Dark humor thread

Dark humor thread

Other urls found in this thread:

youtu.be/lNZlx4whyMU?t=1m7s
twitter.com/AnonBabble

How do you get 100 babies into a bucket?
With a blender.

What is funnier than a dead baby?
A dead baby in a clown costume.

How do you stop a baby from crawling around in circles?
Nail it’s other hand to the floor.

How many babies does it take to paint a house?
Depends how hard you throw them.

What is red and goes round and round?
A baby in a garbage disposal.

What’s the difference between a baby and a pizza?
A pizza doesn’t scream when you put it in the oven.

Throwing acid is wrong, in some peoples eyes.

What's the hottest thing inside a dead baby?
My penis

What is black and sits in a corner?
A baby with it’s finger in a power socket.

What gets louder as it gets smaller?
A baby in a trash compactor.

What's the difference 'tween a nigger and a snow tire?

>A snow tire don't sing when you put chains on it!!

What's the difference between a nigger and a picnic table?

>A picnic table can support a family of four!

What's the difference between a nigger and Batman?

>Batman can go a night without Robbin!

What do you call a nigger in a tree with a suit and briefcase?

>Branch manager!!

How do you keep a nigger from drowning?

>Take your foot off his head!

What do babies and baseballs have in common?
The neighbor gets angry when you throw them through their window.

Have you heard about the company that makes landmines that look like prayer matts? Prophets are going through the roof.

And the edgiest thread of the day award goes to...

My sister says she doesnt think rape is funny so ive swapped her pepper spray with silly string. We'll see.

>edgy

These are just sick jokes my friend

My personal favorites are Helen Keller jokes and Challenger jokes.

Did you know Christa McAuliffe had dandruff?
They found her head and shoulders on the beach.

What was the last thing Christa McAuliffe said to her husband?
You feed the dog, I'll feed the fish.

How many dead babies fit in a bathtub?

36.

How did Helen Keller burn her ear?
Answering the iron.

...

A man walks into his house and yells
"HONEY PACK YOUR BAGS, I HIT THE LOTTERY!"
His wife exclaims "Oh my! What should I pack!?"
He replies "HOW SHOULD I KNOW? JUST PACK AND GET THE FUCK OUT!"

Sort of a one note kinda guy aint ya?

...

heard this joke from user here.
what's the difference between a baby and a bag fo coke?
eric clapton wouldn't leave a bag of coke near a window

what's the difference between acne and a priest?
acne doesn't come on a little boys face until he's 12

"Badoom tshhhh"!

>dead baby """"jokes""""

Trying way too hard, my dude

...

How do you get a gay guy to have sex with a women ?

Shit in her cunt

where is that picture dark humor faggot?

what's red and looks like a bucket?

...

mh

Your moms cunt

faggot

nah.
my asshole after visiting uncle Geoff

loot

Whats brown and sticky ?

I saved that

youtu.be/lNZlx4whyMU?t=1m7s

A stick?

Muhammed ali opening a can of coke

...

yw

What's the difference between a sandwich and a dead baby?

You don't fuck a sandwich before you eat it.

...

What's worse than a female driver?

holy shit kill that demon

you fucking casual. obviously you don't know how to eat a sanga....or salad

...

thats my boi chicken lil!!!

#rip

#juggalohomies

burn it

Why the fuck is he using a butter knife?

I said sandwich. Obviously I fuck all my salads before I eat them.

silly string still fucking hurts if its in the eyes.

I chuckled

Okay, that one just wasn't funny. Too much, bro.

What does bicycles and niggers have in common?

They both dont work without chains

wft?

Two?

...

No I've never laughed this hard kys nigger
Haven't laughed this hard in a long while

just google the filename for fuck sake.

We're all fucking sociopaths

...

I laughed

...

best ylyl in a long time. I'm going to the brothel now. cya boys

funnyest video ever

reminds me of 2 reds having a go.
(kangaroo if you're not from australia

You butchered it.

How did Hellen Keller go deaf in her right hear?
The phone rang while she was ironing.
How did she go deaf in her other ear?
The phone rang again.

Who the fuck puts a power socket in a corner?

sauce please chef

where do you send your kid when it's being annoying? to the corner.
it's pretty self explanatory

...

No, jokes are meant to be funny. These are just edgy blurb.

I came here for advise and browsed in to this thread.

Haven't heard that one before! lol xDDD

>hit the lottery
>hit
Funniest part.

Honestly, guys, it's 2016. Do we really think it's still necessary to degrade other humans based on their skin color? Isn't it time we move on from foolish, narrow-minded thinking like this and embrace the fact that despite our obvious differences on the outside, we're all humans with the potential to accomplish wonderful things?

This would be better if it was like 2 copper and a piece of linen.

Goatse

this was a good thread until these/this faggot(s) showed up

The way his body acted during the fall in the river made it.

Here is strangely similar webm. I laughed at it, first time i saw it, becouse of the: 1.)way dogs senseless body jumps upwards (this is the similarity with the indian suicide biker webm, strangely funny static pose of the poor being and trajectory of the fall) from explosion, 2.)smoke from the ears.

Tosh did this joke in 2011

how many licks does it take to get to the center of a tootsie pop?
if you tell anyone i'll sue you

t. tootsie pop president

A muslim's cock

Maybe in your experience

>It's the current year!!!1!111!11!!!!!

Agree, too much loot for such a low lvl monster.

what did one nigger say to the other nigger?
nothing, both were shot by a cop
now go fuck yourself

Gonna need sauce...

It was never good, it was just you posting dead baby """"jokes"""" you found on google.

>we're all humans with the potential to accomplish wonderful things?

Nope

Nice one ;^)

This was actually funny. These are feels I've never felt b4. Usually browse Sup Forums but this is great.

Try googling femake cop raped or dimething you troglodyte

Last one:
What’s the difference between 100 dead babies and a Ferrari?
I don’t keep a Ferrari in my garage.

What do you call a paki in a bath?

Asif

Looks to be some kind of foreign comedy