>Be me
>Watching Disney's Hercules
>Zero to Hero starts playing
>Father comes into room
>Sees Herc
>"Fuck user, that's the third time you've watched this today."
>He takes the disc out of the dvr
>The television doesn't change
>"FROM ZERO TO HERO"
>Father starts flipping the shit out
>Tries to throw a chair into the television
>"IN NO TIME FLAT"
>Sound starts coming from everywhere
>Entire neighborhood can hear this shit
>The chair gets thrown back at Father
>He's knocked out
>Run outside
>It's Ancient Greece
>Brown Women in togas are shouting
>"HERCULES HERCULES HERCULES HERCULES HERCULES HERCULES"
>ground cracks under me
>Hercules busts out of the Underworld
>Music stops
>He slowly walks towards me
>I look down
>My skin slowly starts to change into a dough-y sort of texture
>Feel myself slowly increasing in size
>Holy fuck, I'm as tall as a skyscraper
>Herc jumps up and lands on my sponge-y head
>He drops his skirt and plants his asscheeks right onto my face
>The brown women rise into the air
>I'm completely made of bread at this point with a ginger pushing his trouser-hams directly into my squishy skin
>Of course, I should have known
>Herc was on a roll
Be me
fuck you
Stranger things than that have happened, OP. You're not special.
Since announcing a report is against the rules, I'm just going to tell you that I would have reported you but instead found it more compelling to tell you that I would have.
Did I actually break a rule, though?
This has to be a new meme
not bad OP
kek'd hard tbqh
You can't take a DVD out of a DVR... Come on man.
...
Stop trying to make Hercposting a thing. It's not going to happen.
Check these dubs.
I'm just here for the Reddit collage
Not bad, at least this isn't a Got thread
...
...
What a pro.
Hercposting is like trying to kill a hydra
The only way to stop it is to jump on the hydras back.
bump for hercposting
>be me
>Sees a thread on Sup Forums
>Laughs my ass off
>Mother comes in the room
>She looks at me with horror and disgust
>I told her that Disney's Hercules is the best movie
>She slapped me in my face
>Then out of the board
>Herc came out and stood between me and my mother
>He takes out a sword and slices her left nipple
>Her left arm and left leg were sliced off too
>Herc then turns around
>"It's gonna be all right"
>ITT: Killing Hercposting before Hercposting has even become a thing
>Ancient Greece
>Brown Women
Found the guy who hasn't seen the movie
Phil mentions Cleopatra so historical accuracies aren't exactly on the top of their lost with this movie
>he hasn't seen the best disney movie
the muses are black gospel singers
>i-its not historically accurate
Reminder that Scar from the lion king was the Nemean Lion
so i have to fug OP?
i did not select a picture, how did this file carry over from Sup Forums Hiro?
>He drops his skirt and plants his asscheeks right onto my face
Wouldn't mind this tbqhwyf
>tfw when no Herc
Why have Herc sit on your face when you can get Meg?
Fucking Hercposters, man.
my first childhood crush were the muses. Especially the main one.
Plus them bring infatuated with a white man made my little boner harder
>not just going to straight to Zeus for endless non consensual ravaging
>create your own hercs through twisted mythic biology
>share them with Zeus in a never-ending cycle
Tito climbed into Reggie's room and immediately punched her in the face, knocking her out cold. Upon awakening Reggie found herself bound and gagged to a chair. Tito was naked, standing in front of her with a big Hawaii boner staring her in the face. "As the ancient Hawaiians used to say...it's time for a dicking!" And at that, Tito leaped forward and grabbed Reggie's undeveloped breast. He grabbed with all his might, and ripped the skin from her body. Her muffled screams fell flat, and no one came to her help. The blood aroused Tito more than he'd ever been aroused. It reminded him of the stories his mother used to tell him of the ancient Hawaiian sacrifices in which the subjects would receive wounds to which the sacrificers would rape. He couldn't wait, Tito grabbed a hammer and smashed at Reggie's ribcage, again her screams were not heard. After breaking an opening to her insides, Tito plunged in. He thrust in and out in complete ecstasy. The pain was unbearable for Reggie and she lost consciousness. Tito came almost immediately, but he was by no means done. He pulled out of her chest, his PENIS dripping blood and semen. Tito cleaned his dick off with Reggie's tongue. Tito tore out a few of the ribs he had broken and shoved them up his ass to stimulate his enormous prostate. Tito then undid Reggie's restraints and began fucking her now lifeless corpse. After deploying his Hawaiian happy sauce, he decided he wanted a better look at Reggie. Tito shoved his hand up Reggie's ass. He thrust it in as far as he could and grabbed on to the first organ he could, and then pulled out. He ripped out her entire small intestine and part of her large. Tito started to giggle and coiled up the small intestine like a rope. He noticed the sun was coming up so he had to finish in a hurry. Tito went to his clothes and dressed himself. He pulled a large knife from his pocket and began to skin Reggie's body. Just then Tito remembered, he was not man, but bear. He Skinned himself
to reveal his true identity, a Grizzly Bear. He sat in the center of the room for several hours until Reggie's father came in. "Reggie it's time for schoo-HOLY FUCKING SHIT A BEAR OH MY GOD REGGI-" and Tito attacked and ate Ray. Then Tito went outside and let out a bear noise and a ray came from the sky and swept him away to his home planet of Canada.
jesus how long as it been since this was last posted
What have you done to my beautiful thread?
Made it better is what.
Reminder made a joke about a story in which a guy fucks his own mother.