is completely pain less

tell the local hospital and kill yourself in a way that does not damage your organs
you may want to die but people who don't need those organs
if not, do whatever the fuck you want. hate that guy? kill him! you are gonna die anyway, don't want to kill anyone? buy a fuckton of heavy drugs, again, you are gonna die so who the fuck gives a shit

probably nitrogen is better
I am nott sure but helium could be toxic, nitrogen is not: you just die because you do not have oxigen anymore

It just prevents oxygen uptake into your system why allowing CO2 excreetion. This means you don't feel the need to breath even as you die

>probably nitrogen is better
Yes, but helium is easier to get.

100% behind this. When I finaly get the balls to kill myself i'm probably gonna take someone out with me. Don't be a pussy OP.

nigger your death will be in vain I assure you. Nothing will please this world more.

Kek

...

Holy fuck one of the youtube comments tho.

Dear user, sometimes suicide IS the answer. I'll help you with a cheap and painless method of suicide. This method is called the Coal Room suicide.

You need :

-A metal bucket
-Coals
-Thing to start a coal fire
-Enclosed space.

1. Place coal in metal bucket, this is to ensure you don't inconvinence other in dealing with burned property.
2. Get into encolsed space with firestarter and coalbucket.
3. Seal enlcosure so that mimimal air is flowing into and from it.
4. Start coal fire and wait for 10 minutes. You'll lose consciousness and die within the next 15 minutes.

This method is the most painless, cheap and humane way to end your life. Hope you find what you need in life, poor user. Maybe in another life.

...

go out and fuck a hooker
come back home, put plastic bag over head and suffocate yourself

You could actually substitute the iner gas with Carbon monoxide, CO, not Carbon dioxide. CO will bind with your haemoglobin better than oxygen. You'l die painlessly and with dignity.

were do I find carbon monoxide?
Is it the same thing as breathing from a car's exhaust pipe?

top kek!

Okay, you seem pretty determined, so I'll tell you the most effective, painless way.

>seppuku via chainsaw.

I know, counter-intuitive, right? You'd think that shit would hurt a lot? But you never hear any samurai lumberjacks bitching about it, do you? Well there you go.

Godspeed, and Do It Faggot.

Yes, you could also obtain it from burnin coal.

massacre some Chad's in a school somewhere

KEK

The best way to kill yourself is nembutal. A drug specifically designed for suicide that they use in progressive european countries.

Fast. Pain free. Dignified. and you reduce the amount of trauma of someone who will find you by not being hooked up to some freaky helium tank with a bag over your head.

You can either get it on the deep web, or ever the counter in mexico if you want to have one last trip before you die.

>painless
kek
If the space is tight enough you'll feel your lungs burning. Also due to lack of oxygen your body will put you in a state of nervousness

No user, do it in a room specifically. Lung burning is a reaction of the body because of Carbon DIOXIDE. Carbon monoxide acts pretty much like a more potent inert gas. That is why bagging your head is uneccessery as the CO would be more readily bind with haemoglobin.

you should do auto erotic asphyxiation but use super glue as your final lubricant for a painless pleasurable experience, and then there is the funny bit where they have to pry your dick from your cold dead hands, go for it!!, you can do it buddy!!!

I once heard about this story where this girl was chained to the floor in a cult sacrafice and all the cult members died because of smoke inhalation. She was the only one to survive because she was low enough to the ground not to breathe much in.

Yes, it is extremely quick to lose consciousness in CO smoke. The danger of burning house also lies in the CO smokes, as it is what kills you first before burning to death.

tonight im gonna party like its nine teen ninety nine,


Hold up it is