When's the last time you had sex?

When's the last time you had sex?

10 months ago

never have, likely never will

13 August 2015

Sadly this

2006

Last night

mah nigga

this is now a feels thread

This

Bout 30 min ago

This

A more than a year ago. Girlfriend left, was sad, redpilled myself on MGTOW, havent had an actual relationship since. Mostly, just concentrated myself and work, got myself a motorcycle too. CBR1000rr, thanks Sandman.

thats a feelsbadman
my advice don't be a beta

10 minutes ago.
>Feelsgoodman.jpg

Tonight, with a co-worker.

This
Story of my life

saturday

Go on...

2009 or 2010,can't really remember. Kek

Right now

I have a lot of respect for you, user. That's good to hear you're doing well by yourself.

A little over a year. Gonna get laid tomorrow. Feels good, man.

Well you know where I will be. Right here

Lol, shit. It happens pretty much every night.

She flirted with me since day one, which was about 8 months ago.

About 4 months ago, she grabbed my dick out of nowhere, and we just kept feeling each other up when we could at work.

Two months ago, we got drunk after we closed, and I fucked her on a table at work. Now we fuck every night we work together. It's kinda shitty because she has a boyfriend, but she's a freshman in college so it's not that legit. But she's been increasingly wanting to sleepover, seemingly every night. I just hope it can continue, she's hot as fuck and has a tight body

Got pics, user. Make me jealous.

Two hours ago in the shower. Then thirty minutes ago in bed.

A little over a year ago. I'd like to get some, but I'm not doing bad.

Big deal, you banging the typical woman. I'd say be careful though, I got fired for fucking my boss at work, its so easy to get caught.

6 months ago. First time. NEVER GIVE UP, BROTHERS.

You know how it is with chicks now. It's all done via Snapchat now, and they know when you take a screenshot. Plus, she only sends the very occasional provocative picture. She's the classiest slut I've ever dealt with.

Trust me, I'm a believer in making videos, but that's a girlfriend-esque kinda thing. Got any risky behavior stories?

reverse virgin here. my last time was december 2002.

What the fuck is a reverse virgin?

She's not even a woman yet, just an 18 year old chick. It's a close knit shop, I wouldn't get fired. I'm not saying it's a big deal, the guy just asked me about it lol. I wish I was creative enough to make an enticing greentext story.

you have sex, then one day just stop and never have it again

Use context clues you oaf

About 8 hours ago.

Shit
...
That's a scary thought.

Literally earlier this afternoon. Fucking this 8.5/10 cutie from my work. Hope to make her my gf.

Celibacy. Okay.

last week with a 44yo women.
big boobs.
also rimmed me.

Had sex in June. Sad thing is, I live with my gf. She's always horny but I am just not sexually attracted to her anymore.

Monday last week

not by choice though :(

She's gonna cheat on you, you nigger.

>gonna

not sure if i had sex, but if i did the last time was when i was 11

Three months. I'm in a relationship, she's waiting on a blood test because some dumb fuck got her with a needle (she's a doctor). I hate my fucking life.

LOL should an hero now

Thats not sad, not yet at least. Whats really going to be sad is when you become a cuck. Not that she isnt cucking you already, I mean when she actually does it right in front of you and you just take it. Thats when you become a sad waste of a motherfucker for life and not even killing yourself with offer some redemption.

last thursday night.

>be last thursday night around midnight
>get text from gf
>"i'm horny"
>go over to her place
>start fucking
>pull my dick out to change positions
>covered in blood
>"oops. i thought my period wouldn't start until tomorrow"

you should end things, it's not fair to either of you if one person isn't into the other anymore.

Lmao I had sex on last Saturday but my gf had to go to her hometown for a week lmao

And the Lord said unto thee;
"Fuck her in the shower"

Three weeks ago.

Nah, she's too nuts about me. We have been together for 4 years and we have too much invested for her to go and cheat. We both masturbate, that's good enough. Believe it or not guys, not everyone is at risk of being cuckolded.

>inb4 denial

It's just how our relationship works.

i took a shower and then she gave me a blowjob

> 'Last Time'

We're very much in love, just don't have sex anymore. It isn't that weird, were pretty much married.

you can shower me if you want

Bout 4 years ago almost sealed the deal last night but i nose dived

June... of 2015. Sometimes I regret starting

last time my wife and I of 5 years had sex was in december 2012
we're getting divorced. looking around on the dating market to see whats available nowadays and I see there is nothing good left

A few months ago

It has changed a lot since then man. Best of luck.

Uhh like 9 months ago? But I'm with this new girl and hopefully soon I'll get that nut in.

Last week. Use a condom boys, baby scares are no joke.

Jesus Christ dude :S.
Just go to a bar, download tinder/grindr, whatever. It's not about dating now, it's a matter of making sure shit still works.

Been trying to go celibate for a few years now but never managed.
Decided to try and go all of 2016 without, got drunk and fucked up once.

It gets easier, but there are tough times, usually when alcohol is involved.

So 6 months ago I guess?

1 1/2 hours ago.

...

>inb4 denial
Yes, you have gotten to the point of denial in which dont even care about being in denial, look at you!
>We have been together for 4 years
So? Women cheat regardless of how many years theyve been with whatever guy, makes no difference, its just in their nature. You arent giving her sex, thats what shes supposed to be doing to you so, props there to you. Obviously using one of their tactics agaisnt her is confusing her but, that fact of not giving her what she wants will be enough reason for her to cheat on you and to justify it to her that what she will do is righteous.
Dude, you remain willfully ignorant and that makes you a huge fool, you deserve what you will get.

Yeah I think Im going to have to do something like move to Poland or somewhere in eastern europe where girls still are traditional and conservative and the culture instills moral values.

nah Im not into degeneracy. plus if I did descend into casual sex with sluts, it would be hypocritical of me to want to someday find a traditional girl

3 minutes ago wif ur mum, faggit.

tonight with your mom and sister

2 years plus some days ago.
Fuck.

Alright boys here's the story of the last time I had sex
>

Sure, I got one. No pics though, for the same reason.

Went to her place Valentine's day, were both high schoolers. I was a senior, she was a junior. She told me her parents are out of town. We get to railing and right in the middle, I hear this loud angry knock, like the kind where you think your gonna die when he walks in. It was her fucking dad. We both put our clothes on freaking the fuck out. I hide behind her blinds for, like, 15 minutes and he finds me, puts 2 and 2 together and scolds me. Her parents kick me out for good. I drive home, go to bed. I was so scared i was gonna die that i forgot I still had the condom on.

Best pussy I've ever had. Totally worth it.

9 months before you were born.
With your mom ahahahhaah ugitit?

Like a week before my ex and I split so like over two months now. Fuck.

While a lot has changed, things where pretty bad back before I met my wife. I was looking for a traditional long term girl but every girl I got with just wanted to fuck around and as soon as I mentioned anything about a relationship they all got scared and stopped wanting to fuck and said stuff like they didnt want any commitments or attachments until they get to like 29 or 30
I finally found a girl from eastern europe that was very traditional and wanted to get married. It was really awesome having a traditional girl, up until I lost my job and couldnt find another one and she started frequently telling me that she expects me to be the man and she lost respect for me. All of that lead up to her wanting to get divorced. Just to be clear, she was extremely frugal and pinched every penny, it wasnt an issue of golddigger it was an issue of she expected a traditional husband to be the man and the provider.

I don't have sex, I'm a wizard.

I'm a nigger and even I can relate to this.

she doesn't have to know you are filming

In B4 hand.jpg

about 3 hours ago. you won't believe it, but i cannot tell anybody IRL i might as well tell Sup Forums

>be me
>in my english class at uni
>teacher always ignores me
>turned in shit paper because busy with other shit
>prof says come see her in office hours
>first time she's spoken to me all term
>go to her office hours
>she asks me why i turned in such a shit paper
>give her some bullshit excuse
>she says, "oh, ok. i thought it was because you could tell i was attracted to you and you thought you could get away with slacking off"
>wat?
>she goes on to tell me how attracted to me she is
>puts her hand on my leg
>instaboner
>after a bit more small talk i get up to go
>she gets my back to the door and kisses me
>rubs her belly against my crotch
>i am diamonds now
>picked her up and fucked her against the door

And then you woke up

as i said, you won't believe it

>uni
you spelled junior high wrong

kek

tuesday

And then you realized, it wasnt actually real and happening to you, you just got way too into pornhub.

penetrate when i was a cum the ovum of my mom

Wizard in World of Warcraft true?

Last time I had sex was January 2014, had other sexual experiences since though.

That's because you hang with white folk my friend.

HERE HE GOES AGAIN. Can't fucking take you anywhere, Steve.

what is a "sexual experience" in your book then, if it's not sex? a wank?

1 month ago

Its killing me , ex was a sexual deviant who wanted to fuck all day. She even cooked for me when i got back from work. Insecure as fuck tho

>she