ITT We discuss the stupidest shit about our jobs

ITT We discuss the stupidest shit about our jobs

>Be me
>cook at bowling alley local chain
>nigger brings his own drink in
>"Sir, we know you brought that in so we can't refill it just in case you ask"
>niggers come
>walks up to us
>"ca' aye 'ave a 'kp"
>"sure"
>Give him a Styrofoam
>nigger and his hoe are at a lane
>she has green hair like harley quinn
>an hour later
>nigger nigs
>"yo mang cn aye git a refill?"
>"No. Like we told you, we know you didn't buy a drink"
>"It's because I'm black isn't it?"
>"No it's cause you'd be stealing and it's wrong. Buy a drink and we will give you a refill"
>Don't blame the nigger, mostly cause it's 3.18 for a drink... a normal Styrofoam cup
>Nigger gets mad
>Nigger talks to my manager
>Nigger is told the exact same thing

This was months before I worked there

>We have an arcade
>it's alright for children
>Nothing amazing
>Child gets tickets
>whats something from behind the counter
>doesn't have enough tickets
>child cries
>one of our employees offers him candy
>dad finds out about this
>dad flips his gourd saying that someone there wants to molest his child
>explain to the dumbass it was just to help him stop being upset
>dad doesn't listen
>dad gets physical with the manager
>someone calls the police
>this is not the first time this has happened
>we have dumbass customers
>kids are also pretty fucking tard
This also explains why we don't get good games in the arcade... Fuck get us Street fighter or Pokken or Tekken or Mario Kart FFS

Other urls found in this thread:

youtube.com/watch?v=oKpfjVkmGvA&
twitter.com/SFWRedditGifs

selfish bump

1 more selfish bump then i give up

>be me, yesterday
>be stockboy at a grocery store chain
>run promotion on a particular sort of cherry tomatoes (0,5 kg in 1 package)
>there is a 1,79 € pricetag
>there's a sticker informing about 50% discount too
>old lady comes
>"how much do these 1,79 € tomatoes cost after the discount
>tell her it's 0,90 €
>"are you sure?"
>yes mam
>"are you sure?"
>YES
stupid cunt people piss me off

>work at a food plant
>place is cut into different departments
>management decides to move around the senior managers of each department
>my area gets the most hated moron that caused people to quit enmasse
>he come sover bringing his dumbshit ideas that caused people problems
>starts dictating shit left and right
>doesnt know the systems, but oh lordy did the Faggot read the SOPs
>he expert now
>tells everyone how wrong they are and how nothing is done right
>takes daily walks to find "problems" only to make our lives as hard as possible
>fucker shits on every single system cause he thinks he knows what hes doing
>every day i contemplate slashing his tires
>Writes everyone up for the most dumbass shit
>HR has had enough of his shit and has told him to stop
>he now tries to be incognito about his crap

I hope karma reams his ass one day

>Be me
>Mandatory one-week work somewhere
>Dumbass me went to a supermarket
>On the 5th day a black woman walks in with her two bitchass daughters.
>The niggers ass was almost wider than the isles
>Nigger talks into phone while the kiddos start opening candy packages
>Run over and politely tell the children to buy them or stop
>NIGGERTRIGGER.exe
>Gets insulted and called a racist
>Keepcalm.png
>The oldest daughter jumps me from behind
>Nigger goes apeshit and tries to kill me
>Guards break up the fight
>She leaves with her kids
>Finds iPhone on floor
>No password
>Gets fired and goes home with a blue eye
>Opened the niggers social media and uploaded porn
>Wiped the phone and started using it.

Slash his tires you faggot. No one would blame you, and you'd be a hero

>work at wallyworld electronics area
>have a useless dep manager
>she does nothing all day
>friends with all the higher ups tho
>sometimes she leaves early because she can
>swamps us with work while shes out back doing god knows what
>super bitch to me in particular because i told her off at one point
>cant stand it anymore and leave to another area
>find out years later that she got demoted to a people greeter like status until she quit

fun shit

that sounds fun as hell to watch

>come into work seeing district manager there
>managers all looking worried
>district manager obviously not pleased, being stern with the managers
>the district manager leaves
>one manager comes up to me, "hey user, I know this is a lot to ask but could you clean out from behind the server's side station"
>look behind the side station, Jesus Christ this place looks like it's never been cleaned in the 15 years this restauarant has been here
>manager tries to coax me "we'll buy you free dinner"
>realize the restaurant was probably going to be inspected tomorrow and I don't want the place to go under
>begrudgingly accept, spend 2 hours scrubbing and cleaning
>manager comes up to me after I finish
>"heyyyy, can you do the other one too? We'll give you a $25 gift card"
>look at that side station
>Lord have mercy
>I thought the other one was bad
>it looks literally hazardous, like designated shitting street toxic
>REALLY don't want to do it
>manager begs, I sigh and do it
>3 hours for this one, now covered in filth and I don't even know what
>finish it, sure enough inspector comes next day
>restaurant passes, managers thank me a lot
may have sucked doing it but feels good I helped people out who really needed it

>work on construction sites across America as explosives engineer and wrecking-ball operator
>demolition work pays very well, requires advanced degree and extensive training
>always stuck working with what I call "navy blue collar" types, no real talent or skills
>conversations always revolve around sports or "muh Chevy" truck babbling
>nearly everyone knows 100% stats for athletes and scores for games, common knowledge out the window, no academia at all
>faux-racists on every site, complain about niggers and spics taking jobs blab blah blah
>ask them all why they worship sport niggers but demonize others, a nigger is a nigger
>they all rage and screech in autistic tones/volumes afterwards until the project ends

>be me
>be working at plastic molding factory
>not hard, take plastic shit, check it for defects, remove any excess material and package it
>everybody pulls their weight and does their shit
>except the fucking technicians
>they take naps on the conveyor belts
>they refuse to come fix the presses when they're supposed to
>shrinkwrap machine is too hot, burning holes in the shrinkwrap? lemme turn the heat up for ya bruh
>they also like to come tell me how I'm doing my job wrong and how to do it right
>frequently inform them they aren't my supervisor and they can fuck off
>steal their magnets when they aren't paying attention
still better than fast food, I'll say that.

I'veseen this too, working in carpentry you get a lot of the same general people you're talking about. I just don't get it.

youtube.com/watch?v=oKpfjVkmGvA&

those morals tho

i like my job. can't think of anything stupid about it

My boss!

>work in wastewater treatment plant
>at the time was working at the front of the plant
>all water is screened coming into plant
>catches rags and trash that people flush
>plus other things
>one night found $20
>wrapped $20 in paper towel
>take it to 7-11
>give it to Hakim behind the counter in exchange for 12 cups of coffee for my crew
>cringe when he touches bill with his hand
>have found other things too
>rings
>packages of drugs
>credit cards
>most disturbing was a fetus.

Similar story

>work in construction in UK
>on site in Glasgow
>having lunch in canteen
>some half-nigger asks canteen lady for punani instead of panini
>whole canteen erupts in laughter
>people clapping and whooping
>punani becomes word of the month
>everyone repeating it, whole conversations revolve around it
>work has to stop because all anyone can think about is punani
>facepalm.jpg
>this is the kind of shit that happened in school, and these morons still find it funny

>packages of drugs
Reminds me of when I had to flush a bunch of pills. Shit hurt :/

people like that don't grow the fuck up till they have kids or their life is about to end up in a studio apartment with their dog Doug... These are the people all you want to do is tell them to fuck off cause they think cause they got laid at their Highschool prom, they are the shit

It's 0.895 tho

That stopped for me when I was 10.

>be me when i used to work for shitty airline
>cuck customer comes in wanting to check in bag
>tells me he has flight for boston which has left/ended for the day
>"oh sir ur flight left"
>cuck customer "no it's for tomorrows flight"
>mfw al queda hijinks
>advise him that no we cannot hold onto his bag for a flight for tomorrow
>starts yelling he'll never fly with our airline again

i have more stupid/crazy airport stories if anyone wants them from when i used to work here

do eet

redneck

>Be me, manager in retail outlet
>Customer asks to buy product
>Tell him we currently have no stock of requested line
>"Show me"
>Takes customer to empty shelf
>"you no have?"
>Walk away in disbelief
The customer is never right.

>wait tables at a casino restaurant
>group of 6 chinese guys comes in
>it's a complimentary dining area for patrons of a certain level
>only one of them fits the criteria, and they can only bring one guest
>supervisor says he's a high roller and to let it slide
>they spend hours and hours there, when partons are expected to leave after half an hour so others can eat too
>the entire time they do nothing but order drinks and yell for service
>they finally leave
>3 dollar tip

Hope they choke on smog.

>be me
>dont have job

>be me working $9 an hour for shitty airline
>horribly understaffed and filled with incompetent workers
>gets stuck doing baggage claims aside from ticket counter
>anyways cx frequently forget their checked in shit at the gate
>first day at the job and drunk fat ass and his equally fat ass wife mad bc their baby carriage didn't show up at the conveyor belt
>white nigga starts yelling and throwing shit
>tell him to go upstairs to the counter and i'll get it for him
>badge doesn't work so i go upstairs too to walkie-talkie coworker to bring it
>they take their time bc they have to fill out forms after flight
>white monkey starts screaming at everyone including me at the counter demanding our badges and last names
>begins tearing apart the line and screaming "I WANT MY BABY STROLLER GIVE ME MY FUCKING BABY STROLLER"
>everyone at counter just looking at him
>eventually someone from JetBlue calls security
>mfw the cops show up and he goes from 100mph-0mph

Good on you user

>be me
>french as fuck
>work in a restaurant
>bitch customer comes in
>she only speaks italian
>no french
>no english
>bitch spends the whole time speaking to me, asking me shit and whatsnot
>in italian
>inb4 i fuckin hate italians
>i try to communicate
>but bitch still stands looking me in the eyes, talking to me in italian like if i was supposed to speak fucking italian
>at some point i get tired of this shit
>tell her i'm fucking tired of this shit
>bitch suddenly speaks perfect french
>to my manager
>bitch got me good there
>well done bitch
>i ever find you, you get the knife
>bitch

cont'
>be working at the counter after finally losing my v-card
>decide to wear red lipstick bc what the hell
>dark af nigger comes up and asks about southwestern airlines
>sign above clearly mentions airline name
>airline name is not southwestern
>advise him and he starts hitting on me after
>mfw he's holding up the line

me or the retards?
Granted, I live in GA but I dont consider myself a redneck. I consider myself a bit higher cause I don't sound southern

im still learning French

tits or gtfo

>recap: be working for shitty airline
>it's a shitty month bc delayed flights, cancelled flights, birdstrikes, etc.
>basically u see the worst in people at the airport
>been working a lot bc gotta move people to the next available flight and/or refund them
>anyways worst flight cancellation ever that day
>white bitch complains and complains and doesn't understand we can't do anything for her
>starts making up shit claiming supervisor promised her a free ticket, free food, etc.
>no way in hell would this ever happen
>after an hour of dealing with this bitch finally insinuate she's a liar and all hell breaks loose
>bitch demands a gate pass to tell supervisor i called her a liar
>demands video copies of the cameras above
>i clearly stopped giving a fuck the moment i gave her her damn gate pass

>be me
>Lawyer at my own firm
>I'm my own boss
>Don't have to deal with the shit you all do
>Try getting an education, you Trump-supporting cucks

>I hope karma reams his ass one day
No user, you need to be the karma. May your actions be just and swift. Rise to become alpha.
>start a confrontation with him among your coworkers
>work him up enough to take a swing at you
>let him miss
>fuck his shit up

Missed opportunity to use pic related

final:
>worst was when i needed the money and worked overtime doing the priority line from 8pm-12pm for delta airlines
>fuckers argued about a stupid fucking line
>mfw most airports don't even offer this at their tsa lines
>worst was when fucktards brought water that was open and gave it to me to drink
>worst was when fucking people thought i knew about their fucking flights when clearly i worked for a different airline
>even best: when people fucking sat on my seat while I was checking people's tickets

i fucking hated working at the airport i don't recommend it people are stupid as fuck and it is grossly underpaid and overrated

You deserve this for working in a casino.
That's exactly what you signed up for.

Italians are subhuman.

>Be tire installer
>big ass ex football looking type middle age double comes in with his 92 Mustang with tires and rims he bought else where
>starts off my telling our service advisors on the front yard counter how it's mint amd not to scratch it etc with a colourful vocabulary
>other guy gets and the customer decides to ignore the signs walk in the shop amd hover over the other tire guy
>politely inform him due to insurance reasons we can't have customers on the shop while work is being done
"FINE JUST TAKE CARE OF MY FUCKING CAR"
>I brush it off and other guy keeps working
>other guy calls me over and says the tires and rims the guy bought don't fit on the rear axle because they're too wide and are hitting a shock absorber that's part of the suspension and attaches the axle to the body
"Sorry sir we can't fit the tires they're too wide."
>His response
"Bullshit I know they fit I had them on last year. You just have to take the bolts out on the thingy and flip it."
"Okay sir but that is additional work not part of the tire installation and I'll have to talk to my mechanics for an estimate."
"Bullshit it's just two bolts just take care of my fucking car."
>me and mechanic look over the problem and the tire is hitting a shock absorber meant to prevent axle hop which is caused when a you stomp on the pedal and whole rear axle will rotate, causing the driveshaft to lock up and destroy a bunch of shit
>mechanic says it's part of the factory suspension so we won't alter the vehicle
>politely inform customer we can't do it our mechanics won't risk it
>demands to see manager then spends 15 mins yelling at him to order the mechanic to flip the shock for free
>manager steps up to the plate and still poltiletly tells him he can't do that since it's their license on the line
>manager is a mechanic as well and finally tells the guy off that we won't put big slicks on his shit box and to go somewhere else.

>be 18
>work at a Gas Station
>frequently asked what are the tricks to winning the lottery (don't play)
>customers always complain about the harm cigarettes do and the price
>customers always make a drink and leave it or even spill it on purpose
>once some middle school kids bought some condoms and recorded it

ITT same thing as high school everyone is fucking retarded

>be me
>who else?
>waiter at moderately upscale steakhouse
>it's 18:30
>4 top comes in
>nobigdeal.png
>looks like a dude, his wife, and their 2 kids
>hostess seats them
>take their order
>still nothing of consequence
>their food comes out
>cool
>19:30 rolls around
>suddenly fucking swamped
>dumbass manager accepted a dickload of walk-ins
>even though we were booked solid from 19:00 onwards
>whatever, just run my ass off
>notice something
>the 4 top from earlier is still there
>busser already cleared their dishes
>maybe they want dessert
>go over and ask
Nah we're fine
>Uh, okay
>flash forward to 21:00
>still a ton of people waiting
>why do all of you want to eat here???
>we're doing our best to flip tables as fast as possible
>manager yelling in the back
>cook having a nervous breakdown
>4 top still there
>just chatting
>15 feet from the line of people waiting to be seated
>why.tiff
>people waiting getting mad
>glaring at 4 top
>flash forward again
>23:00
>quitting time
>rush is over
>everyone's gone
>about to start my side work
>coming out of the back
>4 top is still there
>have to tell them we're closing
>u gotta go
>they make a big fuss of leaving
>kids are almost asleep
WHY DO PEOPLE DO THIS

if someone did that to me i would start jacking off infron of them to show im the real alpha

>Be you
>Be douche since grade school
>alienate everyone around me and argue with everyone
>become lawyer because I want to victimize those who don't like the asshole I am
>get dad to pay my way through school and find a low level associate job at some 3rd tier city
>don't get any clients, no coworkers want to talk to me during the day
>shitpost on Sup Forums and attempt to alienate more people I've never met

> do tech support for shit tier monitors
> been at it longer than the rest of the high turnover retards and don't make shit up like my obese boss
> not allowed to tell people the truth most of the time
> they really don't give a shit about manufacturing tolerances or QC so you can get 2 out of the box that are different hues/brightnesses
> coating can yellow over time
> have to go through all the troubleshooting even when I know it's not gonna work and then forward it up for review when I know the answer is gonna be "just change the picture settings" and I can't tell them to take it back
It's a colossal waste of everyone's time but if the customer is being a dick I enjoy making them waste time

Also fucking dealers are retarded
> 1 out of every 666 or so actually has the purchase date
> they believe their word is law so they refuse to troubleshoot and I happily shut them down
> they have some of the dumbest motherfuckers as techs who can't tell the difference between HDMI and usb or need their hand held through every goddamn thing on a computer

>computer shop stories

>now press enter
>"where?"
>on your keyboard?
>"I HAVE NO KEYBOARD"
>...
>"Oh wait, right"

>"yes, hello, I'm looking to buy some powerline adapters"
>we have x, y and z
>"how many millibits are those?"

>"I installed this microsoft scanner and it says my computer is broken!"
>try explaining for 10 minutes it's a junk program that's trying to get em to buy their 'fix'
>"BUT YOU SOLD ME THIS I THOUGHT I WAS PROTECTED AGAINST SHIT LIKE THAT
I came up with a good analogy to explain how an antivirus protects your computer, I'm sure more of you come across people like this:
>computer = house
>antivirus = alarm
>it will keep most thieves away
>but if you leave the door unlocked (= click accept on everything) they can still get in

>day old pc
>infected through every orifice
>"YOUR GUY THAT DELIVERED AND CONNECTED IT MUST HAVE DONE THAT"

>new ipad/S4/whatever shiny status symbol
>i dropped it/drove over it/dunked it in my salsa
>"what do you mean no warranty?!??"

>computer within warranty
>get bitched at because I won't fix the bloat and virii they installed themselves for free because muh warranty

>be working at the counter after finally losing my v-card
>decide to wear red lipstick bc what the hell

what does that have to do with the rest of your story??

>"my external hard drive crashed, can you please fix it"
>diagnose, it's fubar
>"BUT ALL MY PRECIOUS DATA DAT WAS MY BACKUP DISK"
>if it's a backup, you must have the originals on your computer, no?
>"NO I JUST TOLD YOU THAT WAS MY BACKUP"
>Well, if your data is so important, we can send it to a lab for recovery
>"YES"
>prices start at $1000 not including taxes
>"...nevermind, it's not -that- important"

>"my laptops' keyboard isn't working anymore"
>did you spill anything on it?
>"Nope"
>open it up
>sticky as fuck, brown goo, smells of coffee
>call em up
>someone spilled coffee over it, that'll be €80~150 (depends on brand) to fix
>"ermahgerd"

>"I tried plugging in my usb drive and my computer won't boot anymore"
>check the port
>plastic tab broken off
>all metal legs mangled together and mashed down
>show this to customer
>dat shame

>"my phone won't work anymore"
>did anything happen to it?
>"nope i take good care of it"
>take a closer look
>every corner has some dents
>even the fucking battery looks scratched
>explain this won't be covered by warranty because of user damage
>"omg that happened months ago and is totally not related"

>"my harddisk stopped working"
>"so I opened it up and took a look at it, that arm is just jumping up and down"
>"I checked online and they say you can replace this"
>explain how him opening it up already fucked it beyond repair, and that the people that can fix something like that do so in a controlled environment in a lab wearing special clothing and everything
>tfw that glimmer of hope dies

>customer brings in old pc for repairs
>turns out it can't be repaired
>he returns and rants for 15 fucking minutes about how horrible the service is
>we sold him crap, it is UNHEARD of that a computer dies after a mere 8 years of service etc etc

>customer buys new tablet
>returns the next day, claims it has problems booting
>colleague turns it on, "now what was the problem exactly?"
>"no no no you're doing it all wrong"
>colleague turns it off again and hands it back "please show me the problem"
>customer holds down the power button until the screen comes on
>keeps holding it
>which, of course, causes the thing to turn off mid-boot
>"See! That's not supposed to happen!"
>Sir, you don't need to hold the power button for so long
>"Don't tell me what to do! I know my stuff!"
>other colleague that hasn't heard what happened butts in
>tells the customer the same thing
>"I AM RIGHT AND YOU ARE WRONG" etc
>he gets another tablet (against policy, but we're just trying to get him out of the store by now)
>returns later that day
>"THIS ONE HAS THE SAME PROBLEM"
>Boss flatout tells him he is the problem, and that he can have his money back if he promises to never set a foot in our store again
>customer calls us later that week
>he got a brandless tablet from a supermarket
>lo and behold, same problem
>still thinks he is doing it right and the technology is the problem

>What Windows are you using?
>"Windows 4?"
>"Wut?"
>"internet exploder 12"
>"Windows Vista 2010"
>"Word"
People still say "internet exploder" too.

>colleague gets a call
>customer has trouble with Java update
>somewhere in the process she gets a little window with the buttons "Ok" and "More information"
>colleague spend the next fifteen fucking minutes trying to explain that the OK was to continue
>and not an "OK, I want More information"
>in 4 years I've rarely seen that man upset, but in the end he was yelling

>spyware infected computer
>those typical "ZOMG UR INFECTED BUY THIS TO FIX" programs
>fix it, he picks it up
>calls us 2 hours later, his internet won't work, and that's our fault
>he reinstalled 3 of those progs
>he paid for em

>"I just bought this printer and it won't work"
>take a quick look, doesn't work indeed
>give customer a new one
>she's back within 15 minutes "I can't get the plastic protection out"
>suspiciousasfuck.apk
>take it out of the box
>the flatcable running to the printhead is dangling out the front
>"the manual said to take out all that plastic stuff"
>closely check the first printer
>she managed to yank out the flatcable completely
>and insisted she wasn't at fault, the manual was unclear

>our external drive stopped working
>my brother is good with this stuff, he took a look at it but can't fix it either
>could you try to recover my photos?
>"Sure thing"
>as I pick up the disk I notice the top sticker is loose
>... did your brother open this (the actual disk) as well?
>"Yes?"
>politely explain how it's most likely FUBAR now
>Her smile and optimism: Gone

>customer addicted to some browser game
>plays on laptop with broken fan
>has to -run- to freezer every hour to switch out the cold packs its resting on

>I just lost everything on my phone!
>swipe to next homescreen
>"oh"

I just found it interesting to add is all jesus christ

> Be Me
> Living off Disability
> Get a thousand a month
> Enjoying life without a job or responsibilities
> Time spent eating pizza and sushi, playing video games and browsing Sup Forums

You should have said "fuck the dinner and gift card, now about my raise..."

Stockboy job meaning his education level is shit don't expect math out of him

>old lady calls us about a problem with her phone
>start explaining something
>she stops me because she can't find her phone
>5 minutes later she realizes it's the one she's calling with

>laptop won't boot
>Have you tried to remove the battery?
>"When I push button a slide comes out is that battery?"

>repair a PC
>customer does system restore immediately after pickup, back to the point when it was fucked
>because his printer didn't work anymore
>of course it's our fault it's fucked again

>i wake up
>i don't know who is in my apartment
>i don't know who was there
>my stuff doesn't usually get touched / moved
>I shower
>I get dressed and eat my breakfast
>don't think
>I don't think of it
>I get to work
>I talk to my coworkers
>I forget crimes
>I don't forgive myself
>I inject marijuana
>I inject marijuana with my coworkers
>don't think lasts a while
>it's too empty for me inside
>I don't smile anymore
>I go home andsleep
>i wake up when i sleep the first time

did you get to hang out in the airline lounges at least at get free food?

>40718
>>be me, yesterday
>>be stockboy at a grocery store chain
>>run promotion on a particular sort of cherry tomatoes (0,5 kg in 1 package)
>>there is a 1,79 € pricetag
no its not because you round up, do you even math?

Nope more like
>Be me
>Have tons of clients
>Work at my own firm
>Have tons of friends
>Have more money than I know what to do with
>Shitpost on Sup Forums so you can all feel shitty about yourselves

Similar story

>worked at Italian restaurant while in highschool, as a dishwasher
>bar closed at 11 and stayed open until people left, so hopefully 11 30 or so
>one night it was 11 and 3 people came in
>stayed for a while weren't sure if they planed to leave
>all but me, manager, 1 waitress and the bartender had to stay until they were done.... at 1am
>I had to clean 4 plates and 5 glasses...

these are gold keep em coming

that's really cool user !

hahaha fuck no I worked for a small airport with it's only direct international flight being canada. the only thing i did was get free flights and i would give myself the front seat and free bags bc why not

shitty airline didn't offer food or in flight service so i only flew with them when it was a short domestic flight

>Be day trader
>Wake up
>Grab coffee
>Lose $150,000 by the time I get to my computer
Feels bad.

>a
>short
>domestic

what do you do now?

>be me
>work in sawmill
>fucking hate it but $23 an hour is nice
>drive a forklift
>literally 3 hours of work in a day
>day is 8 hours long
>get yelled at for 5 hours every day because I have no work to do
>$23 an hour to sit around for an 5 hours on Sup Forums and listen to music
>coworkers hate me because easy job

>mfw


Not my fault I do my work 5 hours faster than the last fucker

max benefit for disability runs from 743-860 depending on state.

>autism for 23 hrs/ dollar

What is it with dumb people and sports? Every dumb person I have known was waaay too into sports. They knew fucking everything about certain soccer players but fuck all about anything else.

>Be me.
>Trained and graduated marine engineer with a no-limits electrical degree, plenty of experience from sailing with the worlds leading container-shipping line.
>I tire from sailing and decide on a carrer change - find a job in greenland, being Junior Technical Manager of Shrimp Factory. Doing seven week tours, with my travel-expenses paid, after which I will have seven weeks off with full wage.
The job pays 5000+ Dollars plus, which is an increase of about 1000 Dollars from my time as a seaman.
>Meet the technical manager of the plant; the guys is a truck-mechanic.
>My job at the plant is ordering, project management, staff management, on-call technical assistance for the technical staff (most of the are welders and the sort, so they have no grounds for understanding machinery control, steam-production or cooling) and maitenance-supervision and general documentation.
>Spent six weeks at the plant, and the technical manager is relieved by his back-to-back, who is an electrician.
>Niether of the two has any qualifications for managing the technicians at the plant, nor for understanding half of the machinery or installation - some of the things they say make my head hurt.
>Go home for seven weeks and come back.
>I am told, I will no longer be doing documentation, ordering, project management or documentation because the electrician found it too hard to figure out, who has done what.
>I am now working a 5000 Dollar+ wage doing simple maitenance and day-to-day workshop management...

>unless mommy's with you so you're smart again

ueno-et

I work as a technician for an electrical company. pays well, has good benefits, company boss is super into family shit and likes throwing parties every holiday. the major upside is i don't have to work holidays, it's full time, get free vision and dental, and get 2 weeks paid vacay after 6 months

It's wonderful :^)

...

>be me
>Own a bakery
>Go on travel
>Get phone call
>One of the Bakers got pissed off at other Baker and left.
>Have to work his shift
> No new Baker found
>Get 5 thousand a month more but actually have to work

That's all I got for now, I don't always remember to write em down.

>still be you
>claim my father's clients are mine because my last name is on the door
>claim the people who hang around me ate friends when they just tolerate me because I'm so rich
>shitpost on Sup Forums to hide to the unfulfilled dreams of being a gay pole dancer

they aren't gold. his stories were the most boring here.

23 hrs/ dollar is not the same thing as 23$/hr. that's about 4¢/hr

I work at Dell. All of our product sucks, all of our process sucks, customer experience sucks, no one gets paid, workers look stupid but cannot navigate process until no one can help. Fuck this shit.

I got the most hated manager fired from one of my workplaces once.

> night shift
> working in industrial bakery
> shift foreman but still union
> notice some contamination
> wierd black shit in bread pans
> shut line down, call manager
> manager takes samples says run anyway quality assurance can check in the morning
> notice samples in garbage on way past his office
> take one out and ask if QA had seen this
> QA manager loses his goddamn mind
> plant on emergency shutdown

Turns out that black contamination was carbon/Kevlar from the oven.
Major mechanical damage, not to mention health hazard in the product.

Manager cared more about production than safety.. Didn't report or follow up on anything.

Company had to:
> recall semitrailer of contaminated shit
> repair more extensive damage that could have been avoided
> pay ot to destroy product
> short the market and damage brand

Yeah.. They made a positive note on my file, and that manager "left to persue other opportunities" by the end of the week.

missoula international airport?

i'm typing this on a dell computer right now!!

More like
> be me
> make lots of money, spend it on hookers and blow
> life is good
> one day penis leaking puss
> panic
> go to doctor
> get medicine
> wife calls
> her vag leaking puss
> ohshit.exe
> we argue, I accuse her of cheating
> she leaves me, hires a better lawyer then me
> takes half my everything
> hang myself in my office

I don't know this.

¢ needs to adjusted by either 6 or 7 percent, as I understand. You might expect 5¢/minute in a year or so.

You're a fucking idiot and you're b8 game is awful

You're a chill dude. Respect.
Nah, user is a good person with great work ethic. What a fucking bro, seriously.

nope nice try user

You would round it up to .90

I really like your counters to that faggot, they're clever

A H H H H H

H

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H
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H
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you're the queer who thought you can flip proportions like an asshole.

>maths

You deserve more than a meal and a shitty gift card. If you ever leave, shit on the fucking grill.

fucking this. sport is great if you're fucking playing it, but these fagboats who literally cosplay as team members and just vomit stats and hypotheticals to eachother make me fuckign rage

>be me
>not same person who was trolling you
>just a construction worker who hates rich lawyer fags
>you people ruined America
>one day soon you will all be up against the wall with the politicians awaiting execution
>revolution made America great again
>feels good

Good thread keep it going