Welcome to the test to join the Andromeda initiative, my name is Jien Garson, the founder of this unprecedent mission...

Welcome to the test to join the Andromeda initiative, my name is Jien Garson, the founder of this unprecedent mission. We are recruiting the best humanity has to offer and we know not everyone can become part of this voyage but those who do could come from anywhere, even from Sup Forums. You'll be tested to become a part of the crew, you can roll, but make no mistake this is a one way trip.

>Singles - Rejected
>Doubles - Part of the crew as expendable, you will travel with us but you won't go out of the ship until we find a new home, that could take decades.
>Trips - Part of the pathfinder's crew, you will travel with us and once we arrive to Andromeda, you can go out with the pathfinder to investigate new worlds.
>Quads - You become a pathfinder, you'll be assigned a crew, weapons, classified data, biotics, transport and everything you'll need for doing your work: find a new home.
>Quints and more - You wake up on Earth, those numbers are a dream.

Begin your journey.

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meh

Instant quints.

rolling

Check these muhfuggin dubs

Us blacks are better at exploring space anyways

Take me away!

Rolling

I guess I'm staying here, in a sex starved marriage.

Sign me up faggot

Rolling

...

Ya know... I feel like my situation wouldn't be unique, had it not been for the fact we are both in our early twenties.

look at my trips pls

I mean. We started out strong. It was sex three times a night on a trampoline!!!! Shit was cash. After several months of that, it slowly declined. 6 years later I'm lucky if I get it once a month.

open.spotify.com/track/4kDxEgxDsxbvepRR3LwpOn

>no gets
this thead is cursed

I am 100% of the time the person who initiates too. In addition, it always ends up feeling like she's just agreeing to have sex. Only like a quarter of the way through does she mildly act like she's beginning to enjoy herself.

This sounds like the new mass effect game

Roll

winrar

Roll

Hey look at that, lucky dubs. Anyways, since it only works out like once per month it is over way to fast, and there's no way she thoroughly enjoyed herself. It's not like I can just jerk off before hand. It's such a spontatious thing that there simply isn't enough time. One wrong move and that shit will close up like a bear trap.

Hell I jerk off so much just to keep from strangling innocent bystanders, that I constantly find myself running out of porn to watch. It's like watching re runs of the fresh prince, only will Smith is played by Melissa May.

Man... melissa may is a cutie. I only wish she wasn't into roodypoos. Like a couple of scenes is alright, but it is like 90% of her content on xvideos.

Let's go.

fuck you and your gay cruise

Idk guys, I've been trying to fix our relationship. It just seems like a boat, and I'm the only person who cares if we sink. Maybe she wants to be a marine biologist? We all did at some point growing up right?

gimme quints

As a dubs guy, can I opt to leave the mrs. At home?

So can I play a beta or some shit yet

red shirt reporting in

Roll I guess

...

Sometimes, I'm unsure if she has a big puss, or I'm rocking a small dick. Maybe even a bad combo of the two!? I bet alien puss will be awesome.

I AIN"T SINGLE

You are going to provide snacks, and nookie on board our venture right? Will we at least have a cute mechanic like on that Firefly show? If I'm stuck on a ship for decades, you gotta toss me some kinda bone right?

maybe you'll let me rename myself to spike or something. I need to get laid man. Balls feel like little heavy moons man. (See what I did there? Brushing up on my space talk. For the trip. )

Alright well, it doesn't look like I'm Rollin better than dubs. And I sure as shit ain't getting laid tonight, so pick me up whenevs.

One last roll for good measure. If post ends in 3, I roll again.

Hey it looks like it is you and me! Glad I'll have a bro to hang with in space. I'll name you Tyler.

Tyler, do you think we will meet hot alien chicks out there man? Think they'll be into us?

Will our earthly pick up lines even work on them? I'll have to think of something, my "charm" alone certainly wont cut it. What about you Tyler, think you'll be able to pull?

...

Wolololo

honk honk

Tyler.... bro... what if... there is like a whole race of lolis.... or what if they all are like... idk. Jelly girls or something. I'm more of a chubby lover kinda guy. Not fat. Chubby. Little more to grab, nice plump tits. Big round ass. Yeah buddy. Dude were gonna have a blast.

Doesn't matter for shit, because the Mass Effect development team hate white people.

woo hoo

Tyler, I regret to inform you, I'm renaming you to Dallas. It's a much cooler name anyways, dont feel bad. We will still have fun!

roll

Hey new friend, I'm Time, you're going to join Dallas and I at the back of the dubs bus, through space! Cant wait!

I want to stay

ayy lmao

FUCK

lol

Also, we're going to need a nickname for you as well... I was thinking Gerald. Does that work for you? It's mature, but I think a Gareld still knows how to party. He's like the old man you invite to a party in your dorm beca use he's the only one you know who still has a cocaine dealer.

Get me off this nigger infested rock

Here we go

i missed quads, doesnt mean im not a faggot though

Hey! We need a nickname for you as well. So Sharonville will do. Sharonville, meet Garald, Dallas, and myself Time! Cant wait to go on an adventure for space poon!

I was hoping Benj. Knew a cool guy Benj and I like the name of it. I hope we get to wear cool suits.

Alright it's getting a bit crowded but I suppose there's room for one more. We will call you Susan. Susan, meet Dallas, Sharonville, Gerald, and myself Time. Nice to meet you, remember to share the alien nookie when we snag some. It'll be tough but we can draw straws and take turns.

Gareld, dude bro. Yes. Benj is so much better. You're great at this. Sharonville, Dallas, Susan, Gerald is no longer gerald, he is now Benj. We will respect his life choices.

Also yes, space suits. I'm hoping for like a samus aran type suit, or maybe a tron suit. I hope because of our inability to leave the ship, they won't neglect us of cool suit privileges.

Op, man... why have you neglected us? I'm sittin here, chatting with my dubs bro, waiting for a pick up. And we haven't heard from you? You good man?

...

Pathfinder right here!

...

Check'm

Me spaceman

ok gaylord

Checked