Welcome to a new year at Hogwarts! Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words...

Welcome to a new year at Hogwarts! Before we begin our banquet, I would like to say a few words. And here they are: Five. Hundred. Billion. Points. To. Gryffindor.

Thank you.

If Slytherin is so evil and Dumbledore hates it why does it still exist?

containment house, just like Sup Forums

Hogwarts doesn't discriminate.

this, it's basically the Africa of Hogwarts

>was on an undefeated winning spree before the special snowflake harry came along and dumbledore could doll out the points to his own house like the biased faggot he is

Gryffindor or Hufflepuff are the Africas of Hogwarts.

dole, not doll.

ok

Slytherin bumping this thread.
Can we get some points too now?

Dumbledore was already pushing his luck with his liberal policies; he didn't want the 'anti-blood purist is anti-wizard' parents to riot.

This is a fresh new take on the meme, OP. And it's a good one. Thank you.

Because Dumbledore is an aberration. Prior to him all headmasters were full on 1488 WIZARD PRIDE.
The Harry Potter series reflects the authors own sensibilities, that are firmly rooted in the culture wars of 60's Britain. Rowling honestly believes that 50's Britain was a terrible place, and genuinely believes that the rampant social liberalism of today is a great think (even though 17 million people just recently disagreed with that new orthodoxy).

What's some Dumblecore music?

This was the best Dumbledore Michael Gibson ruined Dumbledore.

this is the first timed i kek'ed at this stupid meme
ty OP

...

It's not really worth reading past the first sentence. Muggleborns magic isn't any less powerful than a purebloods.

See, this doesn't make sense once. It is heavily implied that Voldemort's immense power is derived from his unbroken pureblood lineage, all the way back to Salazaar. Dumbledore is also pureblooded, and is the only comprable wizard of power to Voldemort. Harry is ble to draw the sword of Gryfindor - which is also implied to be an extreme act of wizarding ability - because his bloodline on one side is descended all the way back to Gryfindor himself.

Clearly, being pureblooded DOES have an effect on magical prowess. Yet another internal inconsistency of Rowling.

That's actually a pretty good point. Wizard SJWs BTFO

>See, this doesn't make sense once. It is heavily implied that Voldemort's immense power is derived from his unbroken pureblood lineage, all the way back to Salazaar.
Your post isn't worth reading beyond here. Voldemort is a half-blood. His father was a muggle.

yes yes well meme'd OP well meme'd

NEVERTHELESS

fag

But Dumbledore and Voldemort are both half bloods

Both Dumbles parents were magic though.

This is what happens when women write books

>blatantly make shit up and get simple facts wrong about the books
>"kek, fucking SJW women are no much for my superior intellect"

>it's a Harry votes for Brexit so Bulgarian wizards stop taking his kids spots at Hogwarts episode

was not expecting him to go full Expecto Adolfus on Hermione's ass

But SJW women are no match for my intellect though.
*tips fedora* *teleports away*

>Harry Potter doesnt stand the test of time
So weird. I thought for sure we were dealing with another Narnia, but as time goes on I realize the morals and the writing are already drawing criticism. Harry Potter is a product of its time.

*teleports behind you* did you really think it'd be that easy? *unsheathes katana* kid......

If i pull off that sorting hat, would you die?

yes, yes, well done slytherin, well done slytherin

HOWEVER

Forgot rankings sorry boys

Welcome to the dullest franchises in the history of movie franchises? Wow really impressive! Each episode following the boy wizard and his pals from Hogwarts Academy as they fight assorted villains has been indistinguishable from the others. Aside from the gloomy imagery, the series only consistency has been its lack of excitement and ineffective use of special effects, all to make magic unmagical, to make action seem inert.

Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the series; she made sure the series would never be mistaken for a work of art that meant anything to anybody?just ridiculously profitable cross-promotion for her books. The Harry Potter series might be anti-Christian (or not), but itüfs certainly the anti-James Bond series in its refusal of wonder, beauty and excitement. No one wants to face that fact. Now, thankfully, they no longer have to.

>a-at least the books are good though
The writing is dreadful; the book was terrible. As I read, I noticed that every time a character went for a walk, the author wrote instead that the character "stretched his legs."

I began marking on the back of an envelope every time that phrase was repeated. I stopped only after I had marked the envelope several dozen times. I was incredulous. Rowling's mind is so governed by cliches and dead metaphors that she has no other style of writing. Later I read a lavish, loving review of Harry Potter by the same Stephen King. He wrote something to the effect of, "If these kids are reading Harry Potter at 11 or 12, then when they get older they will go on to read Stephen King." And he was quite right. He was not being ironic. When you read "Harry Potter" you are, in fact, trained to read Stephen King

i'm glad people are beginning to wake up to this. i've hated this franchise ever since the books came out and then when my gf at the time had to show me the movies. i can't even explain what it is exactly. first it was the dumb kiddies camping in front of the bookstores. then it was the general soap opera aspect of it all and harry's stupid WOE IS ME act throughout the movies. but m hate for it is somehow more than the sum of these parts, i can't quite put my finger on it

Yeah, and dumbledor's brother fucks goats. Also voldemort is a half muggle rape child.

Heh... Amateur... *takes off cape* *makes 3 clones* This will be fun...

*kills the 3 clones and you* fuck off

Right, obviously the point is that continued dilution will further affect magic ability. It seems like Magic genetics aren't sorely dependent on the parents.

A 100% Pureblood mixing with one Muggle will not affect the Genetic Magic pool of the family. Yet if that halfblood were to breed with a muggle, and that offspring were to breed with a muggle again, etc. one might posit that the Magical aptitude of each subsequent offspring will lessen. It's likely this also increases the chance of children being born Squibs, and reduces the likelihood of Muggleborn wizards such as Hermione being born.

*the real me is revealed to be a clone too* heh... Heh.. I underestimated you... *unsheathes katana* it's nothing personal... Kid...

Was it? I thought the reason they were such powerful wizards was because they were clever, put the time and effort in and had the talent instead of anything to do with blood.

Except Voldemort being a parceltongue, that's pretty explicitly being a certain lineage giving him an advantage.

Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality fixes the entire world behind the series.

>Right, all my facts are wrong but *continues to make shit up*

>Harry Potter and the Methods of Rationality fixes
user, no. It's chock full of bad fanon and autism.

>I suck yudkowsky dick
we know you do, calm down

>this catshit fixes this dogshit
Don't make me post it, Sup Forumsedditor

Yeah. If only they knew he was gay

I know right. He made Dumbledore so agile/limber, I have expected him to do a backflip at some point and tap dance

He was supposed to be a spry old dude, spry enough to go cave exploring with his nubile young apprentice at any rate.

I liked the books growing up but looking at them in retrospect I actually agree with a lot of the criticisms I see. I'll ignore moral issues for now, even just in the world-building and plot a lot of things just don't add up. Compare it to something like LotR. The Ring for example, has this history of where it was before Bilbo found it, it changed hands a number of times etc. There are explanations and histories for just about everything.
>but muh eagles
It's not perfect but much of it is so wonderfully consistent. The world mostly makes sense.

Compare this to Harry Potter. When you look at the series in retrospect, eagle-esque plot holes are all over the place. I'm not just picking on Harry Potter either, I know just about all fiction has plot holes, but Harry Potter is ripe with this shit.

e.g. The Chamber of Secrets. How is nobody just told others about it somewhere in Hogwarts long history? There is a ghost that knew about it sitting in the same bathroom. I mean what the actual fuck?
Certain spells are way too powerful, Polyjuice gets used all the way through the story and even fools the Ministry of Magic. Fans have come up with some clever uses for some spells and there's no explanation for why in world characters don't use them all the time, because I assume Rowling didn't think that far through with it.

>good vs evil makes sense

50s America is calling. They want their worldview back.

>Perhaps the die was cast when Rowling vetoed the idea of Spielberg directing the serie
>die

Yes pic related is unironic

SILEEEEEEEEEENCE!

WELL FUCKING DONE, SLYTHERIN. HOWEVER! YOU SPOILED SHITS ARE RUINING MY SCHOOL WITH YOUR GOD DAMN RACIST FASCISM, I WON'T TOLERATE ANY NEW VOLDEMORTS OUT OF THIS SCHOOL! TEN BILLION POINTS DEDUCTED FROM SLYTHERIN FOR ALL TIME! MAYBE NOW YOU WILL LEARN SOME RESPECT FOR YOUR LESS PRIVILEGED COLORED SCHOOL MATES LIKE HERMIONE!

>punishes Slytherin for being white
>tells them to respect Nigmione
wew Dumbles, is it time for your afternoon nap?

>clifford for president
unironically a top tier book

Spry? I don't remember him having a gym member ship. I'd expect over 50-60 years old kinda spry. But he became to animated in certain scenes.

>most powerful wizards ever
>all ether pureblood or half bloods
>Muggleborns magic isn't any less powerful than a purebloods

Yes, well done Ireland, well done Ireland.

HOWEVER.

TWO GOALS TO FRANCE.

Post what?

>be a wizard
>not casting roidus maximus and cardio vasculusus for perfect gains
>exercising like some common muggle pleb

dubs confirm magic steroids

>be shrimp dicked wizard
>cast penile engorgio for maximum pleasure
>not getting cucked by black dick like some muggle

>It is heavily implied that Voldemort's immense power is derived from his unbroken pureblood lineage, all the way back to Salazaar.

What now? Voldemort is halfblood. Any magical descendant of Salazar should be capable of parseltongue.

>Harry is ble to draw the sword of Gryfindor - which is also implied to be an extreme act of wizarding ability - because his bloodline on one side is descended all the way back to Gryfindor himself.

This is just because he embodies the qualities of a "true" Gryffindor. That's literally what Dumbledore says. There's no implication anywhere that his pureblood enables it.

*unzips pants*
awful optimistic of you, eh kid?
*forces you to your knees*
*tilts your face up and kisses it before shoving cock down your throat*
*facefucks you for 5-10 minutes, then lifts you onto the couch and puts you face down*
*starts to push cock into your ass*
*it curves up, presses against your prostate as it enters further and further*
*strokes your hair as you begin mumbling nonsense*
heh… you like that, do ya kid?
*you begin noticing details like balls slapping against your ass*
*firmly grabs your hips and slowly pumps in and out*
*starts fucking harder and harder until your yelping each time it’s slammed in to the hilt*
*you begin arching and pushing into it with each thrust*
*jerks you off*
*cum in unison*
h-heh… that was good… eh, kid?

yes, yes, well done reddit, well done...

H O W E V E R

great gatsby was kinda shit desu senpai

ITS TRUE

>Muh eagles
Please stop this fucking meme.
The nazgul had fellbeasts
The entire atmosphere in and around mordor is ash.
There is a giant glowing fucking eye that would spot them.
The "my eagles" meme is literally perpetuated by 16 year old autists that feel special for finding plot holes.

i've seen you post that meme about 5 times in the past hour

do you chuckle like a retard every time you do it? is that you at your keyboard, giggling wildly as you meme your delirious ass off?

what's it going to take for you to stop? are you going to be here forever doing this, latching onto the next hot meme and chuckling your life away as you repost it into oblivion, riding the coat tails of people smarter and more clever than you?

an old greek philosopher once said that the essence of humanity is in imitation, and perhaps he was right. perhaps i'm getting wrongly upset here; there is nothing more visceral and honest than monkey see, monkey do, and i can't wait to see you shit that awful fucking meme out again because it proves to me that you are at least human and i'm not surrounded by a haze of dc and marvel shills

Why would you want all the sketchy kids hanging out and scheming? If I were headmaster, I would probably split them up into different houses.

>ywn use multijuice potion to sneak into the female Slytherin dorm, use Petrificus Totalus on everyone and spend all night fucking Slytherin qts with your futa dick

So they con lose point

Silence. Five. Hundred. Billion. Points. From. Gryffindor.

>personal
>not personnel
You had one job.

She is stephen king tier. it makes perfect sense that he would praise her too

Holy fuck you're autistic. 1. Nobody likes stephem king his books are shit 2. Go back to lit

go back to Sup Forums.

never been there faggot, nice projecting, keep posting stale shit you lit reject

Its all bait...brave new world lower than clifford should be a red flag.

>a series loved by tens of million couldnt possibly lead to people seeing the same things. Great job detective thats been a meme for 15 years.

i said go back to Sup Forums.

Like I said fuckface never been there, Harry Potter grossed 7.7 billion dollars in theaters, this is the television and film board. You have a fucking problem if you think its a Sup Forums conspiracy .

commit suicide

this is the most predictable fucking graphic ever

>David Foster Wallace in the tier of fucking Thomas Pynchon

wew
e
w

Are you unironically posting a meme image?

>Harry Potter grossed 7.7 billion dollars in theaters
and?
>this is the television and film board
then why are you posting movies?
>You have a fucking problem if you think its a Sup Forums conspiracy .
huh really makes you think,

...

He's been shitting up the thread it seems

>still arguing with memes for his (You)
Kill yourself seriously

>Expecto Adolfus

Would that summon a ghostly Adolf?

See
and fuck off Sherlock

>le movie
>le huh really make you think
just epic

this meme is kind of funny actually when its not just some reddit/got/capeshit/homo typing the same HOWEVER and then nothing afterwards

>"Why is Sup Forums the worst moderated board on Sup Forums and when will the mods there get fired?"
What did he mean by this Sup Forums?

>FIVE. HUNDRED. BILION. POINTS. TO. GRYFFINDOR.
>The hourglass erupts with red dust and swarms the hall
>The Slytherin table is engulfed in the waves of red glitter, whilst the other houses and staff safely sit atop the ruby sea
>"please, sir!" came from the feeble voice of Draco Malfoy as his ferret neck filled with red glitter, before he was consumed by the red ocean
>"I DEDUCT 10 BILION POINTS FROM SLYTHERIN FOR PATHETIC WHINING" laughed Dumbledore
>All Slytherin points disappear, forming black hole on the place of the hourglass
>Everyone is sucked in screaming, only Dumbledore is laughing like a madman
>credits roll

>artists, directors, scholars and actors
>its real and heres why

>meme posters of /t/v/
>no it's not real its just a meme bane for you and kinosabe
ok then tuff guys who am I supposed to believe? you or the ones that actually have merit?

why is there only one wizard school?

why doesn't each house just make their own school?

>The Chamber of Secrets. How is nobody just told others about it somewhere in Hogwarts long history? There is a ghost that knew about it sitting in the same bathroom. I mean what the actual fuck?

She died when Riddle opened it, which was the first time since Slytherin himself. So no one knew it was there or even if they did, could not open it.

>Certain spells are way too powerful, Polyjuice gets used all the way through the story and even fools the Ministry of Magic. Fans have come up with some clever uses for some spells and there's no explanation for why in world characters don't use them all the time, because I assume Rowling didn't think that far through with it.

Totally valid.

>still going
youre an inspiration to shitposters everywhere

(You)

>multijuice

polyjuice where you keep your own dick?

didn't you watch goblet of fire? there are more schools throughout the world

Oh boy ive never seen that image before either............

>implying people actually watch what they discuss on this board

this

same on all the popular "interest" boards tv v mu