Give me your best advice for fixing a destroyed relationship. Broken trust, insecurities, constant fighting...

Give me your best advice for fixing a destroyed relationship. Broken trust, insecurities, constant fighting, mismatched world views. I want to die trying to fix this piece of shit and so does she.

Give me your big guns.

Dump her sorry ass before it drags on or before she dumps you first and takes control of it.

Make her feel sorry for herself. Then down the road you can control the situation and fuck her when you want / rekindle it.

Girls can rebound much faster than guys. Almost instantly actually and if she really wanted to she could probably bang all of your male friends.

Rebound with someone hotter and you'll forget all about her.

Good luck user

Do something massive for her. Something you usually wouldn't do if your life depended on it. Something she would love the shit out of. And do it on a regular basis. Sacrifice yourself for her (not in a literal sense, you get what I mean). It will pay off in the end.

tried, failed. you just end up fucking each other up mentally more and more until you're broken wrecks of people who'll never be suitable to be in a relationship with anyone.

If you're going to die trying, you might as well get to the dying part now.

Boi u gay as hell

both of you Chuck it in the "fuck-it " bucket and go your separate ways

36 yo oldfag here,trust me,90% of the things you mentioned cannot be repaired/regained ever again,if you don't have any kids with her move along user.Enjoy life,you'll make it,and with enough luck,find someone again

I do so i cant. I want it to work. How do we start again?

reincarnation

Are you me? Nah, in my case she doesn't care and wants me to just leave. There's a 2 year old kid involved though, and I made it clear that if I leave, I'm taking the baby with me.

Pay people to kidnap her and put her in a van so you can rescue her.

Hey man, I was in a relationship just like this for the last two years. The way I fixed it was taking a step back to see the relationship from the outside, and then I dumped her. It was hard, but how do you read what you just wrote and still think you're going to just "fix" things. Relationships end either voluntarily or not, but they all end. That's life. Stop clinging to a sinking ship

Go to counseling

wants bigs guns

> not specific about what happened.
you not being real about this?
constant fighting
>domestic violence
broken trust
>cheating bastage
world views
>too much ego
Being an asshole doesn't make you alpha.

I don't think you really up to it OP.
My reason is, if you ain't really up to talking about the details anonymously, how you going to do it in person?

You'd have to be willing to change everything.
Like 12 step sorta changes.


Give up your pride, even when you're right
Get professional help for anger managment
Take/accept responsibility for your own shit and manage it. Means saying sorry and making amends.

If you want to give things a chance you need to hit the reset button on everything.

That means giving some level of trust or atleast respect to that other person. Start doing things for them and for the household to show you are the alpha- not some bullshit dominance display, not because you need approval or reinforcement. - just do stuff that needs done. Do stuff for her. for her offspring and she should be sucking you off in no time. If she really is that mixed up about it, she should respond to real change. That means put down your vices, gambling, porn, drinking, the fucking remote and pay more attention to what is at hand.

Last realize it takes 2 and even if you do it, do it for yourself or that 2 year old; not for her. You can't just be doing stuff for her to stall things out and try to keep her from leaving. Each person makes there own choice, if she doesn't choose you and you were only doing it for her, then it is FML. Do it for yourself. to be alpha, because it needs done. If she doesn't respond to that, kid or no kid, you better off moving on because she hasn't learned how to respect/respond to that.

also is she asian or spanish?

True Lies much?
How many times have you seen it?

This is pretty much the only way user.

Get a Bible.

Find common ground, affirm to one another that you love each other. Don't get in frivolous arguments about bullshit like politics. Open your mind a little to the merits of her points of view and invite her to do the same. Learn something about yourself and the prolly faggot dickgirl you're havin gay sex with.
>/thread

What if she cheated?

Then leave. That damages trust. How can you be with someone you don't trust?

I'm just going to hijack this thread since OP seems to have fucked off.

I'm on almost the exact same situation, see here We argue a lot about anything and everything. Usually because I disagree with her about something or other, she starts to talk over me, I yell or swear, and then that's suddenly the topic. "You yell too much, you swear too much". I've had her say "you swear so fucking much. Fuck." To me.

We got physical once and it entailed her slapping me 10+ times until I lost it, slapped her back, she called the cops, they told her she's a retard and not to start shot she can't finish.

She started talking to her ex a couple years ago and started to make plans to go on a vacation with him behind my back. I found out by accident when she left her email open on my laptop. Since then, I don't trust her and end up looking through her emails once in a while.

She says I cheated on her about 4 years ago. I went to a bar, a drunk ham beast hickey'd me, I told her about it right away but she thought I was fucking someone else.

She's a liberal, I'm conservative. We're both on the extreme end of either side at this point.

Keep asking and I'll answer to the best of my abilities.

Rebuild trust
> not continuing to violate it
no room for self-defeating bullshit, that has to go.

that she swears in response to your swearing isn't so much paradoxical as it is reciprocal or situational.

it is sad that women think they can slap/pinch/throw heavy/sharp/dangerous objects and think it is not abuse b/c it isn't a punch.
> i feel you. I been there before. had the bruises to show it.
So basically she agreed not to press charges because you could?

Liberal/Conservative really don't matter much. It is like the difference between value and policy debate.
> Differences can be beneficial. Thinking exactly the same as someone else it more like mental masturbation than anything. Couples that lack inhibitions or empathy reinforces their crazy in many forms.

Someone said focusing on common ground instead of differences.

>Take a page out of the BSG series and start saying frak all the time.

>Give up bars, drinking, hanging with the guys
watever.

Only do counseling if you both want to do it. If you ain't really willing; it is nearly pointless. Given that also you should want to do it.

You should want to go. Realize you aint perfect. Even if things seem shitty- whatever human element you have that doesn't work in this relationship wil. still exist in your next relationship.

Consider if you already have children and history, you probably have more together than apart. You should try to salvage.

Go back and look at old pictures etc. Try to recall what your initial attractions where. - what made it work then? What has gotten lost.

Don't make the mistake of thinking Respect is earned- Trust is earned. Respect is given.

How long have you been together? Domestic situation?

She swears as much as I do if not more.

The cops showed up, looked at the bruises/scratches on my face and asked me if I wanted to press charges. She started to complain that she's the victim, and the cops said something like "when I'm done talking to him, you might need your right to remain silent". I didn't press charges, so they said they'd report it as a consenting physical altercation.

I agree that being different minded should inspire great conversation and debate, but it usually boils down to "you AGREE with that!? You're a fucking nazi."

Unfortunately she and I no longer share any common ground. We don't eat the same foods, listen to the same music, have same parenting ideas, etc. I can count on one hand the number of things we have in common, and two of them are being human and being alive.

I gave up the bar scene after that incident to prove that I was being honest. 4 years down the road, she still throws it in my face.

I want counseling, she doesn't. Says that there's no point, and I'm wasting her youth. She's 33, I'm 31.

We've been together for 6 1/2 years, have a baby together, rent a house together, and live with her two teenaged kids from a previous relationship, and her mother. She's Vietnamese, I'm east coast Canadian.

You need smaller/faster reply or this is going to 404

I'm on mobile, but I'll do what I can.

You're an idiot,user.You're gonna get played again,good luck